Crociera di sangue

FINAL VOYAGE is a hilarious DIE HARD-on-a-ship type film that comes to us courtesy of Z-grade movie specialist Jim Wynorski. This one throws a mixed cast into a story that happily copies the likes of UNDER SIEGE et al with the only difference that this is a B-movie through and through; expect trite dialogue and wooden acting throughout. Plus any large-budget scene is typically stock footage stolen from an older and better movie.

The film's unorthodox hero is Dylan Walsh, playing a bodyguard caught up in a hostage situation. Walsh is best known for playing geeky scientist types in the likes of CONGO so his heroic turn here is a little odd. He's given support by Ice-T, playing himself as always, as the chief bad guy, and Claudia Christian as a memorably hot femme fatale. Erika Eleniak plays EXACTLY the same role as she did in UNDER SIEGE except without the nudity. Stephen Macht is the ship's captain and the hulking Michael Bailey Smith one of the henchmen.

It says something about Wynorski's talents as a director that I can call this one of his better films despite it being low par throughout. At least the pacing is fast and the action scenes are fun if laughable, so you can sit back and enjoy the cheese. It also helps that I have a high tolerance for DIE HARD rip-offs so it doesn't take much to entertain me. There's no denying that FINAL VOYAGE is a cheap and cheesy film though.

I saw this film about 5 years ago and I have to say it is one of the most unintentionally funny films I have ever seen. Practically everything in the film leaves you slack jawed with incredulity, from the "crashed" plane at the beginning (the camera was put at an angle to achieve the effect), to the number of shots fired from each gun without reloading, to my personal favourite the ships engines.

Final Voyage is either the worst film ever made, or paradoxically the best example of a B movie stinker ever made which fully deserves a 5 star review.

Enjoy!

This movie is poorly made, and also has nothing fresh or new to add. This movie was already done, and better i might add, in both Under Siege and Speed 2.

I also think Ice-T should never act in a movie again, if you can call what he does acting.

This movie made little sense. The acting sucked and the story needed a overhaul. The few things I did like about this film where wasted. First the cast. Claudia Christian's a babe and her character was pretty good as kick ass hitwoman. Erika Eleniak also a babe but she's done this gig before(in "Under Siege" and is 1000 times better than this). Next the production. It pi**es me off to see dumb movies wasting good FX and vehicles. I don't know how but they had a C-130 cargo plane to parachute from, during the day(Gees sutle). A night drop would have been much more stealthy. Hey, if you watch closely during the drop, one of the parachutist looses his diving mask. I won't go into tactical FUBARs in the theives operation(which there are many). I never saw theives dress in matching uniform either. Damn that ship sure came apart after the first explosion. Too many explosion for no reason. And the ballroom explosion was footage from "Deep Rising". Bottomline: with some work this could have been a good movie instead of stinker.

Don't waste your time. Amateurish at its worst.

Poor plot, pathetic script and even worse acting.

Nothing is realistic at all, who was in charge of continuity should never work again. Production was the cheapest they could could get on everything. CGI was very poor, but nothing was worse than Ice T's performance.

I'm very surprised that the actors got any work after this due to their inability to actually act.

Even the ending is flawed and makes you so happy that it has finally ended.

If you are considering watching this, please don't, go and watch Sesame Street, the acting is better and more believable and the stories are better than this garbage.