Toys Are Not for Children

I love trashy, bad movies but this was too much for me.

I am a big John Waters fan and thought this would be funny. Actually, it is a stab at being psychosexual. Evelyn Kingsley's huge nipples gave me nightmares.

Jamie is a mentally stunted adult obsessed with the father whom her mom kicked out when she was a young girl. This movie is insane. it did keep my interest throughout. Those who go into this film, thinking it'll be another 70's-era skin flick are in for a surprise. Nudity is kept to a minimum. This is more of a psychological mind&*%$ If you stick with it, it's a pretty good, creepy b-movie. This movie is coupled with "The Toy Box" on the Something Weird DVD.

My Grade:B

DVD Extras: Art Gallery;2 short subjects ( the Toy Telephone Truck, & the Christmas Eves); Trailers for Toys are not for Children, the Toybox, The Exquisite Cadaver, Tales of the Bizarre, The Single Girls, Ann and Eve, The Depraved, Sextet, The Naked Countess, and Labyrinth of Sex

The sort of movie that would have been a sepporting feature after the main movie at a drive-in, when half the cars had left! Stupid acting, stupid story! A bit of nudity, barely an attraction....

The good people at Something Weird Video obviously don't watch any of the exploitative junk they distribute and simply put films together purely based on matching titles or something! "Toys are not for Children" sounds like an ideal companion for another movie called "The Toy Box", but if you've seen them both, you can immediately conclude these two movies differ enormously when it comes to atmospheres, filming styles, substance and intensity level. "The Toy Box" is totally lurid and nonsensical crap about sexist aliens, whereas "Toys are not for Children" is an aspirant-controversial and mildly perverted tale about a girl with an unhealthy desire for her father. This is not a particularly pleasant movie – and definitely not the usual type of light-headed sleaze Something Weird brings forward – but it's nevertheless a curious attempt at drama and adult themes. 19-year-old Jamie is obsessed with her daddy ever since her shrewish mother kicked him out for visiting prostitutes. He still sends her presents and she "plays" with them, all right, but let's just say the toy soldier didn't get any training for this type of field work… Jamie gets married but refuses to sexually satiate with her husband and still only wants to play with daddy's toys and recapture memories of her early childhood. She then flees to the big city and moves in with an elderly prostitute who introduces her to a lot of old perverts that just love to act like Jamie's daddy. You don't need a degree in quantum-physics to predict the film builds up towards an actual encounter between Jamie and her dad in a climax oozing with incestuous vibes, bizarre fetishism and abrupt acts of vengeance. The atmosphere and themes of "Toys …" may be extremely sordid and sleazy, but there's actually very little nudity or sexual content on screen. Writer/director Stanley Brassloff had copious opportunities to turn the movie into one gigantic sex feast (Jamie's husband picks up randy girls in bars, Pearl's pimp assaults women, etc…) but the sexual content largely remains suggestive and off-screen. Rather than to focus on all the luscious and willing women in the film, the story solely revolves on the frigid Jamie and her messed up sentiments. Like the other genius reviewer already stated, "Toys are not for Children" probably one of the sleaziest concepts ever thought up, but the actual content is rather sober. That's quite a remarkable accomplishment; especially for the early 70's. The production values are also fairly decent, with monotonous but relatively stylish photography and nice musical guidance. Definitely recommended for avid cult fanatics, but stay clear if you're just looking for rancid sleaze. In that case, you're better off watching the aforementioned "The Toy Box".

Nineteen going on twenty, Jamie Godard (Marcia Forbes) has issues. When she was a little girl, her father doted on her, but his liking for prostitutes saw him thrown out of the house, leaving Jamie longing for dear daddy while her bitter mother told her that all men are worthless. Jamie's love for her father leads to an unhealthy obsession with the toys that he sends her, and a curiosity about the women of the night with whom daddy associates.

When Jamie strikes up a friendship with working girl Pearl (Evelyn Kingsley), her mother throws her out, and so she goes and gets hitched to her toy-store co-worker Charlie Belmond (Harlan Cary Poe), who is keen to get his tasty young bride in the sack. Unfortunately for Charlie, Jamie has no interest in him sexually, preferring the company of her toys in bed. Understandably frustrated, Charlie hits the local night spots to pick up women who will take care of his needs. Eventually, Jamie moves in with Pearl and her pimp Eddie (a wonderfully slimy performance from Luis Arroyo), changes her look and decides to sell her body, just like the ladies that daddy loves so much - a career choice that indulges her incestuous fantasies, but ultimately leads to tragedy.

Wow! This is one of those totally messed up '70s gems that makes being a fan of obscure cult cinematic oddities such fun. Oozing perversity without being excessively sleazy (nudity is kept to a minimum), it trundles along its increasingly twisted path, benefitting from a winning central performance from the delectable Miss Forbes in her one and only movie role. Writer/director Stanley H. Brassloff's restraint only goes to make the shocking final act all the more impactful.

For those who like their movies to explore taboo themes and possess an emotional wallop, this is highly recommended viewing, and would make a terrific double bill with the equally perverse Love Me Deadly (1972), which deals with the uncomfortable subject of necrophilia.