I Love You, Don't Touch Me!

I recently watched "I Love You...Don't Touch Me!" and was surprised to find that I thoroughly enjoyed it, despite the initial negative reviews from its release. More recent reviews have been kinder, and I'm glad to count myself among the fans. As a romance connoisseur, I'm shocked I hadn't heard of it before.

One of the things that charmed me was the film's nostalgic 90s aesthetic, complete with light makeup, dark lipstick, stockings, and maxi dresses paired with black shoes. I also appreciated the humor in the character's assumption that, at 25, she should be in a serious relationship - a sentiment that would likely be pushed back to 35 in a modern film. The last movie I watched with this theme, Don't Touch if You Ain't Prayed, the heroine was 40.

Initially, I was worried that the movie would try too hard to be funny, especially with the voiceover introduction. However, it turned out to be a more serious and thoughtful exploration of relationships than I expected. While some reviewers have dismissed it as a "film school project," I think it's a delightful example of a quirky independent romantic film - and I LOVE those!

The heroine, Katy, is relatable and likable, and I agree with the intellectual premise that she needs to have experiences outside of her comfort zone (and her long-standing friendship with Ben) to truly settle down with him in the end. Katy has undeniable chemistry with both Ben and the older man she eventually dates, Richard. Her relationships with her various friends, including her uptight engaged friend, her overly sexualized coworker, and her loud neighbor, add depth to the story.

Also, what I found interesting is that the film didn't tie Katy's career struggles to her romantic journey. Instead, it left her job situation open-ended, focusing on her emotional growth and the development of her relationships. In the end, Katy chooses the man whom she has loved forever, and it's a satisfying conclusion to her journey. Tho there was a reveal regarding her perfect best friend's marriage that happened toward the end and was not expounded upon.

Overall, I'm glad I discovered this hidden gem, and I think fans of romantic comedies will appreciate its unique charm.

This film shows glimmers of talent, but strikes so many false notes that film and filmmaker lose all credibility.

It purports to be the story of 25-year-old, Katie, who -- although the product of what she views as the perfect relationship -- is so scarred by an early boyfriend's infidelity that she remains a virgin. One can only pray that, like many early film-making efforts, this isn't autobiographical.

This same repressed virgin has, as close friends, an exuberant (read, promiscuous) party girl and a buttoned-down perfectionist, neither of whom she appears to like very much. Her best friend, though, is the companionable Ben, who loves her, but whom she cannot picture in any romantic role. This doesn't stop her from a certain dog-in-the-manger attitude that arises after she sets him up with her party-girl pal.

This same repressed virgin, who believes sex without love is meaningless, gives it all up to a suave older man who has already made it abundantly clear to her that he goes through women like some go through dental floss.

None of these situations are unbelievable *per se*, but the writer-director gives none of them the space to develop naturally. We're supposed to believe that the suave older lover who has literally said and done ALL the right things throughout the relationship, would suddenly make a video-related misstep so monumental as to send the relationship down the path to its inevitable end. We're greeted with a behind-closed-doors wedding day revelation in the relationship of the perfectionist friend and her new husband that gets no set-up nor explanation. Katie, an aspiring singer, is deemed too out-of-touch to be able to convey emotion when auditioning for an egg jingle, but manages to put over a smoldering torch song a few days later, while in the same virginal state (although she IS feeling tempted, for apparently the first time).

Katie's own change-of-heart, at film's end, receives the same spliced-in treatment.

The film is very talky, which would be all right if the dialogue were believable, but mostly we're treated to Katie's self-righteous rants. It's hard to believe anyone would be friends with this neurotic prig.

Davis, the writer-director, shows some visual and conceptual talent in the film, but should probably stick to interpreting the visions of more gifted and insightful writers. The entire film smacked of film-school project, which still isn't really enough to redeem it.

This is an original comedy from a woman's point of view. The characters are all very real, not like in most movies where they feel written to be a certain way, here they seem like people who actually exist. Low budget, but still better than most romantic comedies out there. Good dialogue and great music.

What happened to the end of this movie? Did the money suddenly run out? We're left hanging and there's no reasonable conclusion to the story. Had this unbelievable oversight been corrected, the movie could have merited at least another star, or perhaps two.

Here's another of those comedy/dramas about a single twentysomething woman wondering why her relationships don't work and why her life isn't what she wants. If that doesn't sound like your type of film I'd stay away because if anything our heroine in this one seems a little more neurotic than usual. But if it does sound like your thing, stick with this one, it gets better as it goes along.

Katie (Marla Schaffel) is 25 and conflicted, to say the least, about her desire to terminate her virginity. Writer/director Judy Davis leads us through all the ups and downs on her rocky road, and it's a mostly fine effort.