The Dallas Connection

There is one name today in the realm of B style soft core skin flicks and that is Sidaris. This is the kind of movie that if you saw it when you were 13, you wouldn't leave your room for a week. This movie knows it is an exploitation flick and doesn't take itself too seriously. It is actually fun to watch as more than just a parade of large breasts. Of course, there is a strip club sequence that is tough to forget. I wouldn't rent this one, but it kept me awake on cable.

Excellent for what it intends Colorful, nice costumes for the girls. Good looking guys.

Rigid cardboard acting, but in an amusing way.

Jet skis, motor boats, nice pacing, great explosions that would rival Hollywood (unlike todays computer generated b movie explosions), fun characters, nice variety in the women (and cute!), and on.

I wouldn't say it lacks action. Just trends more to spy and espionage intrigue. In a goofy way of course.

Imdb/amazon...stop with the 600 character review minimum. B movies dont require a New York Times review.

Imdb/amazon...stop with the 600 character review minimum. B movies dont require a New York Times review.

Very entertaining.

If you've seen one Sidaris flick (even those directed by his son), I think you've seen 'em all. Bullets, babes, explosions. That was the formula and 'The Dallas Connection' is no different. The story is silly - not really worth a mention - and the budgetary restraints keep the action scenes on the short side.

The real value in a Sidaris flick are the women on display. Supplied here by Playboy Playmate Wendy Hamilton & Penthouse Pets Julie Strain, Samantha Phillips and Julie K. Smith (one woman who seriously makes me drool). Her cowgirl grind in the club and the hot tub scene easily take top honors.

Take away the little bit of action and this is a glorified T&A flick. You know this, I know this. It doesn't waste any time getting to the good stuff. Julie Strain has a sex scene intertwined with the opening credits. Unless you're in pursuit of seeing some pretty ladies get naked in a format only the Sidaris name could supply don't say I didn't warn you otherwise.

Howsabout this for dumb plot: a group of sexy female killers-for-hire (code-names Black Widow, Cobra and Scorpion) bump off several scientists, and are then given the task of getting hold of four computer chips that, when combined, can control a satellite with the power to pinpoint the exact locations of all of the world's weapons; it's a mission that might prove impossible to complete were the chips sensibly locked away in a high security vault, but instead each is hidden inside a medallion and worn out-and-about by government agents, making life a whole lot easier for the big-breasted assassins.

With such a laughable set-up and very little in the way of decent (non-sex related) action, The Dallas Connection is easily one of the weaker films in my Sidaris 'Girls, Guns & G-Strings' box set, but even though the film's writer/director Drew Sidaris possesses even less talent than his father Andy when it comes to telling a decent story, he's a chip off the old block when it comes to hot women, The Dallas Connection featuring some of the most physically impressive ladies of the whole series.

Leggy Julie Strain is back once again, as head assassin Black Widow, wearing her usual assortment of bondage themed outfits and skirts that fail to reach as far as her stocking tops; assisting her is blonde Julie K. Smith (as Cobra), owner of the film's most impressive chest, and scorching brunette Wendy Hamilton (as Scorpion) who really knows how to work the wet suit and thigh-high PVC boots look. Working for the good-guys, we get silicone-chested Sam Phillips as Samantha Maxx, one of the agents tasked with wearing a medallion. All the ladies get nekkid at some point or other to get it one with the film's assorted hunks, making this one just about worth a watch despite the dreadful story, diabolical acting and dull direction.

The usual action flesh fantasy for male viewers, this Sidaris flick is not as good as a few others, but the girls looks great (there is my favorite Playmate, Wendy Hamilton, that doesn't show as much as I hope, but it's still a threat; there is also Julie Strain's Black Widow, with an opening scene Basic Instinct style that it's really good) and the action is good enough to let the 90 minutes of the movie pass without any boring moment. The plot is contrived, but it's part of the show: for a Sidaris movie it's a good enough one