Blonde Heaven

An horrible skin film, void of any redeeming value, other than a few assorted beauties (most of them not even blonde), who wander through this movie without any clothes on. Story is ridicolous. There are at least two scream queens (Julie Strain and Michelle Bauer), but even the fans of the horror movies will be bored by this Blonde Heaven.

Director DeCouteau should have the courage to make real porno movies, not absolutely vain exercises in simulated sex like the several ones he made for Full Moon and other companies.

A pity.

I thought this would be a good movie, but it ended up sucking at the end (literally!) Julie Strain has sex with a guy through the opening credits....it was quite entertaining watching them go through so many positions in so little time. The plot is wafer thin and full of old, tired concepts. The country hick girl comes to L.A. to be an actress (don't they all?). Unfortunately, her boyfriend tags along unknowingly (that's until he finds her and they have sex, go fig). "Blonde Heaven" is the code name for an escort service that's really a coven of bloodsucking vampires. (See "TFTC: Bordello of Blood") Julie Strain is the head vamp/madam, and hires the country girl to be one of her "girls". If you notice, whenever you see someone in "Blonde Heaven" they're wearing black clothes and black shades...I guess they do that in order to recognize them as the "bad guys". The ending is also pretty generic as well....I won't ruin it for the 5 of you that want to wait for the ending. The acting is bad, the sex scenes are horrible, and the music is downright awful....but then again, Julie Strain is in it. Julie's presence in this flick (along with my all-time fave B-movie actress Monique Parent), and Julie's sex scene in the opening credits keep this movie from receiving an F, but just barely. I give it a D+; see it at your own risk.

David DeCoteau isn't known as one of the great B-movie directors but he sunk beneath his own lowest levels with this one. In addition to what everyone has said, may I add that one scene of Julie Strain undressing was done in extreme long shot whereas every time one of the guys was nude, his butt was shoved in our faces. What up with that!? However it was nice to see, as Joe Bob Briggs might say, some gratuitous naked Michelle Bauer for old times sake. If this is the new Full Moon Pictures I say bring back Phil Fondacaro and the Puppet Master.

this movie has typical b movie acting and actors,but it has some upbeat music, beautiful buff girls and guys, and convincing simulated sex scenes. if you want to watch a movie just for pure sexual gratification, this is it.

Wow...this was a dumb movie. Now to be fair, my expectations are never high when I am preparing to watch an erotic thriller, but this was lame even compared to most films in this genre. The plot is practically nonexistent, and what little story there is happens to be painfully bad. Therefore, the only reason to watch this film is for female flesh. But, even if you're THAT desperate to see oodles of nudity, I can only hope that you keep your finger close to the fast-forward button, because this film is just plain awful.