Judge and Jury

So much for JUDGE AND JURY, which lives up to its nonsense title. What good is there? The lighting is terribly foggy! Another horror movie you ask? Well, that's perfectly explainable. David Keith actually does pretty good at disguising clowns, chefs, and other shenanigans while being the killer who escaped death row. But overall, despite some new twists, it's reasonably stupid. Unapix has been putting out some ludicrous productions recently, and this one only means so much. We, the jury, find this film guilty for its indecent exposure to many of us sitting around believing it's a total waste of our time!

If this is not heavily featured on every list of "what not to watch", it should only be because those keeping that particular list are not aware of its existence, which, as long as that remains so, is the acceptable alternative. I'm not kidding you, this is a *bad* "movie". Joseph Meeker returns from the dead, with various vague, undefined supernatural powers, the most employed of which would seem to be appearing in new, increasingly comical-looking and ridiculous(and never scary or creepy... in general, when this goes for the latter of those, it winds up just being bizarre, and attempts at the former just don't work, period) outfits and stereotypes/archetypes, and he is portrayed by David Keith(whom I respect in... well, at least Daredevil), doing a more often than not terribly inconsistent(which could also have to do with script) and often over the top performance. A character or two have personalities so unbelievably irritating that they're painful to watch. The editing thinks it's considerably more clever than it really is(and what on Earth was with the red tint for the flashbacks?). Cinematography... oh, dear. Framing, coverage, effective use of angle(that one could be attributed some to editing, too, perhaps), please, guys, stop me when I say something you've ever heard about the existence of. As far as the technical side goes, this is a pretty lousy excuse for something more worthwhile to put in the projector than unexposed film. But why stop there? The plot is just poor. The basic idea's been done, and it's been done so much better than this(The Crow would be one). The way it's told is gimmicky, and while there is some explanation behind the flashbacks, it still doesn't satisfy. Pacing is about non-existent. The lead is distinctly unlikeable, and there's more personality in a barn door, not to mention that those are also considerably less wooden. Kelly Perine and Thomas Ian Nicholas? What in the name of all that is good and just(pun intended) are you doing in this? Perine, you were already funny before this, on The Drew Carey Show, Nicholas, well, I haven't seen you in anything preceding American Pie, but if nothing else, you *were* funny later on, and in those productions, the amusement was intentional. Dialog is... the less said, the better. Language is unrestrained, and tends to be stupid. The violence is shoddily done, and they don't even seem to care to try to hide it(hinting at it might have been the smarter strategy). Characters, don't get me started. Why spend so much energy on portraying unexciting, at times utterly illogical, events? The more you think about this, the worse it gets. It's not even passable as a "bad horror flick", or a B movie(it may very well pass through the rest of the alphabet, and go further still), it couldn't scare you on the scariest day of your life if it had an electrified scaring machine. I recommend this only to people who want to disprove how bad this is, and don't say I didn't warn ya. 1/10

I had remembered seeing this a long time ago on one of those premium services like HBO or MAX Wel long story short I finally got the chance to rewatch this Thanks to a upload on Rumble It's as good as I had remembered Meeker and his new bride are involved in a robbery gone wrong Meeker's bride is accidentally shot and killed during the robbery After Meeker is electrocuted in prison He is somehow able to comeback and he's seeking revenge on the man who killed his bride I'm sure most people will probably see this as a B movie But it's a solid B movie Good action film extremely underrated (in my opinion) David Keith makes a good bad guy.

Before I begin, let me get something off my chest: I'm a huge fan of John Eyres' first film PROJECT: SHADOWCHASER. The film, a B-grade cross of both THE TERMINATOR & DIE HARD, may not be the work of a cinematic genius, but is a hugely entertaining action film that became a cult hit (& spawned two sequels & a spin off).

Judge and Jury begins with Joseph Meeker, a convicted killer who was sent to Death Row following his capture after the so-called "Bloody Shootout" (which seems like a poor name for a killing spree – Meeker kills three people while trying to rob a convenience store), being led to the electric chair. There is an amusing scene where Meeker talks to the priest about living for sex but meeting his one true love (who was killed during the shootout), expressing his revenge for the person who killed her – Michael Silvano, a washed-up football star who spends his days watching his son Alex practicing football with his high school team (and ends up harassing his son's coach). But once executed, Meeker returns as a revenant (or as Kelly Perine calls "a hamburger without the fries"), whose sole aim is to get his revenge, which basically means making Silvano's life a misery.

Let me point out the fact that Judge and Jury is not a true horror film. It is a supernatural action film, with Meeker chasing Silvano, using his ability to change form (which amounts to David Keith dressing up as everything from an Elvis impersonator, a French chef (with an accent as bad as his moustache), a drag queen, a clown & a stand-up comedian), a shotgun which fires explosive rounds & an invulnerability to death (although that doesn't stop Martin Kove from shooting Keith with a Desert Eagle), to pay Silvano back for killing Meeker's wife.

Director John Eyres does not seem interested in characterisations, instead focusing solely on action scenes, which the film has plenty of. But that is the film's main flaw, since there's nothing to connect the action scenes together. The acting is surprisingly good, with Keith delivering the best performance, supported ably by Kove, as well as Paul Koslo, who plays the washed-up cop quite well. Kelly Perine is annoying as the cabbie who tries to help but makes the situation worse.

Okay, so what we have here is a nice little B-movie with some ridiculous casting-decisions, an over-the-top-of-the-top bad guy who likes cross-dressing and looking like a bozo (literally), and a pre-fame Thomas Ian Nicholas (from "American Pie") with long wavy hair and cool posters of Martin Kove on his bedroom wall (where can I get those??)! That kid is so rad, apart from the fact that Martin Kove in this movie plays his dad! I mean, seriously.. who the hell has a GIANT poster of their own DAD hanging on the wall?? But anyway, he tears it down after his parents has an argument, so it's a good plot-piece (i.e. the kid losing faith in his dad, and thus removes every idolizing image he has of him in his room).

Anyways, back to the plot: David Keith (NOT to be mistaken by Keith David, who is one helluva cool guy) plays this maniacal homicidal lunatic biker-type, Joseph Meeker, who gets arrested during a stick-up, where his girlfriend Mary (played by Patricia Scanlon, who we all know from her other movies where she plays memorable parts like "Woman from Brooklyn", "Cocktail Waitress" and "Stoned Customer") accidentally gets killed, after they both needlessly had offed a few people themselves.

So after getting arrested by Detective Lockhart (Paul Koslo, The Omega Man, Joe Kidd, etc.), he wows revenge from beyond the grave on all those who captured him and killed his girlfriend - i.e. Detective Lockhart and family-man/football-star Michael Silvano, who is played the ever-so-lovable Martin Kove, who we all know as the bad-ass John Kreese from the "Karate Kid"-movies, as well as from "Rambo II" and "Death Race 2000", where he also played bad-ass "shoot-first, think later"-type characters.

Okay, so after Meeker's execution, where he talked about "getting some pussy" to a priest and did other obscene things, he somehow returns from the dead, and haunts Silvano's family, chasing him and his buddies around for about 3/4 of the movie. Oh yeah, somehow Meeker has a shotgun which shoots exploding fireballs (that for some reason have no effect on whoever gets hit by them)! And he wears about a dozen of ridiculously redundant costumes while making quite a few memorable quotes (none of which have been added here yet - and I don't really feel like it at the moment)..

Highlight cameos: Kelly Perine plays this unfortunate homeless cab-driver who gets hijacked by Silvano, and then decides to tag along for the rest of the movie (big mistake), and also a short cameo by the fantastic Bob Minor (who always plays this big ass-kicking black dude) as a pool-playing biker, who happens to hang around in the wrong bar at the wrong time.

Verdict: Guilty of the charges of being a hilariously bad B-movie, full of ridiculous dialogue and tons of badly scripted (and filmed) scenes, which should make the viewer roll on the floor laughing, rather than cowering behind the sofa, which was probably intended by the makers of this movie. Good bad stuff. 6/10