- Kevin Kinkirk: Lucy Camden, will you marry me?
- Lucy Camden: [to God] Thank you.
- [to Kevin]
- Lucy Camden: Yes, Kevin Kinkirk, I will marry you.
- Eric: All right, Simon, I don't like what you have been doing. And it's really difficult to believe that after growing up in this family, you could just so easily abandon what you've been taught and what I think you believe and... I do love you, son, I do. I hate what you've been doing, but I love you.
- [as Annie bangs her head into a wall after being told her father is remarrying]
- Eric: Honey, honey, not now. I-I don't know how to plaster.
- Eric: There's always going to be somebody who'll try to take your dignity and self-esteem. Just never let them take your voice.
- Eric: Well, the wind is real, but you can't see the wind. You know, you can only see the leaves rustling in the trees. Pain is real but you can't see pain. You can only see tears. Happiness is real, but you can't see happiness. You can only see the smile on someone's face.
- Ruthie: Do you have to have special clothes to feel special? I just put on a clean pair of underwear and I feel great.
- [Annie is showing Ruthie her baby book]
- Annie: See my tummy? That's you.
- Ruthie: Maybe I never should have come out.
- Annie: But... look what you would've missed... riding on Daddy's shoulders... and Simon rocking you on the front porch... and Mary... giving you a bath in the kitchen sink.
- Ruthie: My butt was a lot smaller then.
- Annie: All of our... bottoms were a lot smaller then.
- Rev. Morgan Hamilton: We cannot fight hate with hate. What are we teaching our children today? That will make things better tomorrow?
- Lucy Camden: I want to be a minister because I want to be like my dad. I want to do what he does, I want to be who he is in the community. I want to serve God and I want to serve mankind. And I believe that this is my purpose in life and I was guided to that purpose in a unique way, by being the daughter of a minister.
- Lucy Camden: I had no idea this was your life.
- Mike Pierce: My life's just fine and you know why? I'm alive... and I'm grateful for every second of every day.
- Annie: Ginger... somebody. What do you mean you don't know? How can you not know? How many "Ginger"s do you have there? Is there a "Ginger" convention in town or something?
- Matt: This is Bernie, Mary Camden's attorney.
- Credit Card Collector: Mary Camden can't afford to pay a $50 bill but she has an attorney?
- Simon: Who do you think you are, grabbing the phone out of my hand like that?
- Ruthie: Someone who needed to make a phone call and I made it, so you can have your stupid phone back.
- Simon: Isn't it a rule in this house that we have to respect each other or at least pretend to respect each other?
- Ruthie: Well, no one respects me. No one even pretends to.
- Eric: You, Lucy Camden, are an outstanding person. And if they gave out an award for the best in the human race, you would win it year after year.
- [about Ben's girlfriends]
- Kevin Kinkirk: There's always something wrong with the girls you pick.
- Ben Kinkirk: What about Mary?
- Kevin Kinkirk: I rest my case.
- Eric: You expect me to believe that you have to choose between family and that low life, cradle-robbing sky jockey?
- [Eric is telling Annie about the nightmare he had]
- Eric: I was marrying Kevin and Lucy in my underwear.
- Ruthie: You've got money, you've got new clothes, and women are unexplainably attracted to you. Are you Spiderman or something?
- Simon: Ruthie... how ya doing?
- Ruthie: Fine, how are you doing?
- Simon: Fine... but I'm not in school.
- Ruthie: ...bye.
- Simon: Wait... how is school?
- Ruthie: Fine, except for algerbra.
- Simon: You're lying... no one said anything to you about me?
- Ruthie: Well, why would they?
- Simon: Becase I'm your brother and... the kid on the bike was your age.
- Ruthie: He didn't go to my school.
- Simon: Look, you don't have to protect me. I have it easier than you, I'm not in school.
- Ruthie: [hugs him] Simon, no one has it harder than you.
- Simon: I guess my inner voice was telling me... you're going to hell anyway for killing that guy... so I might as well have sex.
- Ruthie: [to Robbie and Lucy] By the power invested in me, in *me*, I now pronounce you a couple. You may now kiss you ex-girlfriend's sister. You know, you guys should really go on a talk show.
- Annie: There is one thing I've noticed about teenage boys from watching your sisters, and that is they all come back. Sooner or later, all of them come back.
- Matt: [to Kevin] Consider this your initiation in to the Camden family. It's one thing to give my sister a ring, marry her and father a child. It's another thing, a better thing to join her brother in a good old-fashioned family caper.
- Lucy: Today, I am not your daughter, your sister or your wife, I am Lucy Kinkirk. The Reverend Lucy Kinkirk.
- [Eric is banging his head against the wall]
- Annie: Could you not do that, honey? I don't have time to plaster.
- [as Eric bangs his head into a wall during a visit from both of their parents]
- Annie: Honey, honey, not now. I don't have time to plaster.
- [to her friend after agreeing with Eric to a subtle approach]
- Gladys Bink: You are such a liar!
- [Eric looks dumbfounded]
- Gladys Bink: Subtle never really worked for me.
- [Eric to Annie]
- Eric: Are you aware that our living room is filled with children who don't belong to us?