Bloodlust

This is an Australian film. The cast go in and out of Australian and phoney American accents for the duration because they are either morons or have absolutely no imagination. Bloodlust is gleefully, purposely and ridiculously bad. I laughed at it because it was bad but never at the 'black humour' It is never frightening, never suspenseful, hardly gory and punishes you throughout it's entire running time with it's mere existence, it took a constant watch checking feat of super human endurance to get through the last 30 minutes. On the positive side, the rich guy with the big mobile phone who gets car jacked close to the beginning delivered the most incredible performance I have ever seen. I would recommend this to crass, stoned and mediocre people.

Some people are born clueless I guess. The movie is AUSTRALIAN - the "fake" English accents are in fact Australian accents! The actors who are speaking in this dialect happen to be real junkies, prostitutes and pimps which certainly adds a bit of authenticity if not an interestingly perverse element to the movie. Also, the music is by The Buzzcocks, a well thought of Industrial/Punk band that sure ain't "80's hard rock" and is totally appropriate to the approach of this revisionist vampire outing. Yeah, sure they can walk around in sunlight, so what? If no filmmaker could diverge from the exact formula in popular mythology things would get pretty boring and predictable and we would be missing out on a lot of classic cinema. Though admittedly the drooling masses like their mindless entertainment to adhere to predictable rules. Actually I'm amazed that there was only one entry here for this movie. It's been banned in the UK due to the copious amounts of sex and gore, but still there are other places where this has been seen, where are the real trash movie fans when ya need 'em?

At first glance, this movie has got everything a psycho wants: a vampire story with a "not under 18" restriction, filled with hyper-violence, drugs, gore, sex (including lesbian sex), some fanatics zealots and even a gay necrophiliac cop! But then, this movie is a succession of bad story (so thin), bad acting -with a ridiculous english accent making you believe you're watching a bad Monty Python -, bad music ('80s hard rock), the videotaping is awful, the ending is a real shame... Plus the scenes of sex are ridiculous, the gore not very impressive. And those vampires reflect in a mirror, and don't even fear daylight! You get to be very disappointed, unless you see it as a "Space Mutiny" or "Troll 2". I hope Bloodlust will one day reach the bottom 100, because that's its real place.

I'd say it can still be fun to watch, if you have friends and enough beer.

3/10

I feel no remorse is saying that Bloodlust is quite possibly one of the worst films ever made. Not because of the fact that the budget looks lower than that of the average backyard porn flick, or that the acting sucks or whatever...

It's more about the fact that this is advertised as being a "vampire movie", however, for anybody who's ever seen a vampire film, it's nice when they actually feature some characters that you can say without a doubt, "yep, that person's a vampire" rather than "yep, that person's a wolf-haired gimp in fluoro sweatpants".

Truly bad.

Three vampires (who can walk in the sunlight and enter a church, no problem, and have no fangs) find themselves pursued by a mobster and his men after they pull a heist; also after the trio of bloodsuckers are a group of religious fanatics and a pair of corrupt cops.

Bloodlust is a low budget Aussie comedy/horror clearly inspired by the success of fellow antipodean, Peter Jackson: it's over the top in terms of violence and delivers plenty of 'bad taste' moments. It doesn't, however, have any of the charm of a Jackson movie. The worst aspect of the whole film is its amateur cast and the thoroughly unappealing characters they play: no-one can act, so everyone overacts - wildly - making an already unlikable bunch all the more irritating. At first I thought the cops were the pits, then the religious folk proved even worse, and then the gangsters took exaggerated mannerisms one step further. Also, the cast start off trying to speak in American accents, but soon admit to themselves that they're not very convincing and revert to their native Aussie twang.

Of course, not very many people will watch this expecting a masterclass in acting: it's the splatter and general deviancy that are the film's main selling points. Unfortunately, the gore isn't very impressive and the movie isn't anywhere near as edgy or as daring as it likes to think it is. The most outrageous moment is a spot of gay necrophilia, but once again, a ridiculous OTT performance makes for a painfully unfunny and not in the least bit shocking scene.

I have to admit to being impressed by the amount of weapons amassed for the movie, which allows for plenty of bloody squib action during the all-guns-blazing finalé; I just wish as much effort had gone into finding proper actors, a decent scriptwriter and better special effects.