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As a teen in the 1980's and someone prone to watching all sorts of b, c and z-grade movie junk, I was somewhat surprised when I came across this 1990 title recently. Surprised as in wondering how I could not have seen or even heard of this flick before. I mean, as the proud owner of Hot Dog The Movie and Ski School 1 AND 2 (not to mention all the Police Academy movies), it almost seemed like a cinematic misdemeanor that I hadn't seen Ski Patrol.

I suppose I should say that had I saw Ski Patrol back in 1990, doubtless I would have shaken my head in contempt at how dumb and inept Ski Patrol was. And I wouldn't have been incorrect in thinking so. Then again, when the biggest names in your movie are Ray Walston and Martin Mull - and even those two are barely in the movie for all of 15 minutes - expectations shouldn't be set particularly high.

Even by that diminished standard, Ski Patrol is very lacking in several of the key areas that constitute the archetypal 1980's wacky teen boner comedy and despite being released in 1990, Ski Patrol is VERY much along the lines of a 1980's wacky teen boner comedy...albeit an inept one.

Ski Patrol DOES establish the Snobs vs. Slobs/Unlikeable Winners vs. Lovable Losers scenario, so at least that box got checked off. The problem lies squarely with the casting, in that the cast is chock full of non-charismatic, unfunny, amateurish actors doing non-memorable, unfunny things. It's just one of those deals with a comedy where if the comedy falls flat the movie falls flat. By that score, Ski Patrol is the equivalent of a can of soda opened and left sitting on a counter for several hours. A lot of second- and third-rate sight gags and scenarios that perhaps a kid of 6 years old would find mildly amusing. Which, I suppose is in keeping with the PG rating. Yep, Ski Patrol is rated PG. Now, why a movie is clearly trying to be a wacky teen boner comedy yet also attain a PG rating is a mystery to me. Not even a PG-13 with a brief glimpse of some side boob. Nope. A single 10 second shot of a couple of girls in some not particularly skimpy bikinis is about all the sensuality this flick has to offer.

What I will say Ski Patrol DOES have are some great sequences of people doing advanced skiing. No, really. I found the skiing sequences well filmed and exciting to watch. So, there's that, I suppose.

Even with all that said, though, it'd be a bit too easy to beat up on this 35-year-old failed comedy too much. And Ski Patrol really doesn't deserve to be beat up on that much, either. It's just this non-offensive, unfunny movie...a bit of a rip-off in terms of sort of representing itself as something it wasn't re: the boner comedy angle - since it was neither funny nor revealing - but hardly a crime against humanity. Something clearly designed back then to churn out a quick buck in a few theaters, a few more quick bucks in the video rental stores then be duly forgotten.

Now, I had actually never seen, much less ever heard about, this 1990 comedy titled "Ski Patrol" before now as 2022 is about to come to a closure. And thus I sat down to watch it, of course. I figured I would be in for a movie in the likes of the many slapstick comedies of the late 1980s and early 1990s.

Writers Steven Long Mitchell, Craig W. Van Sickle and Wink Roberts put together a fair enough script here for director Richard Correll to bring to life on the screen. As it turned out, then I hadn't exactly been missing out of a comedy gem here. If you have seen any comedies from the late 1980s and early 1990s, then you know what you are getting here with "Ski Patrol", for better or worse.

Something that impressed me about "Ski Patrol" was the cast ensemble. There was a good handful of familiar faces on the cast list here, with the likes of Leslie Jordan, Paul Feig, George Lopez, Steve Hytner and Ray Walston.

For a comedy then there wasn't really all that much to laugh about throughout the course of the 91 minutes that the movie ran for. And on that account then "Ski Patrol" wasn't really an outstanding or memorable early 1990s comedy.

"Ski Patrol" was watchable, sure, but it is not a movie that I will ever return to watch again. There were far more entertaining and funny comedies from the same era, so this one sort of barely got by.

My rating of "Ski Patrol" lands on a five out of ten stars.

Why is Ski Patrol not on DVD??? It is a true classic of the perhaps cheesy and clichéd, but wonderfully fun and endearing genre group of 1980s/early-90s B-Comedies.

This movie is pure, silly, unironic fun - it's hard to find a movie like this these days. George Lopez is great in his first acting role - And everyone needs to see Paul Feig's MJ-inspired dance sequence. He tears it up! As well as his onstage performance with 'Iceman' to win the talent show and thus save the Ski Patrol from the evil young blond yuppie Lance and his devious developer boss. Intrigued? That's what I thought - Ski Patrol is the ultimate B-Comedy cult film, the genre that the DVD format was made for!! Let's see a release soon, eh? - taste death, live life!

This movie didn't score well at the Oscars and there's no doubt why. It is a stupid movie but I did laugh at one scene. It's when Murray, a short ski-instructor, who's about 5'4" is given some growth formula from his intructees. They switch the hem on his pants and lower the height line on his wall to make him believe that he's actually growing. One night at a bar Murray decides to go off at how tall he is and that's when the guys really get him. Murray awakes to find that he's too big for his own bed. He bursts through the ceiling of an Elf's Dorm beside a Santa display screaming as the jokers take pictures of him. This ONE scene almost saves the entire movie.

If you're looking for a fun ski comedy, go with Ski School. Ski Patrol is the lame red-headed stepbrother of ski comedies. It tries to be funny but it's anything but. Tries way too hard.