Death Train

The premise is so weird which the writer David Jackson thought was dealing with a moronic audience, if someone has a bomb on Germany to send it straight to Iraq, quite sure the easy way is take it by airplane, instead he enforced a lame screenplay with lot of mismatches and full of holes concerning the accuracy send it by a slowly older train, worst lead by a American mercenary sponsored by a Russian General aiming for respawn a newest URSS already split, Brosnan is called from far off Daytona on Florida takes two schedule flight toward Germany team up with gorgeous Alexandra Paul a sort expert in guns, five language and so on, under the order of the big boss Patrick Stewart from U. N.'s security section against terrorism.

A sharp eye can see all juggling of the writer to fooled the less informed in those countless oddities along the journey of train, likewise in sleeping gas thrown on locomotive, all hijackers previously had gas masks, silly attempt, in the 10 miles tunnel on border of Swiss and Italy the wiser Patrick Stewart has a brainy idea to cut off a small section of a rail train in order to stuck the train inside the tunnel, it wouldn't be easy explode it there, nobody could fix it whatsoever, well we have to stand such foolish thing, and about the countdown bomb, if you guessed that Brosnan will cut all wires on last second before the blasting you is a true genius, in other hand even the far-fetched storyline the picture hold the viewer at chair awake.

Thanks for reading.

Resume: First watch: 2023 / How many: 1 / Source: DVD / Rating: 4.

TV thriller made in the early ninties starring heavyweights such as "Pierce Brosnan" desperate for a Bond type actionner (yet can't seem to handle any action sequence), Christopher Lee (in perhaps his most boring role ever) and Patrick Stewart (who appears to be doing this for the money).

Chris Lee is funding the transportation of a nuclear warhead to Iraq so that he can lead the Russians to re-claim the warhead by conquering Iraq (despite the fact that Russia were in league with Iraqis anyway - that's why the US funded Iraq's leadership at the time with chemical weaponary, etc).

The plot is paperthin, I still don't understand why the a-bomb has to be transported via train. I don't understand how doing a "media" job will allow Chris Lee's "Iron" man of Russia to become a leader for Russia.

The train also keeps stopping, the SWAT team are silly and there are too many breaks for obilitary adverts for Coca-Cola or Pepsi, or whatever the hell that Baywatch lady drinks.

Its too long, too boring and annoying.

Overall: 1/10.

Here are my suggestions for the cartoon bubbles over the actors heads that showed what they were really thinking at the time:

Pierce Brosnan: "My God, what am I doing in this piece of garbage"?

Patrick Stewart: "Where am I? This isn't a starship".

Miss ex-Babewatch: "Why won't anyone take me seriously? Mine aren't as big as Pamela's. See?"

What a dreadful piece of crap. No wonder Alistair Maclean didn't want anything to do with it.

When I found `Detonator' at the video store and saw that it had Patrick Stewart and Pierce Brosnan in the staring roles, I got my hopes up. I thought, with Captain Pacard and James Bond in the movie, it should be pretty good. Then I saw that Alexandra Paul and Christopher Lee were also in the movie and thought with a cast like that, how could the film help but be good. Well, I found out.

The premise of the movie is not bad; a fanatical Russian military man (Christopher Lee) builds a nuclear bomb and tries to detonate it, on a train bound for Iran, to trigger a military resurrection of the former Soviet Union. Of course, an elite team of United Nations commandos (Patrick Stewart, Pierce Brosnan and Alexandra Paul) tries to stop the train before ultimate fireworks show takes place. Maybe not the most original storyline for an action/adventure movie, but it had some potential.

Unfortunately, not even this cast could make up for the horrible script `Detonator' offers. This is not the first script David Jackson has written, but it sure seems like it. In fact, the dialog is so dry and uninspired, that the chemistry one would expect between actors of this caliber is absolutely non-existent; which makes this movie boring, and a real disappointment.

Anyone watching this film because Alistair Maclean's name is on it will be sorely let down. A weak plot involving stolen nukes is nothing you haven't seen before, done better. Some of the acting (Brosnan, Stewart and Paul) is good, but Ted Levine is simply laughable as the secondary antagonist. His silly redneck character weakens any threat to his scenes with Brosnan. The venerable Christopher Lee is rather miscast as an evil Russian mastermind.

Action scenes and photography are OK, but the editing, music and direction are dull. I also found it funny that it is some sort of UN team that goes after the nukes, where in real life it would be the Navy Seals or Delta Force that would be sent to deal with this train (and would certainly do a better job).