Una donna in 'crescendo'

I bought a 4-movie pack that has this movie. I expected it to be the original from the 50s but instead got this remake. Well... it's a campy bad movie but surprisingly not as annoying it could have been. Something about the vibe was fun enough to not be too boring. Giant Daryl Hannah is nice to look at, and Daniel Baldwin is having at least a little bit fun performing the boyfriend/husband/whatever guy he is.

The only thing I was disappointed there was not horror at all. The giant girl doesn't do much rampaging you would expect from this kind of movie. I guess there was no budget to destroy buildings. However, it's not a very long movie, so it's easy to watch if you want something weird.

Attack of the 50 Ft. Woman (1993)

** (out of 4)

Remake of the 1958 cult classic has Darryl Hannah playing a smart woman who constantly allows herself to be taken advantage of. Her father uses her for her money while her no good husband (Daniel Baldwin) is constantly cheating on her with some trash from their town. After an encounter with a spaceship, the wife grows fifty feet and plans on setting everything straight. This isn't a "so bad it's good" movie like the original. It's not really bad but it's not really good either so in the end I must say that the film comes off as a disappointment because there's so much they could have done with the story but in the end they ended up doing very little. The funny side of the actual story could have made a good comedy but the film really comes off as lazy and not trying to get any laughs. The entire movie seems more interested in trying to develop characters and one has to ask themselves why. Do we really want to see the sad Hannah rise up (not that way) and overcome the tragedy in her life? Do we care that her mom was a nut? Why the filmmakers decided to add this type of thing or the shady deals of her father is beyond me but it really takes away from the sci-fi aspects of the film. The special effects are pretty lazy as well as are the performances. Hannah doesn't do too bad of a job but she certainly can't compare to the original film's star. Baldwin adds very little as the jerk husband. There are a few nods to the original film as well as Arkoff and Corman but the film needed a lot more of this and a lot less of the character development.

HBO Films produces some of the finest made for TV films ever made but that view can not apply for this 1993 release starring Daryl Hannah in the title role originally portrayed by Allison Hayes in a 1958 drive in theater cult classic of the same name. The story about an abused housewife (Hannah) whose close encounter with an UFO causes her to become a giant is something that should not have been tackled by HBO Films. Fortunately, Hannah followed up this dreadful lead with a good supporting part in the theatrical hit film "Grumpy Old Men."

I haven't seen the original; I can imagine that it isn't as feminist as, or at least less overtly so than, this. Guest gets the tone, and this largely delivers what it promises. I know he can direct something hilarious, since I've seen Best in Show; this doesn't have the benefits of a cast full of proved comedic talent, and the writing is inferior, though not without chuckle-inducing moments. There are a couple of lines that are downright quotable. You probably know the plot already; Daniel Baldwin, a bastard merely by virtue of the fact that he's cheating on Darryl Hannah(even if the squeeze he found is also a sight for sore eyes), and several others (all male) talk down to her, and once she begins to grow in size, she attempts to exact vengeance upon them. The FX are cheesy, dated and obvious, and I would wager this was an intentional decision. This is both a spoof and an homage. There is brief suspense. The characters and acting aren't half bad. There is some sexuality(and eye-candy) and brief nudity in this. The DVD comes with a theatrical trailer. I recommend this to fans of the concept. 5/10

A smartly feminist reading of the 1958 camp classic is the basis of this made-for-TV remake which needlessly opens up the proceedings by adding some 25 minutes of “character development” – which, basically, means new personalities who further traumatize or assist the distressed titular female. Daryl Hannah has trouble coping with the ugly duckling part of the story but grows nicely into her role once the gigantic transformation comes along and in which she is curiously but attractively decked out in cavewoman garb!

Excepting the rather obnoxious Daniel Baldwin (as Hannah’s philandering husband), the rest of the cast is capable enough: Frances Fisher is Hannah’s helpful shrink, William Windom is her greedy tycoon father and, best of all, Cristi Conaway is Baldwin’s sexy mistress who practically changes to a more outrageous wig with every new scene she’s in; I knew nothing of her going in but, being sufficiently impressed I looked up her resume' on IMB and, what do you know, she was once married to an actor of presumably Maltese origins named Salvator Xuereb!!

This is all well and good, perhaps, but I still wouldn’t say that this is an improvement on the unjustly maligned original; for one thing, there are no giant aliens to be seen here and, worse still, the goofy fat deputy is (predictably, under the circumstances) replaced by a squeaky, tomboyish girl. The sheriff and his deputy are here depicted as being avid drive-in cinema-goers and, at one point, Hannah rips off the roof of a cinema which is screening the 1958 original! The new coda is also quite amusing: having been received inside the spaceship which caused her enormous growth, Hannah is joined by two other gigantic beauties who, sure enough, look upon their tiny hubbies as they go confessing to their various infidelities in interstellar group therapy!