La guerra dei mutanti

At the dawn of the direct to video market, Tim Kincaid took a break from making pornography to try his hand at being Ed Wood (who, come to think of it, also made pornography). Anyway, a couple of his efforts, "Breeders" and "Bad Girls Dormitory", have left a lasting impression with - well- the sort of people who watch that sort of movie.

This movie can be best compared to Kincaid's other movie "Robot Holocaust", his attempt at a post-apocalyptic action film. However, whereas the latter is so hilariously bad that it's fun to watch even without the MST3K comments, this movie is just bad in a lame 80's sort of way - right down to the pounding synthesizer soundtrack that has you wondering when the aerobics class is going to start.

Yes, there are a few comically bad scenes. For example, why does a "mercenary" adorn his apartment with every weapon every made - except a loaded gun? But they're few and far between. Mostly, it's just boring.

Not worth the time, even to make fun of it.

The film was created on next to no budget by an infamous director/writer/producer of adult pornography. Watching the fashion and mustaches on the male cast that last thing might not be that much of a surprise but what surprises me the most is the ego of the production team. If you have no money and hardly any skills in filmmaking then you might get away with creating a sleazy slasher at most. This film takes it inspiration from epic films like Bladerunner but fails fails in nearly every department, fails HARD. Awful settings, uninspired wardrobes (except for Domina's), no logical plot, weird fight scenes, laughable "inventions" and utterly useless cyborgs that look like failed EBM musicians and act like stiff zombies.

Bladerunner had its following of low-budget cyberpunk copycats and a lot of them actually succeeded with delivering a somewhat engaging story (Robotrix for instance) so this film can't really get away with it just because of finances. If I were to cut it some slacks then it has to be the effect and gore. I am especially thinking about the decaying cyborgs that are skillfully done with both stop-motion and makeup.

Some claim this is a BLADE RUNNER ripoff but I know the truth. In the distant future, failed filmmaker Ridley Scott built a time machine and decided to go back in time to film MUTANT HUNT, what many in this future consider the greatest film of all-time, before it is actually made. His plan worked and BLADE RUNNER hit in 82 while MUTANT HUNT's legacy was muted because it was seen a ripoff.

Seriously, what can one say about this classic? It is indicative of a cinematic time long gone, the era of cheapo sci-fi flicks shot in abandoned warehouses (the future!) on a 5-day shooting schedule (see also: Ray, Fred Olen). I'm glad to know that in the future cyborgs will be modeled after the band Devo. Tim Kincaid directs this as flatly as possible. I love the fight in Riker's apartment where the girls just sit and stand there. I also love the bit where the robot begins to severe its left hand. When the filmmakers cut to the hand hanging in the cuff, it is a right hand! And who can ever forget the couple making out in the alley? Awesome. To the film's credit, Ed French's cyborg puppet head is pretty impressive and actually emotes better than 3/4 of the cast. After watching this 75 minute insanity fest, the only natural thing to ask is, "What Kincaid film should I watch next?"

Mutant Hunt is about some alien virus infecting these cyborgs and then everything becomes meaningless. I'm jumping on the bandwagon in terms of agreement upon the film's retardation. The story is non-sensical, the fights are just so dildo-like, the acting is trying and embarrassingly failing and so forth. But to hell with y'all, I like this piece of moronic $#!+. Why? I just have an affinity for stupid z-movie cyberpunk movies. So up yours.

It's cheap and cheesy genre time with the no-talent independent filmmaker, who stumbles his way through this supposed "Blade Runner" riff. In the "future", mutant cyborgs are being injected with a special drug by evil, world domination minded scientist Z (Bill Peterson). The only man who can even try to put an end to Z's diabolical plan is mercenary / mutant hunter for hire Matt Riker (Rick Gianasi). Of course, Matt will get by with a little help from his friends, Johnny Felix (Ron Reynaldi) and Elaine Eliot (Taunie Vrenon).

The special effects and makeup are, surprisingly, not that bad, all things considered. Ed French created a puppet cyborg head that is pretty cool - and which does give the best performance in the movie! Everyone else is varying degrees of dull. Thankfully, the attractive female cast makes things worth enduring, especially Ms. Vrenon, who has an alternate job as an exotic dancer. The insistent pop music score helps to move things along adequately, no matter if the bulk of this production is inept from beginning to end. The fight scenes are somewhat less than exciting, and not exactly directed with much zeal. Kincaids' script is talky and inane.

Of course, who chooses to watch something titled "Mutant Hunt" and expects anything different? Truth be told, this viewer would still rather watch stuff like this than a lot of the mega budget crud churned out by Hollywood. At only 74 minutes long, this harmless bit of nonsense goes on no longer than it should.

Five out of 10.