Bambola meccanica mod. Cherry 2000

I can't fathom it.

I don't like either lead actor. The effects are cheesy and below "The A Team." The film doesn't paint in broad strokes; its message is slopped on with push brooms.

But doggone, I get a kick out of this thing everytime it airs.

Maybe it's the handful of stars and almost stars and the games of "Holy Cow! That's where they were then." Marshall Bell, Pamela Gidley, Griffith herself.

Maybe it's the camp, as if the producers knew that a Bruckheimeran picture was beyond them, so they reveled in their low budget and milked everything to the point that teenage boys (my age when I first saw it) can't quite be sure if this is straight or tongue-in-cheek. (The Self-Actualized Nazis of Zone 7, with their proto-New Age totalitarianism are a hoot. Give them more lines!)

It defies explanation, and I suppose it's the mystery that keeps me tuning in.

"Cherry 2000" was a huge commercial failure and it's hardly ever mentioned today, but I found it surprisingly entertaining. Sure, the script is unimaginative and the film has no real vision and the action scenes are strictly routine, but the two leads are enormously, effortlessly likable. They make a deeply sweet pair. Maybe the film should have concentrated more on their love story and less on the familiar action aspects of the story. And the violence of a couple of scenes seems rather out of place. But even with its weaknesses, this movie is, fitfully, absorbing and very entertaining.

I will not attempt to describe this movie. It would be fruitless. You may at first be frustrated by the seemingly inept invocation of all the tried and true cliches of the "genre" - from Mad Max to its weirder post-apocalyptic cousins. But this is not Circuitry Man in reverse - it is much, much stranger. By the time the polka-dotted bikini-wearing ex-girlfriend of the hero is playing hostess at the disney-esque bubble-dome camp of the desert-dwelling homicidal outlaw gang... oh, never mind. By the way, Melanie Griffith was much better looking before lip surgery. Almost hot, in fact. But rest assured, this is a work of genius, exposing a deep understanding of the rift between genders during the height of the supposedly post-sexual-liberation 1980's, an almost sublime sense of humor about sexual alienation and most of all, the erotic link between women and cars in American culture is finally completely laid bare.

In fact, this movie is so profoundly subversive that it could only be made under cover of shlock. Do not be fooled by what seems like coke-addled acting and tourette-syndrome editing. This film is high art. Especially the part where the robot says "is that your hand?" Stay up late and watch it on TBS tonight! And take notes!

This is the kind of film that gets under your skin. One of a small subgenre of Sci-Fi Westerns, its small flashes of inspired writing make it worth watching some night when there's nothing else to do. Cameron Milzer is particularly notable as a blackly comedic psycho-girlfriend, but Tim Thomerson and Melanie Griffith are no slouches themselves. Pleasant bleak visuals and an interesting score from Basil Poledouris (Robocop, Hunt For Red October, & the Conan films, as well as 60 other movies) make for a modest repeat viewability factor. Fun and stupid!

When I first saw this movie I was hooked. I watched it many times and I still find new things. It grows on you. Really good cast and storyline. Watch it! Pamely Gidley is just superduper and the settings are like the Wild Wild West!