Missione antidroga

My review was written in May 1987 after a Cannes Film Festival Market screening.

"Feel the Heat" is an unabashed action showcase for oriental actress Tiana Alexandra, wife of film's scripter Stirling Silliphant. Previously seen in TWE's exercise video the "Karatix", Alexandra is a real looker, solid martial arts practitioner and the only reason to sit through this weak programmer.

With apologies to Whoopi, Alexadra stars as Checkers Goldberg, a government narcotics agent working for David Dukes, who is sent undercover to Buenos Aires to infiltrate Rod Steiger's drug ring. She poses in outrageous Suzie Wong slit dresses as a bubble-headed dancer, immediately turns Steiger on and stumbles upon the secret of the smuggling operation. It turns out (believe it or not) that Steige4r has $500,000 of heroin surgically implanted in his dancers' breasts unbeknownst to them, and sends them to America where silicone is substituted for the smack. Alexandra dutifully goes along with the gag in hopes that boss Dukes will arrive in the nick of time before her cover is blown, i.e., before Steiger and his doctor discover she already has a massive chest hidden under those tight-fitting gowns.

This nonsense is just an excuse for all-purpose chase scenes and shootouts, plus Alexandra kicking into submission various thugs, even felling the massive former wrestler Professor Toru Tanaka. She's alluring and sports a perky personality, but hubby Silliphant's klutzy script sinks the outing. It's hard to believe the writer of "Narcissus on a Red Fire Engine" for tv's "Route 66" seri4es and a horde of other interesting shows and pics penned the dumb puns and vulgarities here.

Dukes, Steiger and the supporting cast have little to do.

If it were not for spunky heroine, "Checkers Goldberg", played by Tiana Alexander, "Catch the Heat" could be dismissed as just another mindless shoot em up to fill the drive in theaters. Her performance is so upbeat and entertaining however, that it overcomes the "I've seen it all before" plot. The first hour is the best part of "Catch the Heat", with "Checkers" kicking and killing "Professor Toru Tanaka". The late David Dukes is along for the ride as Alexander's partner, but his performance is completely forgettable. The same could be said for Rod Steiger, who plays a geriatric villain. The movie is not to be taken seriously, and comes across as more or less mocking itself. - MERK

A tired-looking Rod Steiger was given top billing for this predictable action movie although his screen time is relatively brief. The story is unoriginal and most of the budget seems to have been spent on an exciting beginning and climax - what comes in between is extremely dull.

Unusually for its day, much of the action is handled by a woman and the film, despite all its faults, is popular amongst femfight devotees for the concluding scenes in which the sinuous but deadly Tiana Alexander, clad in skintight black leotards, uses martial arts to dispose of numerous opponents.

If you're a fan of movies of strong and beautiful women and also enjoy a taste of the 80s, this is a must.

I don't understand all of the negative reviews. This is a typical action flick of its time with nothing at all wrong with it.

Storyline: Undercover police woman has a task to figure out how drug smugglers and murders are getting away with their crimes. There's a nice romance subplot between her and her partner and their growth is endearing.

Tiana Alexandra-Silliphant plays the police woman. It's the only action movie she ever stared in and it's a shame because she's an excellent and realistic martial artist.

What I mean is that unlike other movies where it's kind of obvious the woman would lose the fight in reality, Tiana's fights are believable. And often, the big guy she's fighting overpowers her and her ways of winning the fights are believable.

Quick pros and cons: I really liked how the writers used realistic fight sequences. As a fan of 80s music, that was okay, too.

However, the guns scenes were a bit ridiculous.

Everyone had machine guns and used them like toys. This movie is not a gun movie though.

Every scene with Tiana was charming and her character was adorable and fun. As a fan of movies with women who can fight, you should watch this and you won't be let down. It's free on YouTube. Just look up "Catch the Heat 1984" there. Also, give this a thumbs up if it helped you, or down if you're an Aussie (I know that means "like" to you people).

Yet another of those not so brilliant films about the life of a female cop. This one however, is Chinese but American raised, and she is known as something of a Kung-Fu expert (originality!). Her latest mission is to pretend to be a singer from Hong Kong called Cinderella-Poo (!) in order to infiltrate a gang of drug smugglers who hide their stash in women's breasts and pretending that they're silicon implants (!!). This bizarre plot is further complicated by the fact that one of the criminal gang has been arrested by our heroine before, and shock, horror! Her commanding officer is secretly in love with her! How will all this be resolved? Does anybody care?

Well, 'Feel The Heat' is noteworthy for one thing. It features the worse use of pigeon English I've ever heard, when Miss Poo puts on her act of being an illiterate foreigner for her undercover mission. Nobody with an IQ of more than a single digit would be fooled by this pathetic facade, but these so-called professional crooks fall for it hook, line and sinker. This isn't the only situation where suspension of disbelief is essential, as our 5'5 cop policewoman starts felling huge bad guys with just one kick, and people can run for ages despite being shot in the leg and stomach.

But of course, we can overlook all that nonsense if it was actually entertaining. Sadly, there's nothing here you haven't seen a million times before in better action movies, with budgets of more than a few thousand. The gunfire, the explosions and the martial-arts fights will just inspire a distinct feeling of deja vu which will last till the ending credits roll. I can only recommend it if you've already seen every other movie in the genre ever made. And just how likely is that?! 3/10