Miami Connection

Miami Connection (1987)

* 1/2 (out of 4)

Some college kids from Central Florida not only play in a rock band but they're also masters at martial arts. Good thing for them because one of the members begins dating a girl whose brother just happens to be the leader of a violent motorcycle gang involved in all sorts of illegal activities.

It's strange how movies are usually forgotten only to later be rediscovered for some reason. The history of Miami CONNECTION is pretty fascinating as it pretty much died as soon as it was released and no one even knew about it outside the filmmakers and cast. Twenty-two years later a programmer for the Alamo Drafthouse ended up buying a copy of the film on eBay for $50 and soon he was booking it and out of nowhere a large cult following started. Today, Miami CONNECTIOn has a rather large cult following and it even got a special edition released to DVD and Blu-ray.

So, why do so many awful movies get forgotten and others ones like this end up with a cult following? My only guess is that some movies reach the "so bad they're good" level because the filmmakers went into the project not thinking they were making a low-budget bad movies but instead they go in thinking they're making the next CITIZEN KANE. I'm sure they believe that everything from the acting to the directing to the screenplay is just something special when it fact it's all very, very bad. This film is certainly awful on just about every level from the performances to the incredibly awful rock soundtrack but thankfully there are some moments that are so awful that you can't help but laugh.

There are many highlights (or lowlights depends on how you see it) here including some stereotypes that are just so cringe-worthy that you can't help but laugh. The rock band has different ethnic members but the Asian and black guys are so laughable that you can't help but wonder what they were thinking. The subplot dealing with the black guy not knowing who is father is is just priceless. Another highlight is the over-the-top violence including a "death" scenes towards the end, which has to be one of the funniest ever filmed. I'm not going to ruin what major character it happens to but I dare anyone watch it and not laugh.

Miami CONNECTION is an awful movie, there's no question about it but thankfully there are enough bad moments to make it worth viewing if you're a fan of this type of thing.

Well, the RIFFTRAX versions of this movie are hilarious!

Loyalty. Honesty. We'll stay together through thick or thin. Friends forever, we'll be together. We're on top 'cause we play to win.

The words reverberate through your thoughts, challenging the underlying foundation of your modern day belief system, and make you question existence itself.

Welcome to "Miami Connection".

The films producer, and leading role, YK Kim, was a savvy entrepreneur who enjoyed success in Central Florida in the 80's teaching martial arts. He wrote and co-directed this film on his own dime, and this masterpiece is a shining example of what can be achieved when one knows Tae Kwon Do and is ready for a good time.

It's no secret that 1980's Florida was a haven for cocaine drug trafficking. Hollywood attempted to glorify it with TV shows like Miami Vice, and with films like Scarface. But nothing captures this moment in time and raises a huge independent middle finger to the powers that be in Hollywood like "Miami Connection".

While scholars will argue the misdirection created by the films title, let's once and for all set the tone and clear the air. Bad guys: Miami - Good Guys: Orlando.

It was true then, and it's still true to this day.

To truly understand the gravity this film creates, first one must fully understand the essence of it's main characters.

Dragon Sound is one jam-tastic rock band whose instruments don't match the synthesizer-laden sounds they make (who cares because the 80's were confusing) and throw it down frequently at Central Florida's hottest night club. (at the time I think it is called The Edge, or maybe JJ Whispers). And the bad guys are super upset because the owner of the night club is letting Dragon Sound play instead of their band. Within a few moments of hearing Dragon Sound play, its evidently clear as to why they have been supplanted. Disrupting the bad guys drug trade, as well as everything else is an afterthought. Herein lies the beauty of this masterpiece.

If you are familiar with Orlando, this film will resonate eternal. Church Street, middle of the night, gang fight involving poured beer, taunts, convertibles, and action that gets spilled over onto Magnolia. "That Son of a B! Right There!" Who knew that in the 80's, the owner of Station 441 was a bad dude Korean that wore a Mickey Mouse apron and beat down punks who tried to skip out on their bill? All that's missing is Mama B's!

Its all about a regional bearded crime boss named Jeff, and fingerless gloves, mullets, biker gangs paid in beer, slow motion Bruce Lee sequences , cocaine, shirtless Tae Kwon Do rock bands, tough guys, making dreams come true, aviator shades, borderline racist daddy issues, grape feeding, asking what you have in the bank, "Against the Ninjas" ala Pat Benatar, uninhibited butchering of the English language, Mid-rif t-shirts and Sport Coats, the University of Central Florida, and ninjas on motorcycles blocking your route to the airport.

The musical score really stands out in this movie. One cant help but love the dark wave 80's synthesizers playing out in the train scene.

YK Kim is the 1980's version of Leonardo Da Vinci. "Masterpiece" is a term that barely scrapes the surface. The International Programming Contest results are in! We made fourth place. MAKE SOME NOISE!!!

If you are young, old, male, female, doesn't matter. Stop everything going on in your life. Put it all on pause and prepare yourself for the life changing experience you are about to embark upon...

Miami CONNECTION

When I first saw the trailer for 'Miami Connection," my mind was literally blown. I knew the 1980s was a wasteland of Troma garbage and horrible B films, but this film had something more than your run of the mill awfulness. It was epic. It was beautiful. It was bad 80s pop music, complete with bad feel good lyrics you might see in some TV show, the kind of song a writer comes up with on the spot because that's what they think the "youth" music sounds like. Never mind the bad acting, editing, and overall quality of the film transfer--that was something I was expecting. What I wasn't expecting was the bad after school special side- plots, the rampant homo eroticism, the most bizarre and random gang of thugs ever assembled and the sheer 80s-ness of the film. What I really loved was the over acting by the extras in the film. They must have known that they would never get another chance to be in a film, so they hammed it up for all to see.

Now I will remind you, if you aren't into watching films that are bad enough to make Mystery Science Theater 3000, then you surely will not get the sheer awesomeness of this awful movie. If you like straight comedy or action films, then I suggest you stay away and save your money. As for the rest of us, enjoy.

An incredibly awful movie, but it's awful in the best way possible. Holy cow, do they get everything just perfectly wrong here. The nonsensical plot is as follows: a rock band made up of taekwondo experts (led by director Y.K. Kim) crosses a gang of coke-dealing biker-ninjas ("bikers by day, ninjas by night," as the intro song informs us) and has to fend for their lives. The acting is hilariously bad - one guy clearly keeps turning to read cue cards, for instance. The editing frequently cuts far too soon or lingers on far too long. The glorious 80s music I have already mentioned. There's also a song about how awesome friendship is (the five heroes all live in a house together, go to college together, play in a band and practice taekwondo - which they pronounce tayKWONdo - together) and a song about dancing ninjas. Most of the actors are actually martial artists, but the choreography is stilted (people pause awkwardly with swords to wait to get kicked in the face), and the film goes into slow motion for no reason. It's all very laughable and it moves quickly, which makes it quite watchable. This can be watched on Netflix - nay, must be watched on Netflix.