King Kong 2

Yep. It's a terrible movie, but worth watching for the laughs. When King Kong and Lady Kong first meet, they gaze into each other's eyes - and Pow! It's love at first sight! - and the Love Theme from King Kong Lives starts swelling up in the background - it brought tears to my eyes. Because I was laughing so hard I was close to weeping. This movie goes beyond its weird anthropomorphism and bad writing to achieve an unprecedented new level of cheese.

There are other fun moments, like when Kong starts climbing a mountain that is VERY obviously some painted plywood stuck to the side of a stepladder.

If you feel like watching something silly, or if you want to see a giant monkey trying to get to second base, this movie is for you!

Are you kidding me? This is the sappiest sequel I have ever seen! I thought King Kong has perished from being shot down of The World Trade Center. WRONG! He survived the fall, that left him in a coma for a decade. So what happens next? He gets an artificial heart, and a new mate: Lady Kong. Boy, it doesn't get any better than this. The whole place in Georgia becomes a jungle when these primates get together. Unlike the one made 10 years earlier, this movie goes back to nature in many ways. A zoo that big couldn't hold these two lovebirds. Did I say lovebirds? Hahaha! I did it, again! When the two protectors Hank(Brian Kerwin) and Amy(Linda Hamilton) go to extreme lengths to assure the safety of King and Lady Kong. But there's trouble. The U.S. Army lead by mad Col. Nevitt (John Ashton) will go to full length to neutralize the Kongs. After Hank brings Lady Kong from Borneo, nothing would be the same. When the Army attacked Kong, he turned those tanks and jeeps into broken hunk of junk, and the scene where Kong recovers from his injuries, it was just amazing. Eating the alligators, or better yet, when he ate one of the hunters. But the fun part of the movie I like the most, is when Kong squashed the Col. Like a bug. That one was too silly there. And the really cheesy part of the film is when Kong gets to see his son for the first and last time. This movie didn't do well in the box office, but I think it's great... for a rainy day. Some legends remain to be legends, King Kong could have have more there in this sequel. The problem: IT'S TOO SHORT!

Well, the only thing good in this movie is the split-second flash you get of Linda Hamilton's rack. I don't know who the hell the rest of these people were. There was some blond dufus named "Hank". And a lot of really bad special FX. All in all, it's an awful movie.

But just imagine if it had been made today, it'd have super-slick CGI effects for the monkeys and a sound track by Elton John singing about "shining stars" and hairy monkey suits. Joel Schumacher would direct of course. The female lead would be played by Denise Richards except she wouldn't show her boobs. There'd be long shots of Hank's naked ass several times throughout the movie. Wouldn't it be great?

Er, maybe I'll just watch to 80's version again.

The decidedly crappy reviews heaped on this film were pretty well deserved, though it must be said that there have been much worse insults to filmgoers' intelligence than "King Kong Lives." Linda Hamilton stars as Amy Franklin, head of a scientific team that develops an artificial heart to miraculously keep Kong with us after his famous fall from the New York City skyline. With the help of blood transfused from a newly-discovered Lady Kong, the big guy is soon up and around and eating people again. But this time his true interest lay in his new girlfriend, whom he not-so-subtly rescues from captivity. The hairy couple hope to live happily ever after, but the brutish army and rifle-bearing yokels have other ideas.

It's difficult to pinpoint the biggest fault of "King Kong Lives." Overall, it's pretty ridiculous, from the story to the special effects to the supposedly emotional moments. It's overlong, the dialog could have been written by junior high kids, and the characters, particularly the "bad guys," are so one-dimensional it's not even funny. But if you can accept all of that, you can get at least some entertainment value out of this sequel, though don't expect a so-bad-it's-funny picture.

Taking into consideration that "King Kong Lives" is a movie from the mid-1980s, then it is actually not too bad. Sure, if you compare it with the "King Kong" movies seen today, then this is just utter rubbish and obviously people in animal suits and lousy attempts of blending shot scenes to make it appear like these are in fact massive apes.

But hey, yeah this is a cheesy movie. Of course it is. I mean, this is a 1986 movie about King Kong after all. Of course it reeks of being a campy and cheesy movie. Isn't that the appeal of these older "King Kong" movies?

The storyline is adequate, and actually have more contents to it than the movies of recent years that have King Kong in it. That is kind of odd though, I think, as movies evolve into CGI spectaculars that slack on the storylines.

Sure, it was fun to watch Linda Hamilton and John Ashton stumble about in this movie. Granted, it wasn't stellar performances by either of them, but then again, the contents of the movie weren't exactly all that solid to begin with.

"King Kong Lives" is a watchable movie, for sure. But it was hardly an outstanding movie. Nor is it a movie that has withstood the trials of passing time particularly well, because the effects are horribly outdated.

I believe that if you sit down to watch "King Kong Lives" once, then it is hardly a movie that you will be returning to a second time around.

My rating of directors John Guillermin and Charles McCracken 1986 movie "King Kong Lives" settles on a four out of ten stars.