Classe 1999

I've got a soft spot for sci-fi films that have already passed their sell-by-date—those movies set in a year that is now history to you and I (even more-so if the year forms part of the film's title, like this one): I just love seeing how these cinematic predictions of the future differ from reality.

Class of 1999 is a classic example: according to this film, by the year 1999 gang culture will have reached such a level in the U.S. that certain areas—known as Free Fire Zones—will no longer be protected by the police. Kennedy High School, situated in one such lawless zone, becomes the testing ground for three experimental robot teachers (played by Patrick Kilpatrick, Pam Grier, and John P. Ryan), adapted from military battle droids by unscrupulous MegaTech head honcho Bob Forrest (Stacy Keach).

Recently released from prison, gang-banger Cody Culp (Bradley Gregg) intends to give up his criminal lifestyle, but when the droid teachers begin to revert back to their military programming, dealing with their unruly students using extreme force, he and his gang, the Blackhearts, join forces with their rivals, the Razorheads, to try and stop the killing.

According to director Mark L. Lester (who also directed the superior Class of 1984), late '90s fashion hasn't moved on much from the decade before, the film's youths sporting some truly nasty attire (worst offender being Joshua Jackson as Cody's brother Angel, who wears yellow leggings and matching tunic and has the cheek to tell Cody "Man, you got to think about your image"). Also exhibiting zero sign of taste: Stacy Keach as freaky albino Forrest, whose hairstyle is a cross between a mullet and a rattail, and who wears zombie contact lenses for no apparent reason (I thought he was an albino at first, but his 'tache is black).

This version of 1999 also sees the art of robotics advanced to a level where machines can pass for human, something clearly inspired by James Cameron's The Terminator. As the droid teachers battle Cody and his pals, they shed their skin to reveal powerful weapons, which takes the violence up a notch and allows for some pretty impressive animatronic effects and gloopy cyborg gore, Grier opening up her chest (complete with prosthetic tits), Ryan having his cranium blown off, and Kilpatrick's head reduced to half human, half robot (before having his noggin separated from his body via forklift truck!).

Gloriously daft, a little cheesy at times, a lot cheesy at others, and packed with cartoonish violence, Class of 1999 is great entertainment for fans of exploitative '80s schlock. The fact that its vision of the near future is so wrong is just the icing on the cake.

7.5 out of 10, rounded up to 8 for IMDb.

You don't get any more hammy than this. Amongst all the trash of straight to video releases, you ocassionaly find a concept like this. A guy walks out of prison, and heads back to school to find that cyborg teachers are taking the code of the classroom a little to far. Schools in many American districts are regarded as "Free-fire zones" and the police won't even intervene in the deadly gang warfare that ensues whenever school is not on. No one ever asks "Why do these kids even bother going to school", but at this point, who cares? This is a gritty view of the future, with the kind of ironic humour that has made Verhoeven millions, if he had directed this it would have been the next Robocop. The cast shine with the likes of Malcolm MacDowell, Pam Grier and Stacey Keach and in the leading role is charasmatic Corey Feldman-clone, Bradley Gregg. Everyone is having fun with this movie and it is this attitude that makes it so watchable. A pumping rock soundtrack including Nine Inch Nails debut single pads this out even further. Great lines ooze from the script; I'll leave you with one of my favourites: "I'm going to go waste some teachers. Who's with me!"

In the 1982 cult hit CLASS OF 1984, the teachers were afraid of the pupils...or at least the punk ones. Eight years later, the tables turned with high-tech results.

In-between CLASS OF 1984, a kind of B-movie exploitation film about high school as seen in Orwellian terms, and its "follow-up" (not necessarily a sequel per se), 1990's CLASS OF 1999, the director of both, Mark L. Lester, had made forays into more mainstream film making with the better-than-average 1984 Stephen King adaptation FIRESTARTER, and the 1985 Schwarzenneger opus COMMANDO. Perhaps knowing that he was not ever going to be another Steven Spielberg (which is a fool's errand anyway), Lester decided at the tail end of the Eighties to revisit the high school theme of CLASS OF 1984. Not surprisingly, this meant reviving the same themes of extremely explicit violence, sex, and profuse profanity that characterized his '82 opus.

This time, however, he took it one step further.

The setting is Lincoln High School in the great Emerald City, Seattle. It is a place where even highly trained Seattle cops wouldn't set foot inside. But the new principal of the place, Dr. Miles Langford, portrayed by Malcolm McDowell (known for his role as Alexander DeLarge in director Stanley Kubrick's 1971 classic A CLOCKWORK ORANGE, one of those films that influenced CLASS OF 1984), has found a way to bring law and order and discipline. He has agreed to have a trinity of former military cyborgs serve as "educators". Unsurprisingly, the end result is typically over-the-top ultra-violent mayhem.

Needless to say, with CLASS OF 1999, we're not exactly talking about anything other than a cheesy bit of graphic, pre-CGI high tech violence. Still, Lester manages to get some good performances, not only by McDowell, but also by great actors of the previous two decades such as Stacy Keach, John Ryan, and Pam Grier, who might otherwise have totally embarrassed themselves. And as if that wasn't enough, CLASS OF 1999 manages to reference, among other films, THE ASPHALT JUNGLE, ROBOCOP, ROBOCOP 2, WESTWORLD, and even BLADE RUNNER. What else can it do? It's really nothing more than a higher-than-usually-budgeted violent B-grade film.

That said, as I did with CLASS OF 1984, I am giving CLASS OF 1999 a '7'-it is good for what it is.

I hate the term guilty pleasure when it comes to discussion about movies. I mean if you like a film then why should you feel guilty about it? If you are sensible enough to know that a disregarded film is poor on production and story yet entertains you then that is all there is to it really. One such case for myself is with Class Of 1999, Mark L. Lester's loose sci-fi sequel to his own Class Of 1984. I really couldn't recommend this film to anyone with confidence, I just know that I love it, have done since I rented it out of curiosity on VHS many years ago.

The film basically is set in bad future Seattle where anarchy reins in our schools. So into the mix comes three robot teachers on a secretive trial basis, their form of discipline is tough but appears to be working. But things start to go wrong as the teachers start to revert to their battle droid beginnings and it all spirals out of control as they take on the might of the two warring gangs operating out of Kennedy High School.

Think of it as a mixture of Escape From New York and The Terminator and you will be in the same ball park. Tho for the record this is not even close to being as good as either of those movies. Lester's movie actually, in spite of its reviled reputation, comes with some good acting credentials. Malcolm McDowell, Stacy Keach and Pam Grier are the "name" actors, while Patrick Kilpatrick and the cool Bradley Gregg are familiar faces that have fun with the material. It's violent and sweary and full of cheesy dialogue, and naturally the sci-fi led effects are cheap and in keeping with the budget. It's the sort of film that now would go straight to DVD without so much as a blink of an eye. But once a fan of it, you are always a fan of it, because true love never dies.

Acquired taste? For sure. Coolly anarchic in a B movie way? Definitely. So "jump me in, jump me in now". 8/10

In 1999 (I think) things have gotten so bad that as a last resort, robots have been brought in to teach students. This is all thanks to Bob Forrest (Stacy Keach) who hopes that he can sell his robots to other problem ridden schools, however when the robots (John P. Ryan, Pam Grier and Patrick Kilpatrick) starting killing students for being late and start pitting gangs against each other, it's up to Cody (Bradley Gregg) to reunite the gangs and waste the "George Jetson nightmare!" Also the robots have killed his brothers and kidnapped his girlfriend Kristi (Traci Lin) so Cody's looking for revenge in this exciting and admittedly silly actioner. There are few genres that amuse me more than deadly teachers whipping bad kids in shape. The Principal, Substitute movies and so forth are sources of guilty pleasures, Class 99 is no different, since the androids are played by cool actors such as John P. Ryan, Pam Grier and Patrick Kilpatrick. The teenagers themselves don't really convince as punks but there is lots of action and it's all directed with the most possible gore, this was after all from Mark L. Lester (Commando and Showdown In Little Tokyo) so despite the obvious fact that this movie is even more poorly made than it's own sequel (Which stars Kickboxer 2's Sasha Mitchell) the fact is that this far more entertaining and is perfect for those who hate teenagers and want to see them get disposed of in the most grisly way. I for one find that to be great entertainment.

3/5 Matt Bronson