Il duro del Road House

Love it. No idea why but I keep coming back. Utter cheese but Swayze is awesome.

I love this movie. Why? Because it's sooo bad it's good. It dosen't

take itself too seriously (for the most part) but the lines really put

this one over the edge. "It's gonna get worse before it get's better"

""Be nice until it's time to not be nice" and "Oh baby, your gonna

be my regular Saturday night thing!" are classics of bad cinema.

The characters? All one dimensional hillbillies. The acting? Awful.

The plot? Yeah right. This movie is great because you can't take

your eyes away. What cheesy line comes next? When's the next

fight? And Who's the hot blonde? A guilty pleasure through and

through but it is fun sitting around with a bunch of guys watching

this and laughing your ass off. A great guy movie. Recommended.

The dialog, story and acting in this are so cliched that I believe it is a parody of action movies. Others believe it is a straight action movie gone horribly wrong. Whatever the intentions, this movie is very entertaining and very, very stupid. I love it, superior in every way to Sophie's Choice.

It was the Summer of 1989. The biggest movies in Hollywood's arsenal, all in one fiery season: "Batman", "Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade", "Ghostbusters II", "Lethal Weapon 2", "Star Trek V", "License to Kill" and .... "Road House"? You read that right.

Patrick Swayze stars as Dalton, the (second) best cooler in the business, who's charged with cleaning up The Double Deuce, the seediest honky-tonk bar in Jasper, MO. But things don't go so smoothly when Dalton crosses the town's self-appointed ruler, Brad Wesley (Ben Gazzara, better known as Evil Ben Gazzara). He's paid off the Sheriff, so Evil Ben Gazzara is pretty much the town's law and order. He's not pleased with the Double Deuce's burgeoning prosperity, so he makes things tricky for Dalton. But as we learned in "Dirty Dancing", nobody puts Dalton in the corner.

Fifteen minutes into the film, it becomes obvious (by just the dialogue) that this is a tongue-in-cheek enterprise. Any illusions that this will be a thought-provoking story about a philosophical bouncer in a rough town go right out the window (average viewer: "well, this oughta be a fun ride!"). Even Swayze (behind that cool stare) knows this movie is ridiculous - and that's exactly where the entertainment value kicks into high gear.

Consider what this film has going for it:

• Swayze at his sinewy, mulleted peak

• Bar fights

• Monster trucks

• A gaggle of shapely ladies

• Steamy farmhouse sex

• Sam Elliott

• Shootouts

• Sweaty martial arts

• Male bonding that borders on homoerotic

• Crackling dialogue ("Do you enjoy pain?" ... "Pain don't hurt")

• Stuffed polar bear attacks

The entertainment value of "Road House" is simply off the charts. Where else would you find a bouncer with an NYU degree (in philosophy!) and the brooding intensity to nail the town doctor (the smoldering Kelly Lynch) AND forcefully remove a man's throat from his neck? Nowhere, sir! It is escapist entertainment of the highest order, in all its gratuitous violence.

And let us not criticize the film's message. If you have feet and fists of fury, you CAN conquer a small town in Midwestern America. But simply putting a man through a table or a window is not enough. I would say maybe ten or fifteen should do it.

I do have one beef. For a movie to feature Keith David in the opening credits, and only give that man one speaking line is morally reprehensible. But there were boobies, so I think we can let this one slide.

7.5/10

"Road House" tells the story of Dalton, a "cooler" who is hired by the owner of a small town dive bar in Jasper, MO. Dalton is hired to clean up the bar, as it has devolved into a very dangerous establishment. This place is so dangerous and rowdy that the house band plays behind a cage and the wait staff regularly engages in brawls with the patrons. This story used one of the common Western film tropes-- a new Sheriff is hired and brought in to clean up the town. That is essentially Dalton's role in this film. He's kind of the Gordon Ramsey of the bar scene. He's brought in to clean things up and kick out the riff raff. And boy is there a lot of riff raff to clean up.

The conflict in "Road House" is that there is a gang, led by Brad Wesley (Ben Gazzara) whose entire MO it seems is to intimidate the local business people into giving them money and favors in exchange for not being beat up or having their businesses destroyed - an old fashioned protection racket if you follow the 1930s B films. Most of the town (including law enforcement!) is scared of Wesley and his gang and the group pretty much has full run of everything--including the bar where Dalton is hired. Wesley and his gang begin to resent Dalton's presence, because he isn't a pushover and isn't letting them have control.

Much of the action of the film involves Dalton fighting Wesley and his gang of ruffians. Wade Garrett (Sam Elliott), Dalton's friend and mentor, who also works as a cooler at another club/bar, arrives in town to help out his friend. Together, Wade and Dalton try to take on Wesley. And of course, because this is Patrick Swayze, there is a love story intertwined, when he hooks up with his ER surgeon (Kelly Lynch).

The bar scenes are crazy. A lot of nudity, fighting, violence, everything. The opening scene melee resembles the wild saloon fight in "Dodge City" or "Blazing Saddles." Jeff Healy plays the lead singer/guitarist of the house band, and they're fantastic. I especially loved their cover of The Doors' "Roadhouse Blues."

Anyway. If you're adverse to movies with violence (including a particularly spectacular Rambo-esque turn for Swayze near the end of the film), nudity, and language, then this film isn't for you. But, if you're interested in a ridiculous trashy movie, with great music, then this is worth a watch.