Mr. No Legs

Let Mr. No Legs be a source of inspiration for all of us. Not because he's a relentless one-man killing squad, of course, but because he's the living proof that you can still chase your dreams and realize your ambitions even if you're physically disabled… Yeah right, enough with this rubbish! "The Amazing Mr. No Legs" is a totally demented – in idea as well as execution – exploitation feature with a premise that is unique and refreshing and production values looking so cheap and amateurish that you simply have to show admiration for the cast and crew. If you just imagine what these guys could have accomplished if they had a proper budget at their disposal. The titular anti-hero controls the complete drug-business of a major town and acts as judge, jury and especially executioner whenever someone screws up or tries to double-cross him. Although he hasn't got any legs (duh!), everyone fears and obeys Mr. No Legs because he's merciless, is an expert in martial arts and drives around in a heavily armored wheelchair. When the sister of a dedicated cop gets killed in a drug execution it means the start of a devastating war between the good cops, the bad drug deals…and everyone in between. The script is surprisingly convoluted and well written, but those are not the main reasons why this film will stick to your memory. It has girl-on-girl bar fights, wild shootouts, bad acting, sword fights, odd cars and virulent chases and much more. "The Amazing Mr. No Legs" is extremely violent, but never actually shocking since the effects and stunts aren't exactly convincing. Some people might take offense upon seeing the fighting sequences involving the handicapped lead character, but then again, I don't suppose easily offended people are likely to put "Mr. No Legs" on their Christmas list. The slow-motion sequence where actor Ted Vollrath demonstrates his genuine martial arts skills is literally jaw-dropping. Ever seen a guy with no legs kick someone repeatedly in the stomach? No legs!! The titular ought to be considered as one of the greatest cult icons ever: a truly menacing, bad to the bone and self-reliable villain. "Mr. No Legs" is not an easy movie to come across, but definitely worth the search.

This is indeed a bizarre action film shot entirely in Florida about Richard Jaeckel and Ron Slinker as cops who investigate a drug smuggling ring that may have ties to the police department itself. The anti-villain in the film is a wheelchair-bound assassin named No Legs who actually has shotguns built onto the arms of the chair and shoots anyone that gets in his way. It's pretty silly for the most part, but we do have cameos by John Agar as the shady police captain, Lloyd Bochner as the criminal mastermind behind the operation, and Rance Howard and Luke Halpin as Bochner's flunkies. There's also a lengthy car chase to close the film courtesy of Joie Chitwood and the Danger Angels.

This is not the hilarious, silly exploitation freak-show that the distributor of this decent crime thriller would have you believe. The actual title of the film is "Gun Fighter," and not the silly "Mr. No Legs." The story involves a drug smuggling ring down in Florida, where corruption and disloyalty runs rampant. There is a guy they call 'No Legs,' who is anything but a clown being played for laughs. He is actually a sadistic assassin, who seems to derive great pleasure out of torturing and killing whoever gets in his way. He has these automatic machine guns built into the arms of his wheelchair, and the whole thing is quite surreal and over-the-top. The guy reminded me of Dennis Hopper as Frank Booth from "Blue Velvet;" yes, he was that ruthless and deranged. In fact he is kind of a sick bastard. I notice a lot of people search out this oddball film, hoping for some laughs, but it isn't nearly as silly as the packaging suggests. What you will get instead, is a mildly interesting crime thriller about a drug smuggling deal that goes wrong. Most of the acting was pretty decent, and it was nice to see the familiar faces of Lloyd Bochner and Beau Hopkins in such an obscure production. I do think it's a shame that the distributor felt the need to re-name it with such a silly title. If they used the real title, "Gun Fighter," it might have reached a larger audience. Recommended for fans of 70's crime films and oddball Grindhouse productions..

Screenwriter Jack Cowden came up with a great gimmick for this otherwise routine exploitation-action flick, which receives decent-enough direction from Ricou Browning, the man best known for playing the Creature from the Black Lagoon. It's full of consistently amusing stuff that makes it good entertainment for an hour and a half, including that classic cliche, the bar room brawl, and a scene where various thugs try to take out our title character and fail spectacularly.

Korean War veteran Ted Vollrath plays the role, and indeed, he was a paraplegic whose legs had to be amputated after he sustained serious wounds during the war. Fred / "Mr. No Legs" is the principal enforcer for a drug kingpin named D'Angelo (Lloyd Bochner, "The Lonely Lady"), and he has NOT let his disabilities get him down; rather, he's proficient at martial arts, and has a shotgun-equipped wheelchair, to boot. Two police detectives, played by Richard Jaeckel ("Grizzly") and wrestler Ron Slinker, in his only movie role, determine to take down D'Angelos' organization.

Other familiar faces such as Rance Howard ("Chinatown"), Luke Halpin ('Flipper'), and John Agar ("Tarantula") turn up in this agreeably silly and lively trash flick. The filmmaking is overall on the crude side, but Browning does know how to deliver a solid action climax as Jaeckel and Slinker and various incompetent cops pursue one of the antagonists. Due to the fact that we have a couple of familiar and reliable character actors in this thing, the acting is definitely a bit better than one might ordinarily have to tolerate. It's a hoot to see these guys here; Jaeckel and Slinker have a fairly good chemistry.

"Mr. No Legs" does get off to a great, hilarious start early on with a ridiculous fight scene playing out behind the opening credits. And it remains watchable throughout, with violence aplenty and some good laughs to be had.

Seven out of 10.

Ron Slinker, wherever you are, whatever you are doing right now, you are my new action adventure movie hero. This movie is one of the most amazingly endearing and delightfully stupid exercises in brain dead cult mayhem ever created and sooo badly deserves a chance to see light of day on a DVD re-issue. If only for the sheer number of people who would potentially be offended by it's gleeful, off the wall willingness to go beyond the constraints of good taste and show us things that will boggle the mind.

What is even more mind boggling is the array of talent behind the production: POINT BLANK's Lloyd Bochner returns as another suave, scuzzy mob boss; THE DIRTY DOZEN's Richard Jaeckel is well-cast as a police detective with a pre-LETHAL WEAPON juggernaut of destruction as a partner; B-movie legend John Agar is almost unrecognizable as the corrupt police captain who tries to undermine their investigation into a slough of mysterious heroin related deaths; writer Jack Cowden was one of the creators of the long-running TV show "Flipper"; and director Ricou Browning was not only the former swimming star inside the rubber suit of THE CREATURE FROM THE BLACK LAGOON & it's sequels, but was the Director of Underwater Photography & Effects from the James Bond thrillers THUNDERBALL and it's unofficial remake, NEVER SAY NEVER AGAIN, as well as similar work on "Flipper", "Sea Hunt", and the bizarre cult item SUB-A-DUB-DUB.

But the real talent on display in this film is Ron Slinker's "Mr. No Legs", a mob enforcer who's confinement to a wheelchair is no obstacle to his ambition to rule the smack trade in whatever port town this movie was filmed in. By the tacky polyester lounge suits, side-burned hair cuts and bell bottomed pants my guess on the year of production is 1978, and I can almost see the look of bewilderment that must have crossed the faces of the distribution execs who were shown the final product, which then lingered on the shelf until 1981 for whatever reason. Put it this way: The film is un-releasable by today's standards. It is racially insensitive, dares to have fun with the idea of a mob hit-man who is a paraplegic, and couldn't give a flying hoot what anyone thinks about it. This movie is the stuff of legends and inspires thoughts like how was it allowed to be made?? Or more accurately, who on Earth would have thought this movie was a good idea?? As others have summed up, the plot is a basic police procedural investigation into the death of a couple peripherally involved in the heroin trade, peppered by what would otherwise be the usual shootouts, fistfights, rubouts, car chases and hardboiled discussion scenes such material usually involves. What makes the movie special is No Legs, a cold, remorseless killer armed with double barreled shotguns fixed to the arm rests of his wheelchair, Ninja throwing stars on the wheel hubs, and in the peak of legless physical perfection due to his rigorous exercise routines that buxom blond bombshell mob molls watch with drooling desire. He may have lost his walking legs, but he's still a Mack Daddy Hustla Pimp who can satisfy the ladies.

Two scenes in the film stand out: The first an otherwise ordinary bar fight which Jaeckel's partner interrupts. Basically every low life in the joint turns on the doughty young thickly mustachioed and side-burned lounge suit wearing cop, and by golly if he doesn't wipe the floor with them in one of the most improbable outbursts of fighting skills ever staged. What makes it even more remarkable is just as the first punches are thrown Jaeckel senses something is wrong and follows his buddy into the bar, only arriving there after 10 minutes of non-stop head cracking action. That must have been one hell of a big parking lot.

The other scene is the film's tour-de-force set piece where SIX (6) mob toughs turn on Mr. No Legs as he relaxes by the pool with his sex bomb mob moll, and with a combination of legless martial arts, various underwater fighting maneuvers and assorted hidden weapons, he smacks them all down: Watching Mr. Slinker do Jedi back flips in his chair and beat down on the bad guys with the stumps of his lower appendages is not something you will soon forget. I agree with others when stating that this movie needed more No Legs and less police procedural: The squandered opportunity of a sequel examining how No Legs arrived at his legless state, came to grips with his disabilities and got his start as a hit-man is one of the great lost cult gems that was never made. This will have to do, and if you can find it you'll be an instant convert.

To avoid any confusion let me make clear that this film is an exercise in applied bad taste made long before the term "political correctness" was even coined. It also succeeds because the story is played completely straight without any sort of schlock regarding No Legs: If it had been a smarmy tongue in cheek parodic or satiric attempt to get laughs it would have fallen flat. It is ridiculous, absurd and potentially offensive, but the film has a kind of lunkheaded endearing naiveté about it that makes it all ten times the riot it would otherwise have been if played for laughs. You just can't make 'em like this anymore, and thank heaven for that.

9/10: I could see Mondo Macabro picking this one up, they have shown a willingness to present movies on DVD that other companies would never dare bother with, and I for one would love to see a re-release just because I know how many stupid Liberal idiots would protest it.