55 recensioni
"The Nail Gun Massacre" is everything it sounds like—a psychopath is roaming the backwoods of Texas with a souped-up nail gun, turning men and women into human pincushions. Could it be related to a brutal rape that occurred some six months prior? An obvious riff in title on "The Texas Chain Saw Massacre" and boasting an opening rape scene unabashedly culled from "I Spit on Your Grave," "The Nail Gun Massacre" is an unabashedly derivative mid-80s riff on slasher conventions, pulled together on a shoestring budget.
As bad as it sounds, I feel that this film has gotten a lot of heat from web critics who aren't really taking it on its own terms—this is not Bergman, Tarkovsky, or Kubrick—it isn't high art. It's a film whose singular distinguishing element is that its killer's weapon of choice is a nail gun. My point being, "The Nail Gun Massacre" doesn't claim to be anything other than what it is, and most horror audiences (especially those who have a taste for these older exploitation films) should know this.
That aside, the film is not a technical masterpiece by any stretch of the imagination. The murder scenes are surprisingly better than one would expect given the shoestring budget, and never cease to be elaborate or grotesque. A pulsing synth score accompanies most of the scenes, and is admittedly a bit overbearing, while the killer hurls goofy one-liners at the victims in an inexplicable robot voice. The acting overall is bad, but passable by eighties slasher standards. Most of the men are buffoons, and the women prancing around naked. In spite of those caveats though, the film does capture the quiet backwoods of Texas rather effectively, and it is an extremely atmospheric film given all of its shortcomings. The photography of the woods captures a strange foreboding that, whether intentional or just a happy accident, is far more nuanced than anything else about the film.
All in all, "The Nail Gun Massacre" is, at least as far as eighties slashers go, not nearly as bad of a film as some may lead you to believe. It's schlocky, gratuitous, and at times badly acted, but isn't that what we love these films for? It at least has the distinguishing feature of a nail gun- obsessed killer, and it also excels at capturing the dreariness of sleepy backwoods Texas, which is more than one would necessarily expect. 5/10.
As bad as it sounds, I feel that this film has gotten a lot of heat from web critics who aren't really taking it on its own terms—this is not Bergman, Tarkovsky, or Kubrick—it isn't high art. It's a film whose singular distinguishing element is that its killer's weapon of choice is a nail gun. My point being, "The Nail Gun Massacre" doesn't claim to be anything other than what it is, and most horror audiences (especially those who have a taste for these older exploitation films) should know this.
That aside, the film is not a technical masterpiece by any stretch of the imagination. The murder scenes are surprisingly better than one would expect given the shoestring budget, and never cease to be elaborate or grotesque. A pulsing synth score accompanies most of the scenes, and is admittedly a bit overbearing, while the killer hurls goofy one-liners at the victims in an inexplicable robot voice. The acting overall is bad, but passable by eighties slasher standards. Most of the men are buffoons, and the women prancing around naked. In spite of those caveats though, the film does capture the quiet backwoods of Texas rather effectively, and it is an extremely atmospheric film given all of its shortcomings. The photography of the woods captures a strange foreboding that, whether intentional or just a happy accident, is far more nuanced than anything else about the film.
All in all, "The Nail Gun Massacre" is, at least as far as eighties slashers go, not nearly as bad of a film as some may lead you to believe. It's schlocky, gratuitous, and at times badly acted, but isn't that what we love these films for? It at least has the distinguishing feature of a nail gun- obsessed killer, and it also excels at capturing the dreariness of sleepy backwoods Texas, which is more than one would necessarily expect. 5/10.
- drownsoda90
- 29 set 2016
- Permalink
- daniel-mannouch
- 14 set 2018
- Permalink
Every horror collector worth their salt will at least have heard of The Nail Gun Massacre. It's such a tempting title isn't it? I finally gave in and bought the special edition DVD. This film is one big mess from start to finish, but you already knew that. The most interesting thing in it was breasts, big huge breasts at that! One woman has breasts so big that they're all you (and the cameraman) can focus on. The biggest problem with Nail Gun Massacre is that you can't really hear what anyone is saying, making it hard to follow. Every time someone speaks there's a horrible noise that sounds like a passing train. Perhaps this was to cover the bad acting? If anything they should have removed it and let the actors do their thing, no matter how untalented they are. At least we can laugh at them then! The sound is atrocious, half the time the background noise is louder than what people are saying. You also can't hear the supposedly "funny" lines from the killer, as the voice is too distorted.
It does have it's good moments though. You can't help but laugh at such an inept film, with scenes such as a couple 'doing it' against a tree, where all you can see is the mans white ass jiggling around. The best part for me was when the killer says to the big breasted woman: "Get inside, big tits!" And there's another hilarious scene where a woman gets hysterical and says "I'm gonna die, I know I'm gonna die!" I would say the film was worth watching just for those two scenes!
For a low budget "so bad it's good" film, The Nail Gun Massacre is nothing special. There's other low budget films that are much funnier such as The Suckling and They Don't Cut The Grass Anymore (the acting is worse than Nail Gun Massacre, yet more hilarious).
It does have it's good moments though. You can't help but laugh at such an inept film, with scenes such as a couple 'doing it' against a tree, where all you can see is the mans white ass jiggling around. The best part for me was when the killer says to the big breasted woman: "Get inside, big tits!" And there's another hilarious scene where a woman gets hysterical and says "I'm gonna die, I know I'm gonna die!" I would say the film was worth watching just for those two scenes!
For a low budget "so bad it's good" film, The Nail Gun Massacre is nothing special. There's other low budget films that are much funnier such as The Suckling and They Don't Cut The Grass Anymore (the acting is worse than Nail Gun Massacre, yet more hilarious).
A nice little independent film from Texas? Not even close. Some guy named Terry Lofton wrote the story, screenplay, also directed and even had a bit part in his little movie, about an embittered construction worker who goes around with the title weapon, blasting people who raped a woman in opening moments of the film. The killings should provide you with the best laughs of your life. The gun makes some sort of machine gun noise, and we always see the nails AFTER they have entered the victim's body, never flying thru the air and then hitting them. One dude takes one in the privates, a couple girls get them in the boobs and at one point, two girls, who appear to be walking on a country road in an abondoned area somewhere in another city, show up for the purpose of being pierced. If this was a major motion picture, it might be called a revenge melodrama, but it is in fact a super low budget slasher pic. It contains everything a bottom of the barrell film should: shoddy effects, bad (oops, horrible) acting, awful lighting and an ultra annoying music score that sounds like a keyboard chuckling. But the one saving grace, the killer is hilarious! He's a Freddy Krueger type, cackling wisecracks before doing in his victims. He also doesn't wear the usual psycho garb, as he's decked out in camoflauge and dark helmet, with an oxygen tank in back. Check it out for that sole reason. Be warned though, that the film moves incredibly, agonizingly slow when he's not on screen. When there aren't people getting nailed, we get talky, yawn-a-minute exchanges between cast members. So long, that you'll be glad when they get gunned down. Another problem would be obtaining the film itself, it's a pretty rare find. I bumped into it at a Blockbuster in a little San Diego suburb called Rancho Penasquitos and have yet to come across it again. With all the films' flaws the worst one is that awful acting. It's as if this Lofton guy went around asking his friends "hey, wanna be in my movie??" Even the nude babes are annoying, the first girl with the whitest breasts ever seen, the last girl being VERY impressive. I'd expect a number of sequels if this were a big budget pic, but 15 years later, there has been no follow up to the self proclaimed "penetrating love story".
Power-tools and tits: a classic combination of horror movie ingredients that, as far as I'm concerned, almost always guarantees a good time (I know, I know... I'm easily pleased). However, there are always exceptions to prove the rule, and, despite plenty of bare breasts and much DIY-appliance based violence, The Nail Gun Massacre bored the hell out of me.
Ineptly directed, poorly scripted and badly acted, this dreadful slasher-style effort sees a mysterious killer seeking revenge for a gang rape by using the titular tool to commit a series of murders. Looking laughable, rather than menacing, in a fetching camouflage jumpsuit and black motor-cycle helmet, our maniac somehow manages to stalk their prey unseen, before blasting them with a volley of nails. And for some inexplicable reason, the psycho also opts to talk in a strange, electronically modified Darth Vader style voice, making them seem even more absurd.
The cast recite their awful dialogue displaying zero acting ability, whilst co-directors Terry Lofton and Bill Leslie display a complete lack of skill behind the camera. Throw in some unconvincing and rather weak gore (let's face it, nails don't make a lot of mess: small puncture wounds with a trickle of blood), and what you have is an amateurish production that completely fails to capitalise on its sensational title.
Ineptly directed, poorly scripted and badly acted, this dreadful slasher-style effort sees a mysterious killer seeking revenge for a gang rape by using the titular tool to commit a series of murders. Looking laughable, rather than menacing, in a fetching camouflage jumpsuit and black motor-cycle helmet, our maniac somehow manages to stalk their prey unseen, before blasting them with a volley of nails. And for some inexplicable reason, the psycho also opts to talk in a strange, electronically modified Darth Vader style voice, making them seem even more absurd.
The cast recite their awful dialogue displaying zero acting ability, whilst co-directors Terry Lofton and Bill Leslie display a complete lack of skill behind the camera. Throw in some unconvincing and rather weak gore (let's face it, nails don't make a lot of mess: small puncture wounds with a trickle of blood), and what you have is an amateurish production that completely fails to capitalise on its sensational title.
- BA_Harrison
- 27 lug 2007
- Permalink
- plantostickthat
- 14 ott 2001
- Permalink
A must-see for bad movie buffs. Fun stuff. A killer drives around in a gold hearse, wearing camouflage and a motorcycle helmet, killing people with a powerful nail gun. Bad acting and bad script (the most important elements of a crummy flick) are here in abundance.
After the massacre has begun, there's a scene in a small shop where the old lady clerk says "Remember when you could go outside without having to worry about the mosquitoes or the killers?". Classic. There's a scene of a couple making out in a car, while the radio plays a song (sung by the director?) called Foosball. The dj talks a moment, and then plays Foosball AGAIN. Watch for the scene near the beginning, of the couple in bed. It looks like a less explicit outtake from a porno. "But you said we could play doctor all day, today!" the girl complains. Then, topless, she walks to a large mirror to comb her hair. The camera then shamelessly zooms in on her breasts in the mirror reflection! Hilarious!
The director, Terry Lofton, recently released a DVD of this movie. At least one scene (a couple in a forest)is slightly extended. Oddly enough, my DVD does not contain any end credits, but they are on my old VHS.
I'd say the movie sucks, but that's what makes it so entertaining. I would much rather watch this than Lord of the Rings or Star Wars movies. If you're into this kinda stuff, and you can't find NGM at your video store, I highly recommend you search for it online.
After the massacre has begun, there's a scene in a small shop where the old lady clerk says "Remember when you could go outside without having to worry about the mosquitoes or the killers?". Classic. There's a scene of a couple making out in a car, while the radio plays a song (sung by the director?) called Foosball. The dj talks a moment, and then plays Foosball AGAIN. Watch for the scene near the beginning, of the couple in bed. It looks like a less explicit outtake from a porno. "But you said we could play doctor all day, today!" the girl complains. Then, topless, she walks to a large mirror to comb her hair. The camera then shamelessly zooms in on her breasts in the mirror reflection! Hilarious!
The director, Terry Lofton, recently released a DVD of this movie. At least one scene (a couple in a forest)is slightly extended. Oddly enough, my DVD does not contain any end credits, but they are on my old VHS.
I'd say the movie sucks, but that's what makes it so entertaining. I would much rather watch this than Lord of the Rings or Star Wars movies. If you're into this kinda stuff, and you can't find NGM at your video store, I highly recommend you search for it online.
I read on the "trivia" page at IMDB that the producers demanded more nudity for the first cut of "Nail Gun Massacre". They had the right idea. It was only the nudity that kept me watching.
"But it's a slasher," I hear you say. "What about the violence? What about the KILLS?"
They're pretty lame, it has to be said. Yeah, a bunch of people get killed, unrealistically, with a nail gun. It left me wondering why the killer didn't just use a regular gun instead. I think a nailgun would be a pretty inefficient murder weapon. Though perhaps not the nailgun in this movie, which kills perhaps as efficiently as a real gun, and makes sounds like one when it fires - though never actually looks to be firing anything. There's a sound effect and then the movie cuts to the nail protuding out of someone's flesh.
The plot, eh... I dunno. A woman is apparently raped at the beginning of the movie, and then someone in army fatigues and a motorbike helmet that seems to contain some kind of voice distortion device goes around killing people with a nail gun. He should have lent his device to the other actors. Their dialogue is often inaudible, so badly was it recorded.
Often the killer's victims are surprised while having sex, which in at least one scene is surprisingly graphic. Slashers are pretty much expected to have flashes of nudity, but actually only rarely do they show simulated sex. This one also has full-frontal male nudity, as well as female.
And then it's over, totally forgettably. It was probably supposed to be a surprise when the mask came off, but I didn't even recognize the actor underneath. Had he been in the movie before? Who knows? Who cares?
"But it's a slasher," I hear you say. "What about the violence? What about the KILLS?"
They're pretty lame, it has to be said. Yeah, a bunch of people get killed, unrealistically, with a nail gun. It left me wondering why the killer didn't just use a regular gun instead. I think a nailgun would be a pretty inefficient murder weapon. Though perhaps not the nailgun in this movie, which kills perhaps as efficiently as a real gun, and makes sounds like one when it fires - though never actually looks to be firing anything. There's a sound effect and then the movie cuts to the nail protuding out of someone's flesh.
The plot, eh... I dunno. A woman is apparently raped at the beginning of the movie, and then someone in army fatigues and a motorbike helmet that seems to contain some kind of voice distortion device goes around killing people with a nail gun. He should have lent his device to the other actors. Their dialogue is often inaudible, so badly was it recorded.
Often the killer's victims are surprised while having sex, which in at least one scene is surprisingly graphic. Slashers are pretty much expected to have flashes of nudity, but actually only rarely do they show simulated sex. This one also has full-frontal male nudity, as well as female.
And then it's over, totally forgettably. It was probably supposed to be a surprise when the mask came off, but I didn't even recognize the actor underneath. Had he been in the movie before? Who knows? Who cares?
"The Nail Gun Massacre" is damn entertaining, a deliberately cheesy and comical backwoods slasher flick that writer / co-director Terry Lofton was wise not to take seriously. It's got plenty of gore, sex, nudity, one-liners, filler, and silliness, enough to make it a real hoot, although it does drag at times. It does hit the ground running, in any event. As Joe Bob Briggs would say, it's just about the greatest movie to come out of Seagoville, Texas.
A burly, bearded Sheriff (Ron Queen) and a town doctor (Rocky Patterson) who favours muscle shirts and jean jackets have a problem on their hands: some person, possibly male, possibly female, who wears camouflage gear and a bikers' helmet, is going around murdering people with their handy-dandy nail gun. And this person *always* has a witticism for every occasion, uttering their lines in a synthesized Darth Vader type voice and laughing maniacally in the time honoured tradition of film villains. Could this murder spree have something to do with the gang rape that goes down in the opening minutes of the movie?
This is good - well, maybe not "good" - and goofy fun with some deliciously sadistic kills. One poor guy gets a nail right through his crotch; an unlucky hitchhiker gets nailed to the highway. Our killer even takes the time to target people who are having sex, just like any good horror movie madman ought to do. There is much to laugh at here, and certainly it's not all intentional. The highlight has to be when a victim is nailed and falls on top of his barbecue grill - but even in his death throes, is able to carefully prevent the grill from toppling over. There are some attractive ladies in the cast, and the performances are amusing overall, especially from the deadpan Queen as the Sheriff.
The pacing isn't always great; some scenes go on too long, but in the end "The Nail Gun Massacre" emerges as a funny piece of work that aficionados of 1980s horror are advised to seek out.
Seven out of 10.
A burly, bearded Sheriff (Ron Queen) and a town doctor (Rocky Patterson) who favours muscle shirts and jean jackets have a problem on their hands: some person, possibly male, possibly female, who wears camouflage gear and a bikers' helmet, is going around murdering people with their handy-dandy nail gun. And this person *always* has a witticism for every occasion, uttering their lines in a synthesized Darth Vader type voice and laughing maniacally in the time honoured tradition of film villains. Could this murder spree have something to do with the gang rape that goes down in the opening minutes of the movie?
This is good - well, maybe not "good" - and goofy fun with some deliciously sadistic kills. One poor guy gets a nail right through his crotch; an unlucky hitchhiker gets nailed to the highway. Our killer even takes the time to target people who are having sex, just like any good horror movie madman ought to do. There is much to laugh at here, and certainly it's not all intentional. The highlight has to be when a victim is nailed and falls on top of his barbecue grill - but even in his death throes, is able to carefully prevent the grill from toppling over. There are some attractive ladies in the cast, and the performances are amusing overall, especially from the deadpan Queen as the Sheriff.
The pacing isn't always great; some scenes go on too long, but in the end "The Nail Gun Massacre" emerges as a funny piece of work that aficionados of 1980s horror are advised to seek out.
Seven out of 10.
- Hey_Sweden
- 31 mag 2014
- Permalink
- ericstevenson
- 9 apr 2018
- Permalink
I actually enjoyed this film. I thought the movie had a good idea to it Terry lofton explains why the film seemed so bad to critics cause of the script was 80 pages then dropped to 35 pages and the actors of the film were really nobody's ,but you get that with low budget horror films. The movie was good on 80's gore and had your classic goofy jokes total 80's film. So if you are a fan of slasher films this movie is perfect to watch plus the women in it are VA VA boom sexy. I do admit I wish they would re make this film hey they might everything else is being remade. Being a fan of this film I give it 10 bloody fingers up. I suggest that anyone who wants to check this film out needs to buy the special editon of this film and really watch it with a group of friends . It will leave you in stitches.
- theorphankiller187
- 17 ott 2012
- Permalink
- BandSAboutMovies
- 26 ott 2020
- Permalink
After a bunch of construction workers rape a woman, the men start getting 'nailed' by some vengeful killer carrying a nail gun.
Cheap and trashy all the way, Nail Gun Massacre has to be one of the worst excuses for a horror film ever. Our villain is laughably un-scary, as he makes corny, distorted jokes during every murder! The characters are completely wooden, the plot is non-existing, and the quality of this movie basically consists of one sex scene after another with the occasional unconvincing murder. Granted though, it does have one of the better murder-during-sex scenes of the slasher genre.
Only for those who love movies that look like they were shot in someone's backyard, or in the director's case his grandmother's general store. Grandma cameos as a store clerk reading a lame movie script.
BOMB out of ****
Cheap and trashy all the way, Nail Gun Massacre has to be one of the worst excuses for a horror film ever. Our villain is laughably un-scary, as he makes corny, distorted jokes during every murder! The characters are completely wooden, the plot is non-existing, and the quality of this movie basically consists of one sex scene after another with the occasional unconvincing murder. Granted though, it does have one of the better murder-during-sex scenes of the slasher genre.
Only for those who love movies that look like they were shot in someone's backyard, or in the director's case his grandmother's general store. Grandma cameos as a store clerk reading a lame movie script.
BOMB out of ****
- Nightman85
- 6 ago 2006
- Permalink
Just on the off-chance that anyone might be actually looking for a review for this hideous, wretched little movie, here it is. This movie was made on a budget that couldn't have realistically exceeded $300.00. Seriously. Hershey's syrup gore, rubber nails, cheap, synthy music at the most inappropriate of times, and so much more. The very beginning of this film treats us to what has to be the world's least realistic rape scene ever. (and I am by no means an advocate for rape, but this was just silly) From there, the Nail Gun killer (portrayed masterfully on the box's hand-drawn cover as a guy with his crotch hiked up to comical proportions), a nasty little guy decked out in what appears to be a biker helmet held together with duck tape, some camoflage, and a nail gun with a big, yellow curly-cord which kinda defeats the purpose of camo if you've got a big yellow cord hanging off your back.. proceeds to "slaughter" some backwoods morons, nails a man in the crotch, (who just moans and groans, sort of like Al Johnson from the band U.S. Maple. I'm pretty sure I'd do more than just a little bit of whining if somebody nailed my equipment point-blank) and goes around saying witty things like, "Nailed ya," or something stupid like that. Oh yeah, he drives around an inconspicuous GOLD Herze, too. You see this same Herze parked at a shop where the soon (but not soon enough, as the film proceeds for another 90 minutes)-to-be-revealed killer works, so I guess the filmmakers wanted the viewer to use their deductive reasoning skills. I kinda wish I'd have used my deductive reasoning skills and not wasted $1.08 on this trash.
Also worth mentioning: the killer's voice (they ran it through a synthesizer to make it sound deep and scary. that, and he laughs a lot. mwa ha ha! kinda like that) the killer's running ability (not suprisingly, the killer's stunt doubles were all women. while watching it I'd figured the person actually running in the killer's costume was a 12 year old boy.) the gratuitous, skanky t&a (lots of that good old fashioned 80's skank, too. huge hair, make-up applied 3 & 4 layers at a time, tan lines.. bliss) and finally, the old man (I don't know who this old coot was or where director Terry "T.L." Lofton found him, but god love him he was the best thing in the movie.) There is so much more to this horrible movie that I can't spoil (or can't remember because I've blocked it out of my mind) for you so it's definitely recommended if you're looking for a bad time.
Also worth mentioning: the killer's voice (they ran it through a synthesizer to make it sound deep and scary. that, and he laughs a lot. mwa ha ha! kinda like that) the killer's running ability (not suprisingly, the killer's stunt doubles were all women. while watching it I'd figured the person actually running in the killer's costume was a 12 year old boy.) the gratuitous, skanky t&a (lots of that good old fashioned 80's skank, too. huge hair, make-up applied 3 & 4 layers at a time, tan lines.. bliss) and finally, the old man (I don't know who this old coot was or where director Terry "T.L." Lofton found him, but god love him he was the best thing in the movie.) There is so much more to this horrible movie that I can't spoil (or can't remember because I've blocked it out of my mind) for you so it's definitely recommended if you're looking for a bad time.
Nail gun Massacre is one of the most poorly made movies of all time but, it is incredible funny. If you can get a copy I recommend you see it ONLY IF YOUR IN THE MOOD FOR FUNNY A "B"...no "D" RATE FILM. I surely hope anyone who rents this movie will be looking for sheer terror, but with a name like Nail gun Massacre I'm sure your not. Some hilarious thing to look for are: Man moving after being killed on a BBQ Woman's foot thrown in the air after she plunges to her death in the end of the film Man being "nailed" to the highway Radio song being played in a car twice in a row
Don't forget to have fun!
Don't forget to have fun!
After a young woman is brutally pack-raped by construction workers, a mysterious leather-clad vindicator (imagine the progeny of 'Darth Vader' and "The Wraith" as an audio-visual cue) stalks, then summarily gelds the attackers with galvanised nail gun precision.
I've seen some howlers and this is tough to beat for egregious shoddiness. Jagged editing and jump cuts that look like they've been made with a knife and fork, sound that only certain species of whale can detect with sonar-echolocation and paltry special effects (denim is apparently impervious to nails, whereby they hang limply like fashion accoutrements, despite the victim writhing in pain, clutching at a severely bloodied crotch) are but a few in a litany of feeble production values that will either have you terminating proceedings at the earliest juncture, or, laughing hysterically throughout.
No doubt inspired by "I Spit on Your Grave", there's really not that much substance in the storyline of which to speak, other than 80-odd minutes of, well, nailing. Too trivial to qualify as a criminal justice commentary, and not sophisticated enough to be dark humour, it's amateurish, uncomplicated and unlikely to offend any but those with delicate sensibilities. If you enjoy those 'so-bad-they're-funny' movies, then this should surely please. Others may want to avoid.
I've seen some howlers and this is tough to beat for egregious shoddiness. Jagged editing and jump cuts that look like they've been made with a knife and fork, sound that only certain species of whale can detect with sonar-echolocation and paltry special effects (denim is apparently impervious to nails, whereby they hang limply like fashion accoutrements, despite the victim writhing in pain, clutching at a severely bloodied crotch) are but a few in a litany of feeble production values that will either have you terminating proceedings at the earliest juncture, or, laughing hysterically throughout.
No doubt inspired by "I Spit on Your Grave", there's really not that much substance in the storyline of which to speak, other than 80-odd minutes of, well, nailing. Too trivial to qualify as a criminal justice commentary, and not sophisticated enough to be dark humour, it's amateurish, uncomplicated and unlikely to offend any but those with delicate sensibilities. If you enjoy those 'so-bad-they're-funny' movies, then this should surely please. Others may want to avoid.
- Chase_Witherspoon
- 7 gen 2010
- Permalink
Ok, first off i'd like to say the acting was real bad but it was laughable, which was what i did alot of laughing. The killers voice got real annoying REAL QUICK, but there was something about this movie that made me want to watch it again...not very sure what THAT thing was.
Overall, very funny, and if your looking for a bad laughable B Movie this is the movie you should rent!
Overall, very funny, and if your looking for a bad laughable B Movie this is the movie you should rent!
- blackdeath_8
- 28 set 2000
- Permalink
- poolandrews
- 12 feb 2009
- Permalink
- evilution73
- 15 apr 2005
- Permalink
An hour and a half of complete drivel which is less than not entertaining, about a killer running around with a nail gun, killing off guys and their blonde bimbos. I think the story has something to do with the father of a young girl who is raped going out to seek revenge against the rapists. We see the rape at the start and there's five guys, but somehow the five men turn into about thirty. One of the most memorable scenes occurs in this film when a girl gets killed and the killer is gloating about it, unfortunately the girl is still very visibly breathing, blinking her eyes and looking around everywhere. Maybe she wasn't aware that she was dead. Yes, it's pretty pathetic.
- symbioticpsychotic
- 25 dic 2002
- Permalink
Apparently filmed with a budget comparable to a fifth-grader's allowance, this baby pulls out all the stops. We have "nails" that are clearly rubber stuck to "dead people" who are clearly breathing and a killer that miraculously puts on forty pounds and appears to change gender when "unmasked." Throw in many horribly cheesy comments from the killer and you have one amusing film-going experience. While the film is clearly not Shakespearean, it is highly amusing and the many incongruities/not-so-special effects in the film will keep you laughing throughout. I could think of worse ways to pass ninety minutes (namely a Barbara Streisand movie or anything with Mel Gibson in it). A strong 8/10 rating from me.
My type of rotten 80's cheesy exactly! "Nail Gun Massacre" is commonly known as one of the absolute lousiest slashers ever, a reputation it definitely lives up to, but I can't help enjoying every insipid moment of it! All the trademarks for a horrendous slasher are there: awful acting performances, 100% pointless and gratuitous boob shots, thoroughly lousy dialogues and the extreme gore! It's simply a wonderful film, or to use the biggest cliché of horror reviewing: they just don't make 'em like this anymore! The least you can say about Bill Leslie's and Terry Lofton's "masterpiece" is that it doesn't waste any valuable time. The whole point of the movie is already illustrated during the three-minute pre-credits intro, when a bunch of hillbilly construction workers rape a defenseless girl. Only seconds later, one of them is already severely punished for his bad behavior by someone dressed in an army camouflage outfit and operating the titular tool as a weapon. After the credits, which uses cheesy and hysterical laughter for music, the handy avenger cheerfully continues to nail people down, only now he/she says something incredibly stupid every time he fires his/her weapon. After a good twenty minutes, half of the redneck population is already dead, while the local doctor and dumb sheriff are still cleaning up the blood of the first victim. The pacing slows down a little then, since new moronic characters need to be introduced first. But, no worries, the gore only gets sicker, the sleaze only sleazier, and the killer's one-liners more retarded. Too bad the victims die BEFORE they get to hear his/her witty remarks. Also, the initial revenge motive doesn't stand anymore, as he/she is just randomly wasting horny teenagers like the average 80s slasher does. Yes, it's one of the worst of the decade, but guaranteed also one of the single most entertaining slashers out there!
This is how a movie should be made, on a low budget, with no plot or distinguishable characters. This film reeks of class, so much so in fact that this film deserves a Trilogy as it is up there with "The Godfather" trilogy and the "Star Wars" trilogy. Anyone who hasn't seen this film should give life and limb to see it, it is truly amazing! I would go as far as giving it a 9/10. Enjoy this spectacle if you are going to go out and see it!
- Grapple Man
- 1 lug 2001
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