Creature - Il mistero della prima luna

I have fond memories of "Creature (aka Titan Find)" and I can't deny it. I like it so much, I even want to rate it much higher than 4/10, so I'll just go ahead and do it. I saw it for the first time around the approximate age of 12-13 on a strangely compiled theatrical triple horror bill in one of my two hometown cinemas (together with Lamberto Bava's "Demons" and the Charlie Sheen vehicle "The Wraith"), so it's safe to say "Creature" left a life-long impression on me. Many years later now, I can still say that it is one of the best and most enjoyable "Alien" rip-offs ever produced (judged by cash-in standards, naturally). Sure it's a B-movie with anything but great acting... but there's gore (a wonderful head explosion!), nudity (horny naked undead blonde chick without a spacesuit while she was supposed to wear one), a nice-looking (though pretty rubbery) slimy creature-suit design with red glowing eyes, mind-controlling parasites, nifty-looking miniature spacecrafts and... Klaus Kinski as a German astronaut clearly having a lot of fun on the set and ignoring any guidelines from director William Malone. If you haven't grown up during the 80's & 90's getting acquainted with this type of sci-fi & horror movies, you might have a hard time getting into "Creature" and enjoying its dubious pleasures. Not to say: you're very likely to lack any form of appreciation for this type of (sub)genre cinema at all. I say it's great fun. Even a bit scary and atmospheric in some parts where it actually tries to be so, but that's maybe the kid still in me speaking. Yes, having watched "Creature" at a too young age in a big & dark old theatre, I can say it was a tense ride at the time. Does it matter that it's not anymore? Nah, it remains fun all the same. If you ever discovered it as a kid, that is.

The main problem with this movie is the poor photography. It's just too dark. I'm guessing the darkness was used to hide the low budget set pieces. The other problem is slow pacing, but the decent gore keeps you watching.

The big question I had: what is Klaus Kinski doing in this thing? Just three years earlier he was in 'Fitzcarraldo'. What happened? That would be like Tom Hanks going from 'Forest Gump', to three years later starring in 'Leprechaun 4: In Space'.

I'm going to be blunt: there is nothing special enough about 'Creature' to make it memorable, or to watch it in the first place. You will be far more satisfied watching 'Lifeforce - also released in 1985, with a similar-ish premise, but far more superior. Alternatively, rather watch 'Alien' or 'Aliens'.

A Group of young scientists go on a research mission to explore an archeological find of alien origin. From the very beginning, there are authority issues between the crew members, and constant disagreement. Most of the characters are not fully explored and I found myself not rooting for any of them.

The sound - especially the dialogue - is surprisingly crisp and clear. The practical effects are rather good. The visual effects are mediocre. The lighting is exceptionally bad, making the film very dark and difficult to see at times. Even the good practical effects are shrouded in so much darkness, rendering all their hard work almost worthless.

The creature design is very bad. The creature is a lifeless blob that was difficult to see with all the darkness. One only really gets a glimpse of the creature during the film's final moments - looking a lot like a cheap rip-off of the 'Alien' creature.

'Creature' is a slasher film that follows the same recipe as almost every other alien creature feature, offering nothing new. On the contrary, it is cliched, and with the bad visuals and lighting issues, it might be best to give this one a skip entirely.

Would I watch it again? No.

If a film that gets trashed for ripping off 'Alien' (some around that period unfairly got lumped in that rip-off category, than really just riding on the back of it success), I always see this one being mentioned and to make matters worse it also got labelled as crappy b-grade hokum. Hey I can't deny some similarities (mainly the look of the alien) and routine structure, but I thought it was agreeably fun and soundly made feature that used its budget restraints to good use. It even manages to incorporate a 'few' unique novelties, like that of victims being transformed in to parasite-infected zombies to do the bidding of its alien guest. Um, has something like this been done before?

The film looks cheap, but director William Malone (hey I might like 'Scared to Death (1982)' more) does a commendably steady job of getting plenty of moody atmospherics from the confined low-budget sets (which is murkily photographed) and enough gory splatter to keep our minds at rest. Plus at an added bonus you get the flamboyant Klaus Kinski making a scene. Who knew watching someone munching a sandwich could be so mesmerizing. A small and unusual appearance, but what a scene it was. The rest of the performances end up being stiff, but there's the familiar faces of the credible Lyman Ward and Diane Salinger. Wendy Schaal makes for a wholesome leading girl.

The premise had something good to work with, but the script (with numerous references) is a turgidly silly mess and the real sore point. It really does go on to peter out with the main interest losing out the further along it goes, as you know every single step before it hit's the screen. Despite some nasty cracks and paranoid spells, the latter half just seems to get bogged down in some banal patches. Some of the make-up FX/special effects stand-up for what it had, but the alien costume isn't all that convincing that when it figures in its full glory. You can see why it mostly stays hidden in the dark up until then.

Accessible, but strictly fundamental none-the-same.

My reaction to hearing about Creature, "Klaus Kinski in a creature feature? Count me in, baby!" My reaction after watching Creature, "Ehhh, sh!t."

The story of Creature revolves around dueling spaceship companies (haha) who end up discovering on Saturn's moon, Titan, a creature who's been in slumber for over 2,000 centuries. That's alotta snoozin. So obviously when this creature wakes up it's gonna be hungry as hell. And low and behold it is. The crew discover that the German Spaceship Company has touched down before they have, and when they land they also learn that may have been a godsend. Because they're all dead. Well, besides Klaus. He managed to stay alive. Yay! Well, Kinksi, the romantic waitress from Pee Wee's Big Adventure and the rest of the American Spacemen are trying to figure out to get off this rock and survive the Creature's wrath while doing so.

Didn't I just make that sound awesome? No? Oh. Well, like my summary the movie isn't very awesome either. But it's not totally worthless. Klaus in his minuscule screen-time plays his part in a pretty likable way. The gore though not a lot wasn't that bad, the sets were pretty good but too dark, and the cheesy writing and decision making were enough to make you smile. The ending especially was chock full of stupidity. Anyways, all these ingredients made a decently cheesy flick. Oh, it was a tad too long as well.

I have to leave my biggest qualm (word of the day) for the end of his utterly pathetic review. The Creature was a total disappointment. By the looks of it on the cover it looks like a freak monster ant-eater type thing. And it's cool. But when it's on camera it didn't shine at all. To make matters worse here the creature may possibly be the slowest villain in history of capable villains. Jason does that slowass walk thing but he manages to keep up. This thing literally takes 2 second steps, but still it manages to keep right up. There was one scene where they had the Creature in the distance trudging forward while the guy's screaming "Hurry up!". The dude's freaking out for no reason because the creature probably made about 3 feet in all the time he was panicking.

What a stupid review, huh? Anyways, if you like Alien ripoffs, Klaus Kinski, that chick from Pee Wee's Big Adventure, little bits of nudity and gore then check out Creature.