Lady Cocoa

Oh how I wanted to like this movie.

It has all the ingredients to be great. Charismatic lead actress, cool name, main theme tune. A good set up for lots of action.

We could have had another Foxy Brown here with Lady Cocoa.

But alas, it was not to be.

Because Lady Cocoa herself is such an insufferable, awful, loud-mouthed know-it-all that within 30 minutes I was wishing she'd just get shot already.

Rarely have I seen such an unlikeable main character in a Blaxploitation movie.

Lola Falana has the acting chops and charm to be an excellent lead. But the script writers confused arrogance for confidence, quoting philosophy like it's scripture for intelligence, and a nasty mean-streak a mile wide for charm.

No wonder we never got a Lady Cocoa sequel. No one in the entire world would ever want to see this awful character ever again.

Granted, I had never heard about the 1975 movie "Lady Cocoa" as I stumbled upon it here in 2025. And with it being a movie that I was not familiar, and me believing in giving every movie a fair chance, of course I opted to check out what writer Mikel Angel and director Matt Cimber had to offer.

Sure, "Lady Cocoa" was a watchable enough movie, though it was a rather monotonous and bland viewing experience. Writer Mikel Angel didn't really give director Matt Cimber much of anything outstanding to work with. The storyline just never really latched unto me.

Needless to say that I was not familiar with the cast ensemble in the movie, though the acting performances were fair.

Watchable, sure, but it was a forgettable movie experience, and one that I will never return to watch a second time.

My rating of "Lady Cocoa" lands on a generous four out of ten stars.

Cracking blaxploitation feature stars singer / performer Lola Falana as the title character, a sexpot being released from prison so that she may testify against her racketeer boyfriend Eddie (James A. Watson Jr.). Watching over her are a corpulent, seen it all veteran cop, Ramsey (Alex Dreier), and a former patrolman, Doug (Gene Washington). Cocoa must of course dodge various attempts made on her life while making life miserable for Ramsey and Doug. Because whatever Lola wants, Lola must get, of course.

This is actually a pretty lively and amusing comedy that eventually segues into conventional action and suspense. It gets a lot of its juice from the give and take between the two main characters. Doug doesn't like the assignment, or Cocoa, at first, but we all know it's merely a matter of time before he succumbs to her charms (and assets). Football great Washington and Ms. Falana set off an appreciable amount of sparks in the lead roles; Dreier lends gravitas and experience in his role. The supporting roles are amusingly cast; that's director Matt Cimber himself in the role of honeymooning newlywed Arthur, and Millie Perkins ("The Shooting") as his bride. Washingtons' peer 'Mean' Joe Greene plays one of two unrelenting hit men. Exploitation mainstays George 'Buck' Flower, John Goff, and Richard Kennedy appear as a gambler, 'Sicilian', and put-upon waiter respectively. Watson is smooth as the villain behind everything.

Ultimately, Mikel Angels' screenplay is just a little too predictable (save for one twist involving Perkins). Fortunately, the movie still manages to be fun, with good location photography, a nice action sequence with a runaway car *inside* a casino, and a music score by Luchi De Jesus that puts a few amusing spins on that old standard, 'Pop Goes the Weasel'. Ms. Falana herself co-adapted it with De Jesus for the brassy theme song, belted out by the super sexy lady over the opening credits.

Lolas' bimbo shtick may become wearying early on for some viewers, but those who stick it out will be rewarded with what turns out to be a solid entry into this genre.

Eight out of 10.

I grew up during the '70's and love the movies made during that decade, and Lady Cocoa is at the top of the list. I'm not sure if I enjoyed them as much then as I do now, because in the present I'm looking back wistfully in time, through a hazy mirror that somewhat distorts the images. Lady Cocoa also has constant background noise and the sound of wind even when the action is inside in the casino where she spends her night of freedom. The film has too much indoor lighting and not enough outdoor lighting. For me, that's perfect. Can you really expect to look at the past and expect to see it perfectly clear? Would you want to? If only police shows today could be so tame. Lady Cocoa speaks her mind and sometimes she speaks it in a way that would make a tough guy from the '70's blush. But, deep down, she's a good girl whose naive. She's gone to jail to protect her boyfriend, but now, in exchange for turning state's evidence against the man she loves, she get's a day of freedom. What? 24 hours in a Lake Tahoe casino (Where The King's Castle was located) is compensation for 1 and ½ years in prison for committing essentially no crime? Ask yourself why she would do this as you watch this film.

There is no wonder that Lola Fallana later made a fortune in Las Vegas; she is constant energy and she acts with passion. She is undoubtedly the star of the show, but the performance by Alex Dreier, as Lieutenant Ramsey Miller is a very good one. Dreier's distinctive voice was, certainly, one of his greater assets as a performer. Fallana's co-star, Gene Washington, is, in the beginning, a bit wooden with his performance but loosens up as the movie progresses. "Mean" Joe Greene is, indeed, mean in "Lady Cocoa" as he stalks her, but he and his sidekick had no trouble memorizing their lines: there were none.

Lady Cocoa is a film worth watching. It moves, though slowly, towards a surprise ending, yet the rate of progression towards the conclusion is both entertaining and captivating. And, most important for this viewer, it takes you back to how we once were...and how a lot of films really looked in those days!

The only redeeming element of "Lady Cocoa" is Lola Falana, playing the title character: she is beautiful, sexy and has a wonderful smile. Other than her, the film is a bargain-basement production with a totally static plot - for more than an hour, the story is confined into one hotel. And don't think this works in favor of any suspense, either; the fact that the two hit men who are on the heroes' trail never utter a single word might have been intended to make them look unique, but their actions only make them look inept and ineffective. Things are made even worse by the worn print, scratchy sound and often inaudible dialogue of the DVD version that Brentwood came up with: a pure disgrace. (*)