Downtown

Everything about this noir-ish tale about a smalltime private dick (a tour-de-force performance by Franco himself) is wonderfully endearing. Hypnotic minutelong macro-close-ups of undulating vaginas, cheesy Lina Romay-cabaré-routines and a cool performance only Paul Müller is capable of (I love that guy). This movie has it all.

Franco's private eye is hired by Lina Romay's character to snare her husband with compromising photos of him canoodling with his mistress (The utterly gorgeous Martine Stedil). Needless to say, things go beump (no I didn't spell it wrong, I merely emulated inspector Closeau) in the night and Franco has to do some real detective work.

I love the way Franco played the lead in this one. He glides around town like a little micro mini-pimp womanizing and looking sleepy (and sleazy, mind you) as always. I also like the way he bumps into the camera shaking the frame when jumping over a hedge.

And finally, we get to see the most blatant case of the director Franco taking care of the actor Franco, when throwing himself head first into a threesome with Lina Romay and Martine Stedil, eagerly masturbating them both, for real, on camera. That's dedication to your art if I ever saw it.

And that's the reason I'm a Francophile-He always has something unique up his sleeve you least expected to see. And, let's face it, a fat man bobbing up and down between two vaginas, was truly unexpected. He shoots. He scores. Like always.

Apemolecule

It's always amusing to watch Jess Franco convert the elements of any film genre into a confused, sleazy spectacle, and Downtown: Die Nackten Puppen der Underwelt is no exception. As if the genre of film noir wasn't already replete with clichéd scenarios, here comes Jess Franco's interpretation, a furiously banal, incredibly sloppy, crotch-shot-filled piece of cinematic madness that's overall worth watching.

Downtown tells the story of a private detective and two con-women strippers, one of whom sings hilarious showtunes in English, even though it's clear she doesn't understand a word of what she's saying. It stars Franco, no less, in the main role, and features much of the cast of other Franco/Dietrich collaborations, including the scrumptious Martine Stedil and of course, Lina Romay. The latter two partake in ample nude squirming, in an admirable attempt to portray sexual activity.

The story of Downtown doesn't so much unfold before your eyes as it is babbled at you in rapid-fire, bullet-speed dubbed German narration and dialog spoken by a bunch of naked non-German-speaking actors. There's much talk about what's taking place and why, but not much action to depict it on screen, with most of the non-narrated footage devoted to the aforementioned nude squirming and occasional night club music acts. However, to Franco's credit, Downtown's storyline, though confusing and at times insane, is more developed than in most of his other flicks.

I recommend Downtown over other Franco/Dietrich features like Sexy Sisters or Rolls-Royce Baby, but definitely not over Barbed Wire Dolls.

Private eye Pereira agrees to assist a lady in distress. She knows her husband has a new lover, but needs photos to prove it and get divorced. The photos are however discovered later on a corpse, and Pereira is unexpectedly involved in a case of blackmail and murder - as the main suspect.

Director Jess Franco plays Pereira himself in "Downtown" and with wonderful irony due to the off-monologue where he describes himself as a smart guy who cannot be fooled - whereas in the movie, it happens to him constantly. The voice in the German soundtrack (this is a Swiss production) belongs to a voice actor who also dubbed Ernie in Sesamy Street. Great fun early 70s sleaze with gratuitous nudity, but a remarkably good script compared to many other works from Franco's hand.

I am a self-confessed Franco fan, but this little number from his mid period (in my view his most creative) does not rank up there with his best.

He wheels out the "Barbed Wire Dolls"/"Women in Prison" team for a less edgy exercise than these WIP outings. Yes, Lina Romay, Monika Swinn and Martine Stedile are all there- and yes they get naked (a lot). However it is all curiously unerotic and the plot and love scenes are all painted by numbers. There is none of the sharp edges of his WIP flicks-and frankly it is less fun for that. Just a lot of hotel bedrooms, interior and close-up gynae shots.

Franco himself stars as Al Perreira (a private detective) in this one. He doesn't get naked. At least we are all thankful for that .....

Got to see this as a surprise show within a film festival, we were supposed to get the latest Franco film, but the film didn't arrive in time so this one was pulled from an archive instead. This film with Jesús Franco himself in the main role as a sleazy hitman is a slow but sensual experience. The music in the film feels like a summer's breeze: the kind of jazzy soundtrack Jess Franco is famous for. Then there are the beautiful women: Lina Romay and Martine Stedil are a bisexual killer couple. It's a typical b-movie and every one of these characters are right at home in this world of sleaze.