Throw Out the Anchor!

Apparently filmed for a pittance in Florida, this local production would be entirely unwatchable if not for the two name stars attached to it. Richard Egan was almost at the end of his career and looks unhappy and unhealthy, but Dina Merrill is as excellent as ever and looks fetching in a diving suit. Produced, written, and directed by John Hugh, the film is poorly lensed by DoP Robert Caramico, the genius behind the camera of A.C. Stephens' almost unwatchable Orgy of the Dead as well as Albert Zugsmith exploitationers like Psychopathia Sexualis. Throw Out the Anchor is a million miles from those films, though, as it tells a gentle tale of backwoods folks fighting the good fight against corporate polluters. What comedy there is--and it's not much--is supplied by folks falling in the water or dropping heavy objects in the water. Ha. Ha. The rest of the cast and crew are strictly amateur hour and most of them have few if any other credits to their names, though young Alison Arngrim went on to appear in the TV series Little House on the Prairie.

Although "Throw Out the Anchor!" was rated G, a rating that does seem appropriate except maybe for the most prudish of viewers, I don't see any kind of audience for this movie. Kids will be bored stiff, because there's hardly any action and the movie is endless talk, talk, talk. For that matter, parents will find the movie a tough slog as well. Though they may have more patience than their kids, more likely than not they will find it boring as well. They will also find additional issues with the movie, such as its rock bottom production values and the dodgy level of acting. Also, the level of comedy during the lighter portions of the movie is extremely simple-minded slapstick. In short, the negative of the movie should have been attached to the anchor before the anchor was thrown out.

One almost expects a degree of pathos when viewing the ensemble drama of Throw Out the Anchor. Indeed, when presented with such a serious and irony free play based on one man's struggle against corporate America, and of course his own inner struggle to sustain that true American identity, then I suppose it is not surprising that the material presented is devoid of humour.

Once, while serving in the Second Boer War, my grand-uncle observed an Elephant absent-mindedly defecate upon the head of a Trek Oxen. I'm sad to report that this is a similar experience to that which one will find if one does manage to sit through the serious allegory of the Second World War presented through some middle aged-man's efforts to save a cove from being built over by a road.

Second World War, you ask? Indeed. For within this film you will find the Jewish lawyer forced to gaze upon the remnants of a society he once loved, a sub-continental type praising universal love (representing the forgotten army of the Burma campaign), the child being the face of the baby boomers post war.

There is more, but I just remembered I died a couple of years ago.

Yours, Brian Sewell's ghost.

A public relations man goes to Florida for a holiday, when there he comes into contact with some river people who are fixing up a boat. Before long he finds himself assisting the poor folks in their fight against evil corporate types who are polluting the river where they live.

Sadly, I found this comedy to be pretty interminable and completely devoid of laughs. Its story-line was completely forgettable and it was quite a challenge remaining even vaguely interested with events that unfolded on screen. I couldn't really find anything to keep my interest going quite honestly.

I got this film in the 50-pack Drive-in collection. 'Throw Out the Anchor' I found to be a mundane comedy... it's your average 1970s Z-grade film comedy. Nothing special about it. It's not very funny. It's full of your average jokes and 'cutesy' music. Flat jokes, average characters that aren't that likable & an unmemorable boring story.

If you want to spice the film up watching in x2 mode at-least they sound like Alvin and the Chipmunks - it'll add a little bit of humor that way.

If you happen upon this film, you won't miss anything if you decide not to watch watch it. If you do decide to watch it don't expect very much out of them. It's rather boring.

2/10