L'invasione delle api regine

I was first turned on to this film by Siskel & Ebert a zillion years ago on a program they ran featuring their choices for the best "bad" movies. They were sure right about this one. The plot is so ridiculous it doesn't bear mentioning -- the magic is all in the execution, e.g., Anitra Ford stripping and writhing to the strains of Rimsky-Korsakov's "Scheherezade", a secret laboratory in which women are transformed into seductive automatons by a procedure involving their being bathed in honey and then exposed to bees -- lot's of that kind of thing here. And what's this? The film has the US government sending out an agent to investigate the death of a guy who suffered a heart attack during strenuous sex. Is that where our intelligence agencies put their energies? No wonder they were so clueless about 9/11 and Iraq. Now for some inane reason, this film got reissued on DVD under the tile "Graveyard Tramps". It's true, there is at least one scene in a cemetery, and as to the female characters being tramps . . . no argument. Nevertheless, what kind of moron would throw away a great title like "Bee Girls" for something so prosaic? Oh, and the DVD cover for some reason identifies the female lead as the late Claudia Jennings, who is not even in the film (the lead is her fellow Playmate Victoria Vetri). Go figure. Here's another thing I love about this film -- although it is completely about sex, albeit sex in the context of some loony incomprehensible plot involving a world takeover, and although there is plenty of nudity and seduction, this film from the early 70's is rated PG. Teens could see it without a chaperone. Yep, back when I was a boy, we didn't suffer from the same neurotic fears we now have about adolescents being permanently damaged by the sight of a female breast. Seems we were relatively hardy in those days, although on the other hand, we didn't have to deal with news reports of beheadings and the like. But I digress. There will always be a special place in my heart for Invasion of the Bee Girls, the sine qua non of its genre. And a heck of a lot of fun.

Okay, here's another strong contender for winning the award of sleaziest and absolute most insane B-movie of the 1970's! The human race, and particularly the male species, is threatened with extinction because of … ordinary women turned into life-sized bee monsters! How it is possible for anyone to think of such a plot, I do not know, but this movie honestly handles about a continuously expanding community of women that completely cover the newest members in honey until the pupils of their eyes turn pitch-black and then, subsequently, they celebrate by caressing their own breasts for five whole minutes! God bless 70's cinema… In the small Californian town of Peckham, which is famous for being the hometown of the pharmaceutical Brandt factory, the lifeless bodies of several men are discovered. The cause of death in all cases appears to be sexual exhaustion and, since some of their own eminent scientists were involved, the Brandt Company sends over government inspector Neil Agar over to investigate. The deaths started since the gorgeous Dr. Susan Harris, who's always wearing thick sunglasses and gets invited for lunch by all her male colleagues, launched a bizarre new series of experiments involving radiation. The plot of "Invasion of the Bee Girls" is totally ridiculous and cheesy nonsense, yet the film is very entertaining and spawns an irresistible sense of humor. Multiple sequences are downright hilarious, for example, when during a town's meeting, some doctor suggests a period of total sexual abstention, and the build-up towards each new male victim is a portrayal of pure and gold girl power! Nearly every guy in this town is a horny weakling, ready to cheat on his wife at all times. The ladies, on the other hand, are elegant and charismatic creatures with a lot more brain capacity than the males…even though they fondle their own breasts for no reason. Needless to say "Invasion of the Bee Girls" features tons of gratuitous nudity and lurid situations that don't make the slightest bit of sense. There's an overlong attempted-rape scene that really adds nothing to the plot, while the grand finale seems rushed and amateurish. With the exception of Anitra Ford as the queen bee, the women aren't really attractive, but they unscrupulously take all their clothes off in front of the camera. Respect, ladies! Another interesting trivia-detail: "Invasion of the Bee Girls" was the writing debut of Nicholas Meyer, who went on to script several acclaimed "Star Trek" movies.

Never has world domination seemed more appealing than in "Invasion of the Bee Girls." How can you NOT root for these Bee Vixens from outer space? Their "coming and going" strategy seems "sure-fire" and is definitely a lot more fun (and effective) than in blockbusters such as "Independence Day."

But of course some dumb secret agent is out to spoil all of their over-sexed shenanigans. Nonetheless, Anitra Ford's (an early Barker Beauty on "The Price is Right") performance as top Bee Girl, Dr.Susan Harris, is alone worth the price of admission! I'm definitely going to make it a point to see some of her other movies!

Inspired 70's b-movie about a colony of bees that manage to infiltrate the minds and bodies of glamorous women, and use them as vessels for a takeover of mankind. Here's the rub, so to speak: they 'sting' their prey during copulation with the male species. Hence the 'R' rating. A bevy of buxom b-movie starlets (and loops, e.g. Rene Bond, Kathy Hilton), work their way around the campus of a university under the watchful eye of the sultry Anitra Ford, as she pilots their take-over of the town of Peckham. Alarmed at the increasing rate of stiffs being wheeled into the morgue, local police captain (Osmond) welcomes Federal agent William Smith (in fine, fighting form) along with bimbo sidekick Victoria Vetri, sent to investigate the strange phenomena.

Witty dialogue (courtesy of noted word-smith and director Nicholas Meyer) sets this cult sci-fi apart; Denis Sanders' direction isn't especially taut and momentum does tend to sag, but the constant influx of quirky characters and situations is irresistibly entertaining. Some of the special effects used to depict the bee-vision isn't bad either, considering its vintage. The cast is an interesting assembly of talent, with experience (Smith, Hammer, Osmond, King in particular) offset by rank amateurism. Anitra Ford is a beguiling woman, but her acting talents here are lamentable. Fortunately, her looks do tend to compensate.

Don't be mislead by some of the associated press and commentary concerning this film: while it isn't soft porn, nor is it "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" in narrative or technical standard. Disbelief aside, if you can appreciate the dry humour and lusty amateurs who adorn the screen (sometimes being smothered in bee wax for good measure) you should enjoy this, one-of-a-kind movie experience.

Invasion of the Bee Girls (1973)

** 1/2 (out of 4)

Cult classic science fiction film has a bunch of beautiful women killing men with sex. This film has a rather notorious reputation for its camp value and it certainly lives up to those standards. If you're wanting something serious then go check out The Day the Earth Stood Still as you aren't going to find anything serious here. The film is pure exploitation that only a drive-in could deliver and the movie features plenty of sex, naked women and wacky violence. Even better is some insane dialogue that will certainly make you laugh out loud. The actual story gets boring after a while and I'm sure a little editing would have helped.