Rentadick

Gifted celluloid smut slinger Jim Clark's riotously ribald 'Rentadick' (1972) is a robustly risqué, rump-rockingly rumbustious, bra-bustingly boorish, luridly low-brow, hysterically fly-blown comedy from Brit-sinema's lustiest spray day! Give sulky sadness the shaft!!! As the bawdily backward 'Rentadick' rudely upturns your frumpy frown into a syndicated smirk!! 'Rentadick' rigidly grasps your flaccid giggle gland wiv both 'ahnds and gives it a proper good Tommy Tank! So if you feel all at Bell's End, think you've about bottomed out, fear the lusty lead's bled right out of ya' pencil, then don't despair, slinkily slip out of your plushly velvet Lionel Blair's, generously pour yourself a titanic tot of your most spirited spirit, and take a not-so sneaky peak at comely crumpet Julie Ege's permissively perky, lead-firming peaks!!!! And if luxuriously lewd 70s comedy be your hot cup of steaming meat, then this fleshly fecund film might just prove to be a terrifically tumescent, lingerie lifting, late night treat! Remember, it 'aint a crime to covet a bodacious behind!!! And it's not, as yet, against the law to sensuously stretch your jocular jaw over a prickly pawpaw! Made when PC happily stood for Perfectly Crude, Jim Clark's sinfully penetrating comedy 'Rentadick' is slickly ad-libbed for your illicit, rib tickling pleasure!

This woeful 70s comedy was, believe it or not, scripted by some of the Monty Python team. Appalled at the result they removed their names from the credits leaving John Fortune to carry the blame for 'additional dialogue'. 'Rentadick' probably did seem like a good idea but somewhere along the way it went badly wrong.

Funny? No. The cast - ok, stand up Richard Briers, Donald Sinden, Ronald Fraser, James Booth, Kenneth Cope, Spike Milligan, and Richard Beckinsale. All showed a major misjudgement appearing in this rubbish. Don't waste your time - there's little to raise a smile in this pathetic movie.

I watched "Rentadick", as I assume most people might, solely because I learned that John Cleese and Graham Chapman co-wrote the script; however, in my version at least, they are both uncredited, so they either took their names off out of embarrassment, or their initial work was completely discarded. In either case, the final script is godawful. The direction is so clumsy that it is impossible to know who is in any given scene or what they are trying to do; in its own way, this film is as hard to understand as any of Tarkovsky's work. The cast is a who-is-not-who of British film comedy; the only face (among other parts....) I recognized was Julie Ege. They say few people have actually seen "Rentadick" and lived to tell the tale. Don't risk it. 0 out of 4 stars.

Rentadick is an English comedy where the individual parts are better than the whole.

Armitage (Donald Sinden), a chemicals manufacturer has two concerns: he suspects that his wife Utta (Julie Ege) is unfaithful and he needs to protect his new chemical formula from Japanese spies, led by Madame Greenfly (Tsai Chen). He retains security expert Major Upton (Ronald Fraser) to address both problems. Major Upton sets the virginal Hobbs (Richard Beckinsale) to spy on Utta. He sets his "Number 1", Hamilton (James Booth) to protect the industrial secrets. Unfortunately Hamilton, a rather dubious character with a sideline of kidnapping girls for shipment to the Middle East by Hussein (Michael Bentine), strikes a deal with Madame Greenfly to obtain the chemical formula for her. In this he is assisted by bumbling agency operatives Owltruss (John Wells - who is also credited with additional dialog for the film) and West (Kenneth Cope). Another agency operative, Miles Gannet (Richard Briers), manages to screw up both problems even more.

Some of the plot points have not aged well. The concept of female sex slaves for the Middle East makes one cringe. Similarly the stereotyping of the Japanese and Arab characters are inappropriate in a multicultural world. Anyone who is offended by these unfortunate cultural relics will likely find the film unacceptable and not amusing.

If you can look past those issues the film is moderately, but only moderately, amusing. The film was written by Monty Python's John Cleese and Graham Chapman. However, there is obviously something that happened with the film inasmuch as their screen credits were removed (presumably at their request). I would assume there was disagreement over the vision of the film inasmuch as the tone varies all over the place from drawing room to satire to absurdest. I was astounded to read on IMDb that the director, Jim Clark, was an Oscar winner (albeit for film editing on The Killing Fields, also nominated for The Mission). So there was some talent behind the camera.

All of the actors in front of the camera are quite talented (except perhaps for Julie Ege, who at least is quite decorative). Donald Sinden ,with eyebrows flying, takes the heroic British acting technique of "damn the material, full spreed ahead". Ronald Fraser comes off best with endearing comic mannerisms. James Booth, a good actor, suffers from a script that makes him a cartoon character throughout. Richard Briers is his usual fluttery nervousness. Richard Beckinsale (the father, by the way, of actress Kate Beckinsale and who died at the tragic age of 32) and Kenneth Cope have less to do. As for John Wells, well you either like in a mouse suit (don't ask) or you don't. The latter basically illustrates the issue of comedy in this film. Most of the sub-plot regarding Julie Ege plays well because the actors, most veterans of London's west end stage comedies, are used to the compromising positions, slamming doors, hiding etc. of this genre. However the film transforms into a more absurdest comedy as it moves towards resolution of the chemical formula plot line (which contains the more objectionable stereotyping noted above). Everyone suddenly has to become a cartoon and, while there is no British actor who isn't game, many can only go to louder exaggeration as a performance.

If you are offended by the sexual and racial concerns noted above you should avoid this film. If you can live them and the wildly uneven tone of the film then there is enough comedy and beloved actors to give this film at least one viewing.

P.S. if you want to see a movie written by John Cleese and Graham Chapman (albeit with Peter Cook) and featuring Ronald Fraser that really works I would strongly recommend the political satire "The Rise and Rise of Michael Rimmer" (regrettably very difficult to obtain in North America).

How one film can so woefully underuse such a great line up of actors and actresses beggars belief. A lame script laces poor and very unfunny jokes.

An all round pathetic film.