Up the Chastity Belt

This follow up to the filmed version of UP POMPEII sees the Frankie Howerd character (now named 'Lurkalot') transplanted to the medieval era, where he contends with chastity belts, scheming villains, the Crusades and a certain band of forest-dwelling Merry Men.

In other words, it's an excuse for more of the same, with Howerd making regular asides to the viewer and the comedy resembling a particularly smutty and diabolical entry in the CARRY ON series. The first thing that's noticeable is the paucity of the budget, which makes the film look even cheaper than the average episode of DOCTOR WHO and about on the same level as a school play.

The script is also shambolic, little more than a linked string of tired sketches that usually involve half-dressed women used as window dressing. Saying that, the cast is far better than you'd imagine, perhaps giving an inkling of the state of the British film industry during this era. Graham Crowden is delightful as the permanently sozzled Sir Coward de Custard, series regulars Lance Percival and Bill Fraser give it their best, and there are bit parts for Dave Prowse, Christopher Timothy, Frank Thornton, Sam Kydd and Roy Hudd. Watch out for a cameoing Eartha Kitt (on a sabbatical from Hollywood) and scene-stealing Hugh Paddick as the campest Robin Hood you ever will see.

Forget about the trendy racist/sexist claims from bob the moo. Everyone and everything is stylized in the movie and it could just as easy be accused of being "kingist" "pigist" "jousterist" etc etc. There is nothing wrong with movie except that it lacks material and is a little boring. Howerd fans will enjoy seeing it. Others will have their curiosity satisfied. Some might find it right on the margin of being a waste of time. It is not as good as Up Pompeii.

The basic plot involves King Richard going off to the crusades, his brother John going to find him, and a servant who helps out the family budget with a chastity belt business, which comes in handy during the search for Richard.

Despite the title, the film would not have any trouble with the censors on the basis of sex or nudity.

A dull spin off of Up Pompei is what we get here Howerd plays Lurk-a-Lot (Get it?) in his usual persona (titter ye not etc.) which would be fine if the jokes weren't so predictable (men charging door with battering ram door being opened, men crashing through window etc.) and plain not funny in places. Up Pompei always worked best as a half hour blast the spin off film failing to maintain the gag count through feature length. This film suffers from being the left overs of what wasn't a great idea for a film in the first place.

The usual cast from the other Up... films (Up Pompei and Up the Front) put in appearances in this as well as a guest roll from Eartha Kitt but none really stand out as that good. I'm a big fan of classic British comedy but this is far from classic, if your looking for Howerd at his best then you have to look to his original TV series or in film one of the two Carry On's in which he appeared Doctor and Up The Jungle (not to be confused with this series of films it was a Carry On where Howerd presumably replaced the unavailable Kenneth Williams in a rare film of the series in which he doesn't appear).

Of the three Up..... films this is the weakest, watch the original TV series of Up Pompei and avoid this spin off even the biggest Howerd fans will i think struggle with this 4/10

The Queen of England gives birth to twins. In order to protect the blood line one is kept and the other hidden in a pig style and is raised to think it's mother is the pig. Lurkalot is the one raised by pigs who doesn't know his past. He makes a good living as a servant, selling chastity belts on the side. When his master's castle is lost to Sir Braggart de Bombast, Lurkalot must fight to protect his daughter, eventually travelling to the missions to bring back his master. On the mission he uncovers that his twin is Richard the Lionheart and he is of Royal stock and must bring them both back.

The story to this doesn't really matter as it is simply an excuse to hang a pile of crude jokes on. In fact most of the film seems to keep adding things just to keep the film going. The jokes are ok - but it relies on innuendo and crudity too much, whole scenes are devoted to jokes involving the Kama Sutra! I know that this is a film of it's time but there are far too many jokes that smack of not just sexism but also racist overtones.

Howerd is good here - he seems to enjoy the material a lot more than in the terrible Up the Front. True most of the jokes aren't funny but he does seem at ease with the material - but it's never anywhere near his best work. The rest of the cast is made up from the basement of British TV and have the horrible task of acting out this story as straightmen. The only other good role in the film is a cameo by a young Eartha Kitt - she is really sexy here and really beautiful, unfortunately she is only the catalyst for more dirty jokes.

Overall this is a disappointment - it's not as bad as some of his other films but it's a country mile from Howerd at his best. Quite good but not Howerd's best and it's humour has dated really badly.

I love this film! Whilst 'Up Pompeii' was good, this is far better with more laughs and has the best Robin Hood ever committed to film!

The cast seem to be having a blast and this really comes across on screen. Frankie Howerd and the aforementioned Hugh Paddick in particular shine. A shame Hugh Paddick didn't do more films.

Some will say it looks cheaply made, but that doesn't bother me in the slightest, it's cheapness is outweighed by the laughs in offer.

One of the best British comedies of the 1970's and highly recommended to those who enjoy a good belly laugh, and I suppose aren't easily offended.