La sottana di ferro

I was born too late to appreciate Bob Hope, since his talent showed mostly in presenting and stand-up. He has mostly left behind a less-than-stellar movie career, as evidenced by his highest rated movie (in IMDb) being The Muppet Movie, and even that's not nearly high enough to be in the Top 250. I enjoyed his Fancy Pants, but I have to say that was largely due to the presence of Lucille Ball.

I am, however, a mad fan of Katharine Hepburn and eagerly devour all of her movies. But great as she is, she still has some clunkers in her repertoire, and unfortunately this is one of them.

Egads, the Russian accent. I think that once she realized how bad it sounded (not for lack of trying), she just went all out to ham up the performance. There's chemistry between the two legends that are Hepburn and Hope, but the script lets them down, and the lines mostly fall flat. It doesn't even venture into camp, in which the movie's worth a watch just because you want to see Hepburn play Chinese (Dragon Seed) or a mountain girl (Spitfire). I would pretty much only recommend this for die-hard Hope or Hepburn enthusiasts (like me).

Catching up with two or three Bob Hope movies recently on TV, this, the 3rd in a month, didn't really excite me, even as a prospect before I started watching it. Let me make it clear, for me, Bob Hope was the most charismatic comedy actor ever, but the subject matter of 'The Iron Petticoat' just sounded dull. Katharine Hepburn plays a Russian pilot who has an ex lover (Robert Helpmann) who she meets up with in West Germany at an American air base. It's a bit unclear why she flies there but anyway, after landing she is persuaded by Capt Chuck Lockwood (Bob Hope) to pursue Western values and the pair eventually fall in love after a series of mishaps. That's about it as a story but Hepburn is just irritating as the Russian pilot. I'm normally something of a fan of Kate but in this movie she has such a terrible, harsh, mock Russian accent it just grated on me, rather destroying any chemistry between the two stars and is the worst performance I've seen her give. Hope on the other hand saves the movie with his non stop quips which always keeps me glued to his presence. Apparently Hope's production company was involved which allowed him to alter Ben Hechts' original script as he wasn't satisfied with it and Hecht and Hope fell out over it. The Cold War is a rather unfunny premise for a comedy which is why it didn't really appeal to me but if you love just watching Bob Hope, then it's worth a watch. Supporting actors don't really add anything as they are rather dull and giving their worst performances and the list included great character actors like James Robertson Justice, Sid James and Richard Wattis who normally bring a boost to their pictures, but alas, not here. Apparently the picture has only recently become available on TV as Hope prevented it in his lifetime so you may find it interesting as a curiosity. Only five stars and they're for Hope and his gags and timing.

Bland cold war comedy was a rare British effort for Hope who was teamed for the first (and last) time with Hepburn. Hope was coming off his best film ever (THE SEVEN LITTLE FOYS) so he was in his prime as an actor, but poor dialogue and little happening on screen gave him and his co-star little to do except react to each other. These two pros acted very well together but too fews laughs and no big ones (I begged for even the lamest of pratfalls) made for a murky and unrewarding effort. For die-hard fans of the stars only.

The Iron Petticoat (1956)

BOMB (out of 4)

Every once in a while I'll watch a film with a bad reputation and find it not nearly as bad as you'd have believed. When I heard that the Bob Hope Estate pretty much removed this film from circulation I figured it was just a movie not up to his standards but that's nowhere near the truth. I don't often say this but I think everyone would have been better served had this turkey remained in a vault and not seen by the public. The story centers around a Russian refugee (Katharine Hepburn) who learns her country and gets involved with an American (Bob Hope) ordered to watch after her. This is a minor re-working of NINOTCHKA but who knows what the original story was since there were so many production problems including Hope bringing along his own writers to change everything up. I rarely use a BOMB rating for any older movie but man was this thing here horrible. It was really very painful to watch because it's just so unfunny, so bad and it's just hard to believe that two legends would be involved in something this bad. As soon as we see and hear Hepburn with that Russian accent you're brain pretty much shuts off. Hepburn was one of our greatest actresses but I think it's safe to say this here is one of her worst performances. Hope is equally bad and his one-liners, written by his own writing team, are horrendous. The lack of chemistry between the two stars is incredibly bad as well. THE IRON PETTICOAT is about as bad as any movie can get and sadly for the viewer it never reaches a level of camp or a "so bad it's good" level. When I said this film was painful to get through that's the absolute truth and no one should sit through this unless they want to see how bad it actually is.

Until ironically both stars of The Iron Petticoat died within a month of each other in 2003, this film may have had until June 29 of that year of holding the record for having its two co-stars survive the longest. That was the day Katharine Hepburn died and Bob Hope died on July 27 and between them they had 196 years on earth. That's the only distinction The Iron Petticoat has.

Ben Hecht got on Bob Hope's case for allowing his gag writers to intrude in on his screenplay and story. Personally I can't believe they could have loused it up as bad as what his idea originally was. Katharine Hepburn is a female Russian jet ace who defects from the Soviet Union, not because of any disagreement with Communism, but because she was passed over for promotion in the Russian Air Force.

But the Americans still think they can convert her for propaganda purposes and who do they assign to the task? Not real life American air war hero James Stewart, but Bob Hope who plays the jet pilot who forced Kate's jet down. Who here really believes Bob Hope as a war hero pilot?

It's obvious Hope did interfere and it probably cost Hepburn some of her scenes, but the premise was so ridiculous I can understand why he thought the film needed help. As for Hepburn she throws on an accent that might be described as Maria Ouspenskaya on crystal meth.

Even such fine players as James Robertson Justice as the KGB man assigned to kidnap Hepburn back are wasted here.

The Iron Petticoat was a terrible idea made even worse in the execution. No wonder it's never shown in revivals of either Hope or Hepburn.