Tall, Dark and Handsome

Sometimes mock turtle soup is better than none, and Tall, Dark and Handsome, while not Damon Runyon, is close enough to the Master to be pretty satisfying in its own right. Cesar Romero plays a kind-hearted gangster who has cultivated a reputation for ruthlessness, but is in reality so nice a guy he won't even execute his rival's henchmen, so he keeps them in the basement of his lakeside mansion. Sheldon Leonard made his first big splash as Romero's rival, and is quite funny. Milton Berle has a small role in this as well. Charlotte Greenwood is also on hand, and does an elaborate dance number. Director Bruce Humberstone keep things moving at a brisk pace. This is at times a quite funny film if one has a taste for old-time gangster movies, of which this is a parody. Cesar Romero handles the lead role beautifully, and gives what may be his best star performance. I'm amazed that his studio didn't capitalize on his work here, and produce a series for him. Always an amiable player, he often seemed oddly cast at times. His mix of outward guile and inner softness has never been so well-used, and he is a delight in this film.

From 20th Century Fox's B picture unit comes this little comic gem about a gangster who couldn't kill. Cesar Romero just can't quite bring himself to rub out rival Sheldon Leonard's many torpedoes sent against him. What he has is a private jail in the basement of his large estate where he just keeps them prisoners and treated pretty well at that. No homicides, no bodies.

He's also putting on a big campaign to win Virginia Gilmore complete with housekeeper Charlotte Greenwood and borrowed son Stanley Clements. It goes in fits and starts.

Sadly though Sheldon Leonard does kill rivals, but Romero's policy pays off in the end big time. The henchmen for both get some laughs with Milton Berle as Romero's top non-trigger man and Franks Jenks and Marc Lawrence as a pair of Leonard's hoods who benefit greatly from Romero's no homcide policy.

Tall, Dark, And Handsome got a Best Original Screenplay Oscar and I will say this one is most original.

CESAR ROMERO is the TALL, DARK AND HANDSOME gent in the title role with VIRGINIA GILMORE, MILTON BERLE, SHELDON LEONARD and CHARLOTTE GREENWOOD in good supporting roles.

The story started seeming familiar to me when I realized it was remade in the '50s as LOVE THAT BRUTE with Paul Douglas and Jean Peters.

The real scene stealer here is STANLEY CLEMENTS, the tough little guy whom Romero gets to pose as his son in order to hire Gilmore as the governess for his "children." The story is completely unpredictable with a wacky sense of humor and some clever plot twists.

It's briskly directed by H. Bruce Humberstone and was a surprise hit at the box-office, even nabbing a nomination for Best Original Script. Plenty of humorous lines and situations, even if none of it is quite believable. A fun film to watch around the holidays.

With "Shep" (Cesar Romero) ruling one side of Chicago and "Pretty Willie" (Sheldon Leonard) the other, a sort of peace prevails amongst the gangsters. This equilibrium is endangered, though, when "Shep" encounters "Judy" (Virginia Gilmore) and to keep her close he offers her a position as his nanny. Nanny to whom, though? He hasn't any children so enter the stroppy young "Harry" (Stanley Clements) who is playing along without knowing the true identity of his "dad". Of course, "Willie" immediately takes a shine to her too, but amidst their brief rutting the latter man discovers something fairly significant about his opposite number. It's so significant that it will change the balance of power - but what can "Shep" do? It's quite a fun comedy drama, this one, but boy are there holes in the plot. To be fair, that isn't a predictable one and there are a few (implausible) twists along the way as we head to the spectre of a conclusion that offers just desserts all round. Romero puts on his usual charm but Gilmore doesn't really make much impact. For that we really need to look at Milton Berle's "Frosty" - the right hand man who likes a bottle or two, and to the engagingly attitudinal Clements who clearly went to the Jimmy Cagney school of mobster lingo. It's all perfectly enjoyable to watch with a solid underlying story, but is really too sloppily put together and I doubt I'll ever remember it.

While he is billed sixth, I think the real star of this picture was young Stanley Clements as 'Detroit' Harry! Clements' character was a hilariously terrible little juvenile delinquent and based on this worldy-wise and smart-mouthed character, I can understand why Monogram Studios decided to use him for a replacement when Loe Gorcey left the Bowery Boys late in their run. The series was nearly dead...but Clements did as good a job as he could as a guy much like Gorcey's character. I say watch the film for him alone...though overall it's a fun little gangster comedy.

Cesar Romero is Shep...a gangland boss who is very elegant and nice. How nice? It turns out he simply doesn't have the heart to kill his enemies and he keeps them all in a small jail he's had built in his basement! If his rival, Willie (Sheldon Leonard) finds out he's just a softy down deep, Shep will be pushing up the daisies. But, he might anyway when Willie decides to court Shep's fiancé! What comes of all this? See the film.

The script is funny and clever and the characters memorable. It's among Romero's better films and a nice little sleeper comedy anyone could enjoy.