Wired Shut

A rich author with broken jaw that's wired shut gets a visit from his estranged daughter who harbours a grudge about past fatherly failings.

Dad can't speak because of his jaw so there's not much conversation going on making the first half of the film rather tedious.

Add a psycho boyfriend to the second half and things pick up - they don't pick up enough to make this a good film but enough to save it from being a poor film.

Well I have and let me tell you, it's not that hard. They act like this guy had his vocal cords cut. Good premise but ridiculous to make it sound like he's a mute.

First thing first - the film has heavily botted ratings. All the 10/10 from bot accounts are desperate and pathetic. I don't know why filmmakers or publishers do this.

The accurate rating of this film depends on how you approach it.

Option 1: watch this as a horrendously pretentious thriller with borderline hilarious acting. Enjoyment level: around 5% (the most enjoyable thing is just how hard they are trying). 0.5/10 for the green beard and the red face.

Option 2: watch this as an experimental dark comedy. It cranks the cliche levels up to a maximum, breaking the dial. I laughed through most of the pretentiously scary moments and "plot twists". Enjoyment level: around 20%. 2/10 for making me sometimes laugh (mostly in-between the wandering around the house scenes).

Option 3: watch this as the Polite Leader from The Purge (2013) standalone backstory. I never thought this hilarious character needed his film, but here it is. It's a weird cosplay, yes, but if in a chance this was what you were looking for - you've got it. Enjoyment level: depends on how much you love the Polite Leader character from the purge.

I don't want to spend much time on the plot or characters. Briefly, the plot doesn't make any sense at all. The robbery plan doesn't work, the boyfriend is completely insane, and the daughter never saw this might be a problem. I guess she's not picky. They aren't even sure there is a safe with cash in the house, so their plan was just blind luck. The boyfriend's motivation probably wasn't the money at all. He likes to act insane and cry because of childhood trauma and domestic violence. I wonder what would happen if the father had just given the money straight away.

The film is intentionally slow, with lots of empty scenes. The beginning was exceptionally dull. There are no twists. It's a straight story.

The acting was mostly bad. The actor who played the boyfriend isn't Antony Hopkins, and his attempt at channeling wicker-man Nicolas Cage didn't work either.

The best thing about all this is how hard they are trying, starting with the "dude, check this cool shot" pretentious camerawork, followed by the acting, and solidified by the fake ratings botting.

Since I have seen this film already, I'll give you, a fellow thriller enjoyer, another option.

Option 4: don't watch this at all. Enjoyment levels: 95%. One for each minute you spend on something else instead.

This was a better thriller than I thought it would be. Assuming from the description I thought it would just be another man alone in the house gets robbed movie, but no it was more whilst also being a bit of that. The fact of there only being three cast members helped me see each performance and learn who those characters were easier. Getting near the end of the film it almost turned into an expressive art piece of sorts with emmys boyfriend going into what seemed like madness. Altogether a pretty good thriller.

I will say I didn't enjoy the daughter much, she came off as a bit of a brat. That being said this movie was fully set on the shoulders of three actors. I think they picked a great villain and he was very interesting. I kept hoping I would not have to see the father open his mouth, it was just gross to see. But all in all this was not an awful movie, more of an acquired taste. If you have nothing better to watch this can seem a bit drawn out but it entertains and that was the point.