Itsy Bitsy

ITSY BITSY begins with a tribal ritual, where a black, earthen jar / container is stolen by desperate men. The scene shifts to a mother (Elizabeth Roberts) and her two kids relocating to her new job in a new town. She will be providing in-home care for an elderly collector of tribal artifacts (Bruce Davison- WILLARD), who just happens to have received said container.

As more is learned about the sacred pottery, it becomes clear that something terrible is brewing. When it is broken, the horror is unleashed.

Two things can be said up front: #1- Arachnophobes will utterly hate this movie! #2- Monster / practical effects fans will absolutely love it!

The complaints about the "family drama" aspect of the movie are unfounded. Any such drama is just a necessary part of the overall story, unless we only want a pointless series of jump scares. The movie also has its own mythology, explaining the significance of the creature. A solid monster movie with some creepy moments.

Denise Crosby co-stars as Sheriff Jane Dunne...

Yes, the title was meant to say that. This movie is hokey, cheesy, unoriginal and kinda dumb. But, I was entertained and watched the entire film...and didn't get bored. That says something right?

The story is almost storybook ripoff of Arachnophobia but without the comedic element. And there's really only one spider, I think, except babies and disgusting egg sacks. Instead, they introduce a spider who's supposed to be an ancient deity. Again kinda dumb. With all this power and its ability to survive for millennia, it's pretty cool this one lady gives it a run for its money.

Acting is not anything to write home about and the dialogue was stupid. I wish I felt the makers didn't take making this so seriously. But I'm pretty sure they did.

That being said, if you're good with a mindless film you don't care to think about afterwards (except that the mom from Pet Sematary was in it), then give it a shot.

Let me start by saying that, based on the trailer and poster, I kind of thought this would be more of a tongue in cheek, icky spider killing romp. Instead, Itsy Bitsy feels like a spider slasher flick with a whole lot of family drama instead of teens scared in the woods. While it has its moments, the film suffers from simply not enough slashing. There's hints, glimpses, quick cuts, and teases, but there just isn't enough spider slashing happening here. The audience knows what is eventually coming, and that's largely why we're watching: we want to see this gross, huge spider poison and spider web cocoon people to death!

Unfortunately it's a bit of a slog sitting through the family drama that makes up a large portion of the film (almost all of it). That and the ancient mythology behind the spider's existence just feels boring. Itsy Bitsy is well made with decent performances. But when you see a giant spider in act one, you're really just waiting to see it go off in act three. And instead of a bang, Itsy Bitsy just shoots blanks.

If you're not afraid of spiders, this movie will probably not be scary at all to you. I'm an avid fan of horrors and have become desensitized over the years but always looking for something different and always looking for gore. For me this movie really could have been made as a short. There is nothing horror about the first hour of this movie. I was settling on 4 stars until I saw the last 20 minutes and it made up for the bore the first hour gave me.

"Itsy Bitsy" is a creature feature & a mother/children relationship drama all in one, and, well, there's both ups and downs in it. Now, I don't have arachnophobia, and while the movie didn't make itchy much, it sure did creep out my little sister. Controversial opinion, but it's quite a true stereotype - women and children being afraid of spiders.

I always start with the things I liked, so here goes: Practical FX! Yes, there's no cgi, you're in for a treat if you like gooey & squishy old-shcool horror effects. Performances are, in my opinon, the next best thing - besides Bruce Davison I didn't know any of the actors & had to check 'em out here on IMDb during the watch, because, honestly, they were pretty good at what they were doing. I surprised myself by concluding that my favorite parts of "Itsy Bitsy" were actually the conflicts between the mother and the son or simply the spider-less parts of the story. Not all of them, but some.

The dissapointments are as follows: It's a much less spider-oriented movie than You probably think, I'd say it's 50/50 that and a relationship drama. Secondly, I thought the intro of the story was pretty wonky & could've been anything else, really. Thirdly, the pacing can get slow at times, eventually making those 90 minutes feel pretty stretched out. Also, while the practical FX are awesome and all, it doesn't get much crazier with the passing runtime, my expectations for the climax were bigger & I suppose Yours might be too.

"Bloody Disgusting" stated that "Itsy Bitsy" keeps Arachnophobia alive and well & while it may be so, the summary of it is a pretty average horror flick that shows great effort, but comes out as equal parts awesome and whacky. My rating: 5/10.