Shark Killer

Now I know I probably shouldn't say this, but I did rather enjoy "Shark Killer". I am sure that was almost entirely down to the eye-candy Derek Theler's quite tongue in cheek effort as local Lothario "Chase" who pretty much charms and sleeps his way through life! One morning he is summoned to his hoodlum stepbrother's home where he is given a challenge. Find a black-finned shark that has swallowed a priceless diamond before it's discovered by his nemesis "Nix" (Arnold "Mummy" Vosloo). What we discover quite quickly is that "Chase" is no slouch when it comes to the ninja skills, and that's useful when he and unwilling partner "Jasmine" (Erica Cerra) become the targets of their rather menacing and brutal foe. If you are looking for a silly film about a shark, then you'd be better off watching Tommy Wiseau's "Killer Shark" (2023) nonsense because there is virtually no shark action in this action drama-cum-burgeoning (and predictable) romance. I think there are some South African accents here, but they don't come across consistently enough to be sure - and as far as anything that could be called "acting" is concerned, then maybe we do need to find the shark for that too. Still, Sheldon Wilson uses his key asset - an handsome man - to reasonable effect in this low budget film to deliver something that - try as I might - I just couldn't hate.

In the mid-70s, I want to see Jaws -and it scarred me for life. It took decades before I could swim in deep water without panicking. As a result, I hate sharks.

So it has to be a pretty abysmal film for me to want the shark to win. Congratulations Shark Killer.

The lead actor has one thing going for him - he looks good. His acting is lumpen but things are made worse by the appalling dialogue. The lead actress has a single role in the film : to be saved. Several times. By our "hero". This naturally makes her hatred change into love. Because women are (according to this film) that shallow.

The only reasonable this film gets anything but the lowest score, is that the scenery is very pretty. But that doesn't stop the essential stupidity of this film.

Oh, and if you ever wondered how to kill a shark? Just dive in and stab it with a knife. Or a stick.

Brought out to South Africa, a professional shark hunter and his assistant are tasked with retrieving a stolen diamond inside a man- eating shark located in the waters, only for a ruthless crime-lord to complicate his mission and tries to complete it quickly.

This one wasn't all that bad of an effort though there's some problems with it. One of the main issues against this one is the fact that there's a far greater emphasis on the rather tedious and bland crime/thriller antics than it does on the overall horror tones of the shark attacks. Since there's a great deal of time in the first half here going on about the missing diamond and the double- cross between the crime lord and his boss that really takes up quite a bit of time here which really holds off the horror action considerably. Likewise, it's also filled with a slew of scenes that are based around that crime/thriller scenario from the encounters with the thugs and the meeting up with the two in meetings over what's being done to retrieve the diamond which are basically filler scenes to prevent this from really settling into a proper horror angle. Even the late-film angle of the sibling rivalry between the two of them makes no sense of it's inclusion and readily screams useless material that's unnecessary in the film as a whole. From the numerous shootouts and encounters with the gun-toting henchmen in the later half there's a lot of rather fun action scenes throughout here that don't have any kind of real horror action that it really does seem more like an action/thriller rather than a wholesale horror film, and it does conflict so wildly with the true horror action within here that there's a disjointed pace here where it's all about a series of crime/thriller scenes before it clumsily inserts a shark attack then carries on with the crime/thriller afterward to an extended time without going back, and overall this here really hurts this one. There's still some rather fun moments featured amongst the rather troubling antics, starting with the film's enjoyable pace here to still keep this enjoyable while holding off the film's flaws. By constantly keeping the film going forward with different encounters, brawls and gunfights that even though there's no real shark action featured here, the film does manage to keep moving along at a rather enjoyable and overall frantic pace which is what keeps it interesting. That way once the few attacks do come into play here it's got enough to be worthwhile, and there's some good attacks here in the opening beach attack that gets this started off nicely, the marina attack that has some fun stalking scenes of it going around the oblivious party-goers before the main assault and the rather creepy exploration of the shipwreck below the surface where they encounter the main shark in numerous close calls that leads to a chilling swim back to the surface for some really fine scenes overall here. Likewise, the big finale here where they battle against the shark with the different tactics and managing to get some nice rousing action covered against it which is quite fun. Overall, though, there's way too much crime/thriller here instead of true horror.

Rated R: Graphic Violence and Language.

I would be plainly concerned if any viewer DIDN'T approach this movie with deep, piercing doubt. As well done as the stylized opening credits are, they don't inspire confidence, nor do a light tone from the outset, and extraordinarily direct dialogue and storytelling. It's not that a flick unabashedly called 'Shark killer' can't have real worth, but it's safe to say that one is all too accustomed to seeing pure schlock pollute our screens, and this readily seems to fit in with the same tawdry company. In fairness, regardless of any genre labels that one may append, it's clearly built as a pure romp. We get action, we get thriller vibes, and whether in some of the aesthetics on hand, the suggested violence, or - if we're really stretching the terminology - in its "creature feature" nature, there is maybe even a smidgen of "horror" on hand. Yet all these descriptors almost feel too charged for the generally light tenor this broadly maintains; as if to emphasize the point, protagonist Chase is written as some random white guy who also has significant fighting skills, is gifted with swift wit, and wantonly womanizes - the seaside blue collar equivalent of James Bond, frankly. Suffice to say that this isn't exactly a riveting, white-knuckle must-see. But you know what, 'Shark killer' knows what it is, and doesn't pretend otherwise, and it's not half bad, really.

The least that can be said is that the production was approached more earnestly than we have grown to assume of creature features in the twenty-first century; fare from the likes of The Asylum, and/or SyFy, have greatly lowered our expectations. It's definitely not that this is free of the same issues: the music is more kitschy than meaningful (though some themes are terrific); the inevitable romance is so tiresome as to be actively aggravating; the dialogue and storytelling remain very direct, and the plot is heavily predictable; actors of real skill (Arnold Vosloo, Erica Cerra) are forced into small corners; and so on. There's no mistaking the company this keeps. Still, the digital creations are less transparent, the cinematography is solid and the direction is technically sound, and it's readily apparent that more sincere care went into 'Shark killer' than can be said for a preponderance of its nearest kin. Excepting perhaps the most ham-fisted facets, one can imagine how the picture would look if it were produced as a major studio thriller rather than a mid- or low-grade lark. The effects (practical and post-production) are better than in comparable projects, and the stunts, and in every capacity it looks and sounds better - and more professional - than we would anticipate.

By all means, there were ways that this easily could have been improved upon depending on the flavors one wished to accentuate. It could been more strictly action-oriented (think 'The transporter'), or comedic (an action-comedy like 'Rush hour'); there was potential for a more honest thriller, and even more substantial horror (make Nix and his henchman more violent, and/or amplify the marine massacre, etc). Nevertheless, even if only at a mid-range level, 'Shark killer' is actually reasonably well made. It's reasonably enjoyable, even for all its faults, and some moments are unexpectedly shrewd (e.g., a passing ableist line is pointedly latched upon and tossed back at the offending characters in a subsequent scene). Everyone was here just to have a good time (and earn a paycheck), and along the way, they put in sufficient effort for the end result to be modestly entertaining. By no means should one prioritize this or go out of their way to see it; save it for something light on a lazy day, if you're going to watch it at all. It has its shortcomings. It remains decent enough, though, and sometimes that's all a flick needs to be.

This isn't a shark movie, it does have a shark in it, but not very much. So don't let the title or movie 'poster' fool you. It isn't a terrible movie once you accept that it is an organized crime sort of movie instead of a shark attack movie. But it also isn't great.

Derek Theler was great in Baby Daddy and Erica Cerra was really good in Eureka. Arnold Vosloo was amazing in The Mummy movies. It gave me some real hope for this one.

But Theler didn't ever completely gel as a wisecracking action hero (even though I thought he'd be great at that). And Vosloo's scenes went so far over the top that it often felt like the movie was spoofing itself.

There were enjoyable and fun parts to it, but I'm not sure if it came together as a whole.

The 88 minute run time should have felt quick but instead it felt a lot more like two hours.