megavenganceman

This woefully inept underwritten, very badly edited and directed entry in the otherwise usually reliable Die Hard franchise isn't just disappointing, it's disheartening. I for one was not among the Live Free or Die Hard haters that seem to overpopulate the online community these days. It was entertaining and reasonably exciting with a couple of things they got right from the previous three. Up until now, the Die Hards have been about ordinary people doing extraordinary things in extraordinary situations when pushed to the limit. There were average people like limo drivers, janitors, air traffic controllers, cops, computer nerds and even convenience store clerks all lending a hand to John McClane when the going got tough. McClane used to use his wits and his street smarts. Now he drives crazy, yells a lot and shoots people. The frenetic chainsaw editing makes the action scenes incoherent and the plot hard to follow. The tone is all wrong. There are slow-mo scenes for no reason and overbaked emotive scenes that don't pay off. There are villains with little to no personality and McClane's son is a whiny, thuggish bore. McClane isn't so much smart alecky as kind of an ass-hole now. This would all rate the film okay if even it featured exciting action scenes that you could follow. It doesn't. The shaky cam treatment adds nothing but distraction. This Die Hard blows hard with a vengeance.

The long awaited return of Canada's second greatest comedy export (second maybe to SCTV-arguably) sees the middle aged "kids" in a murder-mystery- miniseries of occasional outrageous proportions. Like the Kid's previous spin-off (1995's critically lambasted "Brain Candy"), it is an uneven affair with almost as many virtues as flaws and therefore is most recommended to the troupe's hard core fans. Still, if you're attuned to it, it can be a real scream of political incorrectness with such taboos as necrophilia, abortion, murder, closet homosexuality, drunk driving, capital punishment, unplanned pregnancy, (animal) euthanasia, child mental retardation along with its' theme of murder and comic mayhem all put to their unique form of comical skewering. "DCTT" is pretty funny overall even though unlike the more clever "Brain Candy", it doesn't have much of a point when all's said and done. Some episodes fare better than others all leading to a rather limp-ish finale with the final revelation of the killer being no revelation at all. Still, at its' much longer running time, it is inevitably funnier than "Brain Candy" with some good performances and some really funny characters. My personal faves include Foley's friendly town abortionist, Macdonald's boom operator (Shaye), McCulloch's arrogant City Lawyer, Thompson's sad closeted coroner and of course McKinney's Death played as the scuzziest drug dealer/skater type you knew post high school only pot bellied and snaggle-toothed with a penchant for redheads. Love that "Got a job to do" song.

Delirious, surreal, and savage, Tobe Hooper's follow-up to his landmark debut ("Chainsaw" for those not in the know), is one of a kind while bearing the same signature stamp he left with his predecessor. A sheer unrelenting onslaught of pure madness, macabre and dark humor. Although not as entirely successful as Chainsaw, "Eaten Alive" is one messed up little drive in flick with good performances particularly by Brand as the psycho Inn keeper of "Starlight Hotel". Mumbling incoherently through most of his screen time and sputtering gibberish when audible, Neville Brand is eerily convincing. The beginning of this picture owes to Psycho in that you meet a character that you are led to believe is the (no pun intended) titular heroine but is quickly dispatched and we are left with the equally sleazy and\or oddball residents of the locale like ole' country boy Buck (Englund, who's a hoot) or that oddball couple who's dog gets chomped by the gator that lives in the swamp behind the hotel. It's that kind of movie folks so be aware what you're getting into. Creepy, oddball fun.