the_shadow_guard

Pretty-looking movie EXTREMELY loosely based on someone's inaccurate conception of what Transylvania is like. This is one of those movies tailored to look good at the expense of the amount of realism that would be appropriate. But remember, Hungarians don't really sound like that, Dracula did not really live in the years given, and (believe it or not) Halloween is not and never was celebrated in Hungary, no matter how obligatory the holiday may seem in a "scary" movie. If you think Kate Beckinsale is hot, then by all means see it, but don't look if you don't want to feel embarrassed by her poor acting or accent (and, after being surrounded by real Hungarians in Underworld, she had no excuse). Enjoy.

You don't have to be an Iliad purist to feel that this could have been a much, much better adaptation, though one might think so. This movie doesn't simply deviate from the original in huge ways; it is a modern movie, a modern culture, with swords, bows and arrows, the institution of slavery, and weird hairstyles thrown in to make it look like it takes place in ancient times. It takes itself too seriously, and so do people. The Iliad is a difficult read, and people would rather watch this movie. Of course, many classicists can take solace in the idea that they can test their students in some pretty cool ways to see who actually read it. "Who kills Agamemnon?"

Watch this movie if you want to see some nice eye candy, but don't take it seriously at all. Not even Priam was close enough to his original character. "Sword of Troy" given to the wussiest son of all, my ass.

Upon the first viewing, I found this tale to be at least less annoying than other Cannon Movie Tales. After many more, I think it's one of the best. Some of the songs are pretty bad, especially the love song, but two things stand out that make the movie, even the singing, worthwhile. One is the art direction. Like the other Cannon Movie Tales, this is a beautifully decorated period piece; every piece of cloth and jewel (both of which have major parts in this movie's plot) look fresh and new, and contrast with the plain clothes of the peasants. Even during the love song I find myself studying the dress and hair of the princess, wonderfully done. The other thing is the comic timing. A lot of the movie is cheesy, but the emperor's vanity (and his making fun of himself in the end), the suspicious guard, the guard chasing Nicholas, and the stupid prince, were all quite funny and seem to be ridiculous quite on purpose. And the sequence during the song Weave-O makes up for the songs that weren't so good.