cameraman_mike_2000

DAWN OF THE DEAD (2004) *1/2 D: Zack Snyder. Sarah Polley, Ving Rhames.

This is a massive "no, no" and should have been called a different name. It was a complete re-imagining of the first masterpiece, and a bit underdone as a remake. Even as a modern day action/horror piece, the violence was plentiful but not as effective. A hint to is why such a bland choice, it lacks the conviction, character building, and suspence that made the iced up original so pulse quickening.

Couldn't put it in any better words myself. It just sucks! Lots of one liners, and lacks charm.

The original film had moments like "Like a charm, like a f***ing charm", "We've got this man, we've got this by the a**", "I see you, chocolate man", "You never aim a gun at anyone mister!... Scary isn't it, isn't it!" And etc, etc....

The mall was a mystery in the original... In the remake, they quieltly walk through the door.

The still born zombie was not effective, just trite.

More like watching a video game than watching a horror movie. The characters were stupified, and lacked a touch of CHARACTER, they were props... Please, change the title to another before it's DVD release. Call it AFTERNOON OF THE DEAD, or DEAD AFTER BREAKFAST, or something so similar to every zombie rip off. I'm about ready to make my own if this keeps up! RUBINSTEIN, HOW COULD YOU!!!!

*** (4*'s) We all know the story. Here is a review.

THE QUICKENING: Best scene in this cut is the opening. The rest of the this film transitions very poorly. Some dialogue is silenced, but we still see their lips moving. The movie is entertaining, still, but doesn't make much sense. Connery's scenes are misplaced, he is almost forgotten, at times. Katana kills David Blake just moments after meeting him in this one. The ending is the most incompetant for the most part. Connor is wearing a prison jacket, then suddenly switches to a trench coat, holding a broad sword after just having a samurai sword. The closing scene is bad also.

RENEGADE VERSION: An excellent, totally revamped sci-fi cut of this often misconcepted sequel. This time, they are not aliens from Zeist. They are from the past, more like a different dimension. Character development is re-attached, plot holes are filled in, and we get a chance to see a blue sky at one point.

Overall opinions: Lambert's acting is at it's best. He seems to be really into his character in this movie. Ironside is a great villain. He chews the scenery, hams it up with comic book dialogue, and demonstrates some memorable killings (the subway holocaust, and the cabbie killing). Watch both versions, you'll find them interesting in comparison.

GRANDMA'S SECRET RECIPE *** D: Jeff Hayes. (Comedy-Horror)

An excellent re-incarnation of the old 80's slasher genre. Grandma murders her family, and finds some inventive ways to get rid of the bodies. Great splatter scenes, and acts of cannibalism to wet gore fans appetites. If you loved Sleepaway Camp and worshipped Hannibal, you will be convinced that killer grannies do exist once you've reached the shocking conclusion.

GRANDMA'S SECRET RECIPE- It's only a dead body!!!!

Slay ya soon! "Burp!" ---Reviewed by: Michael Medina