American Heist

They complained how bad the movie was and they were right. I knew we were in trouble with that cheaply done title graphic in the beginning, which is odd because they obviously had a serious budget.

I think Adrien Brody was a poor choice for the role even though he gave a solid performance. We were supposed to believe he was this hardened criminal just released from prison. Fat chance, with those flamingo legs of his. And what seems like support for him given by some black thugs he knew from prison was nothing more than exploitation of his services, and his brother's (Hayden Christensen) talent with cars, in helping them rob a bank. And Christensen's character was just trying to keep his life on the clean side, working as a car mechanic. The brothers have a troubled relationship, making it one of the most bizarre reunions between family members in movie history.

The film further trudges along with this love story subplot between the straight-laced Christensen character and an old flame (Jordana Brewster) who happens to work for 9-1-1 dispatch. You see where this is going? Despite the efforts of Adrien Brody and Hayden Christensen, this is the worst film I have seen at the Toronto International Film Festival. It was a Heat (1995) wannabe written by an 11-year-old with limited awareness of reality and the human condition, and directed by an amateur. But none of this didn't prevent it from being bought for distribution immediately upon it's premiere.

I decided to rent this movie in part due to the cast, but also for the fact that it seemed to promise that there would be a lot of action. But to tell the truth, I was really let down by the end results. If you are looking for a lot of action, you would probably be better off looking elsewhere. The opening hour of the movie has almost no action at all. What that first hour is instead devoted to is for the most part clichés you've seen in other heist movies before, recruiting people, planning, and other things presented without any fresh angles or viewpoints. And it's awfully slow; I kept wanting the movie to stop spinning its wheels and get to business. But after that first hour, the planned heist is pulled off and takes the remaining half hour of the running time. Is is worth the wait? I would say no. Except for one brief but somewhat cool moment involving a helicopter, the action and so-called tension and suspense feels generic and not the least bit exciting. And the movie ends on a note that feels both incomplete and has you wondering, "Just what was the point of this movie?" I will admit the movie looks okay for what wasn't a megabudget, but I've seen plenty of movies made for even less money that managed to be more exciting, more thought-provoking, and more action-packed than this.

I caught the premiere of this movie at the Toronto International Film Festival this week and out of all the films I screened this week, this was by far the worst. Audience members walked out mid way and rightfully so.

Adrian Brody attempted to play a hardened criminal however came off more as a leisure suited forgettable character. Set in New Orleans neither Brody or Christensen could maintain any type of accent or connection.

Hayden Christensen appears in a role often played by Casey Affleck only without any sort of stage presence. There was zero connection between these two supposed brothers mixed with random crying scenes to evoke failed emotions.

Akon proves that he's just as forgettable as an actor as he is a music artist and having his music included in the soundtrack only added to the ridiculousness of this film.

With a plot containing so many holes that the end was seen before the 15 minute mark hit lets you know what you're in for. Borrowing from Heat and The Town, American Heist leaves the audience wanting more and wondering what and why they just watched.

Jordana Brewster looks great and was probably the only redeeming quality of the film for that reason alone.

Save your time and money and avoid this one.

Action ? Nope. I calculated that the sum of all main characters spent a grand total of 17 calories throughout the story. Mostly because one of them trots about 5 yards somewhere in the first half.

Drama ? More likely. You'll mostly watch brothers talking gravely and crying in each other's arms. There's also 1 woman, and she's in a love angle. That way, 2 requirements of US formatted products are met, killing two stones with one bird.

Heist ? Barely. It's 1 hour and a half long, and the heist itself starts after 1 hour in. I'm not saying that the heist preparations take 1 hour. Preparations ? What preparations ? Let's just pop in the bank with guns, take everyone hostage and hope nobody notices from outside. From now on, you'll mostly watch brothers talking gravely and crying in each other's arms, but with their faces covered.

American ? Yes, the title isn't a complete lie. Not sure what the exact purpose of this adjective is... maybe to warn us that this heist won't occur in Papua New Guinea and that there won't be Austin Minis. Actually, I was expecting a gang of nuke-toting, gum-bubbling, Gump-quoting, segway-racing corporate-tattooed obese survivalists. Of which I saw none, so it's only technically American; just.

Boring, predictable and utterly forgettable, "American Heist" is a complete waste of time. I watched this because my wife has a thing for Adrien Brody. I think he's a fine actor, but clearly this was done just for a paycheck. It's hard to make a bland bank robbery, but it was done successfully here. Just putting known actors in a film does not a good film make, an intelligent well-written script helps and this was just thrown together without much thought.

Save your money and read a good novel or take a walk or stare into space! There are so many poor films out there. When the industry complains about loss of its audience, it should consider the product we are asked to rent/purchase.