Attack of the Meth Gator

Of course I wasn't harboring much of any expectations to a movie titled "Methgator", but ever since I heard about it, I wanted to sit down and watch it. Of course this was something that was spawned in the wake of the "Cocaine Bear" movie. And with this movie being made by The Asylum, you know it is a mockbuster of aforementioned movie.

The storyline in the movie was adequate for a movie of this type and caliber. You pretty much know what you're in for here, and writers Lauren Pritchard and Joe Roche do deliver all the campy cheese that you can eat. And that actually makes "Methgator" a movie proved to be watchable, despite all odds.

The whole part with the cheek slapping thing was just laughable. Even when you stumble upon it on the Internet, you can't help but laugh at the stupidity behind that "sport", and I use the word sport mockingly here, because slapping someone on the cheek until then are knocked out is not a sport, it is just downright stupidity. And why the writers opted to put that in the movie is just beyond my comprehension, but I suppose one or both of them enjoy watching that on the Internet.

Needless to say that I wasn't familiar with a single actor or actress in the movie. And that is usually something I do enjoy when I sit down to watch a movie. I will say that the acting performances in "Methgator" were adequate, at least they were better than what I had expected.

Visually then "Methgator" was not a good movie. And even for a movie by The Asylum, it was pretty terrible CGI effects. And when you have a movie relying on a creature that is entirely CGI animated, you might want to throw a larger chunk of the budget at the CGI developers. The Asylum hadn't done that, and as such, the CGI animated gator in the movie was pretty terrible to look at most of the times.

"Methgator" is a movie that is suitable for a single viewing, then it will just quietly fade into oblivion.

My rating of director Christopher Ray's 2023 movie "Methgator" lands on a generous four out of ten stars.

SOMEBODY has to stand up for this wonderful studio, and I'm delighted to accept the assignment. Does no one watch a movie to be ENTERTAINED, with a big goofy grin on their face? If being The Ripoff Kings Of The Cinema is a crime, why was Roger Corman (the former King) handed a career Oscar?? This 89m of trashy dee-light may be a naked ripoff of Cocaine Bear, but that film left me needing MORE of a delicious new "drugged beasties" genre that The Asylum was primed and ready to deliver! You folks who are locked & loaded to give any Asylum film an automatic 2-star rating (without even seeing it, I suspect) have no place in my life. Let the trash cinema congregation say AMEN!!

But with a massive alligator. The dialogue is almost unintelligible from two of the characters, but it's filmed well and if you like Asylum movies you will enjoy it.

As an aside, the Jaws storyline, regarding not putting off the tourists, is pretty moving.

The false ending worked to keep the excitement going, but I stopped understanding what was happening. You may need to watch this one more than once to get all of the subtle elements. I really hope they make a follow up to this one, as there is definitely a lot more that can be done with this storyline.

One note - see if you can spot the actors from Game of Thrones.

Hamlet it is not. Don't look for deep character studies or powerful storylines here. If you like great special effects, such as Terminator 2, Matrix, this is not it. The special effects are of a lumbering alligator that can swim nearly as fast as a speed boat, jump car lengths, and resist bullets to fit the storyline as needed while at other times is hurt by them. There is no consistency to the creature's abilities, strengths or weaknesses. "If it gets more meth, it will become unkillable" The writers did not consult with scientists or toxicologists.

That said, while the actors aren't Hollywood's best, they are engaging and likable. The Mayor (Patrick Labyorteaux) fits his image well, and does a good job as a gentrified Louisianian. LaRonn Marzett as the scientist does as well as can be expected given the thin writing of the thinner script. Ray Acevedo is underused, he is the skilled and experienced trapper/hunter. Unintendedly Barny Fife-like Sheriff Williams ( Bruce Peoples ) likewise has poorly written lines.

The film suffers from anemic directing, third-rate writing, and dismal special effects. Meaning the only thing that can gel it together are the actors who given this mess manage to be an enjoyable bunch albeit all too often becoming gator-food in bad special effects scenes.

So If you want some background mindless entertainment while you're doing something else and not focusing on the film -this can work for you.

Another day, another Asylum movie, this time their rip-off of COCAINE BEAR. This one sees an alligator consuming a shipment of drugs and going on the rampage, but otherwise it's business as usual and no different from any other of these cheesy B-movies made in the last couple of decades. For an Asylum flick, the CGI isn't quite the worst you'll see; it's not impressive but it's not diabolical either. The worst thing about this is the cast, full of no-names giving shady performances. At least in the glory days of The Asylum they used to bring in some former Hollywood greats in cameos to liven things up, but that's fallen by the wayside these days.