Cabin Fever: Patient Zero

After wasting over an hour of my life on this (yep my own fault entirely) I felt compelled to write a review to save others doing the same. This is without doubt one of the worst movies I've watched in a very very long time. It really is genuinely, absolutely dreadful, with no redeeming features whatsoever. The acting is simply awful - some of the worst I've witnessed in ages, the plot is nonsense, the "make-up effects" are laughable and the whole thing reeks of amateur trash. Put these things all together and you've got yourself an absolute stinker, and that is exactly what this is. Don't waste your time on it, trust me, you'll regret it.

Cabin Fever 3? Where did it come from? Why is it here? Who made it? All these questions you'll probably never really figure out by watching the film. The first in the series was released over a decade ago. It was a nice (or rather horrible!) little film about a flesh-eating virus which didn't need any more done on the subject matter. However, they made a second instalment anyway. This was met with pretty much universal hatred. Therefore, the fact they went as far as to make number three remains a mystery.

Personally, I didn't mind the second one. Yes, it wasn't as good as the first, but it was just about watchable. Number three is about five times worse than number two. It's about four American youngsters (who's good looks just about make up for any social niceties) who go to a remote island for some reason (are you bothered? You're only interested in the gore!) and end up falling foul to that good ol' fashioned killer virus we all know so well.

Cabin Fever 3 is low budget. I have nothing against low budget films. However, if you can't afford A-list actors or special effects, at least try to make up for it by entertaining characters we can root for and relate to. No such luck here. When it comes to the battle between flesh-eating virus verses man, you too will probably root for the virus.

The only famous face you might recognise is Sean Astin. Mordor and fun with Frodo seems a long way off now and he's reduced to some sort of extended sub-plot/cameo in this film. At least he's tried to disguise his appearance with a beard, but you can tell beneath the facial hair he's ashamed to be here and would rather have flung himself into Mount Doom instead of the One Ring. While the annoyingly good-looking teens are being eaten alive by the bug, Sean's been captured by a scientist who is so evil he speaks with a kind of randomly-changing accent which can be anything from British, through Canadian to American. Plus he seems to have employed two Victoria Secrets models for his lab assistants.

However, it's not all bad (well, mostly it is). There is some nice gore and make-up. However, that makes up about ten of the ninety minutes. For the rest you'll probably be asking yourself why these infected people suddenly start behaving like zombies half way through the film (when you're not dwelling on why this film was ever made in the first place). If you like dark and gory horror (with a helping of tongue in cheek) then watch the first Cabin Fever – ignore anything that shares its name made after the original.

Yay, the Cabin Fever franchise continues! I guess that's what the makers of this movie were hoping horror fans would say ignoring the fact that basically no one liked the second movie, not even its director, and it's been 10 freaking years since the original and this only Pt. 3.

Cabin Fever Patient Zero looks to be the cheapest entry in the series, starting with a quartet of barely likable, uninteresting young people going on a small yacht, not a cruise ship as promotional material states, and ending up stranded on a beautiful, uncharted tropical island.

In the meantime, special guest star Sean Astin (The Lord of the Rings, Rudy) is the father of a dead infected kid who turns out to be immune and, now, is imprisoned indefinitely in a remote government research facility located on, you guessed it, that same uncharted tropical island.

Cabin Fever 3 needs something more. Made on such a low budget, this movie needed A LOT of personality to work and, sadly, it just doesn't have it. There are some down and dirty fun moments, some legitimately stomach churning, shocking gore moments with great makeup effects, but these moments are few and far between. Too much of the movie comes down to dull characters wondering around and doing stupid things that don't make much sense until they finally die.

In terms of production values, this movie looks like a Sy Fy original and while it's not nearly that bad, it just isn't that good either. It's more serious in tone than either previous film, but closer in feel to the original. It lacks Pt. 1's zany, retro spirit though. Cabin Fever 3 isn't terrible. It's actually better than I thought it would be and I'm being a little charitable with my rating because I suspect it could have been better if they had a bigger budget. But they didn't, and I can say this movie is just barely worth seeing.

The third entry in the Cabin Fever franchise was undoubtedly a disgusting mistake.

With the attempt to elaborate the origins of the bacterial plague that was previously unanswered in past entires, it offers an overly bloated and convoluted story with nothing special aside being absolutely disgusting. Although not as grotesque as the franchise's second entry, it continues retaining the exhausting nastiness its predecessors began.

The biggest unforgivable dilemma with this film, aside from everything else, was its merged storytelling with two separate situations. These events are intended to conjoin answers but merely create further questions and flaws. Its introduction becomes the film's main subplot and had more interesting scenery than the film's main focus. Despite that, almost none of the characters are likable or tolerable, the elongated and senseless disposable scenes are immediately annoying, and the film dares to become an exciting thriller during its final act.

It's absolutely revolting, stupid, and a waste of contaminated water.

The first Cabin Fever was pretty good.

The second, not so much. In fact I don't even remember the second one that much except that it was horrible. However what the second film lacked, this new one brings back.

I will say that this film brought back the disturbing horror feel the first one had, just that it did it in so many wrong ways. The gory fight scene, something you wont quite forget, was a little too way off the top.

The story line was a little confusing. It sort of reminded me of something from Resident Evil.

There is not a lot of good things I can say about this film. I guess its worth a watch if your bored, but its not something you should go out of your way to see. That's just my opinion.