- Gary: Everybody out, now! Let's go!
- Principal Thomas Walker: What are you doing? Are you out of your mind?
- Gary: There's another tornado heading this way
- Principal Thomas Walker: And you want us to go outside?
- Gary: You don't understand.
- Allison: Yes you have to.
- Principal Thomas Walker: This is a storm shelter for Christ's sake.
- Pete: Not for this
- Allison: Will you please believe us. We have been out there and we know what this thing can do.
- Principal Thomas Walker: I am not going to risk having hundreds of dead people...
- Gary: You will have hundreds of dead people if you stay here.
- Allison: Sir. I have been studying storms all my life, alright? This one is bigger than any one that has ever been. Do you hear that? It will flatten this building in seconds.
- Gary: With or without you, we're getting these people onto those busses right now.
- Cheerleader: [eyes closed, fingers crossed] Please marry a rich guy. Please marry a rich guy. Please marry a rich guy.
- Trey: Uh, we're rolling. So, what would you like to say to yourself in 25 years?
- Cheerleader: That was it.
- Donnie: [to the camera] And Trey, live everyday like it's your last. 'Cause shit, someday it will be.
- Todd White: Hey self, what is it, twenty five years in the future and I just know you are playing in the NBA now and are super rich. And you also have a super smoking hot cheerleader girlfriend, so what are you hanging around here for? Why don't you head up to your penthouse and bang her good, bro!
- Trey: That's your time capsule message, Todd?
- Todd White: Huh... why not?
- [first lines]
- Boy 1: Hey, pass the bottle over.
- Boy 2: A little busy back here, okay?
- Girl 1: Yeah, we can see that, David.
- Girl 2: Yeah, you can get un-busy.
- Boy 2: Oh, come on, Marce. I mean, you know, we skipped graduation for this.
- Girl 2: You are not graduating down there, David Brody.
- Girl 1: Hey, you better not be filming us.
- Boy 1: No, just checking my messages.
- Girl 2: [electricity pops] What was that?
- Girl 2: [electricity pops again] Did you see that?
- Boy 1: What?
- Pete: Great, we missed another one.
- [into the radio mic]
- Pete: Hey you guys know the point of this documentary is to actually film a tornado, right?
- Daryl: [answering on the radio] 10-4.
- Jacob: We need a tornado.
- Pete: We need a tornado. When's the last time we saw one?
- Lucas: That EF-4 that we shot for the Weather Channel last year.
- Pete: Oh, so that makes us zero-for-365. What does that make our average? Jacob, you play baseball, right?
- Jacob: Hockey, actually.
- Lucas: Really? I play lacrosse, man.
- Jacob: Really? No way.
- Pete: [laughing sarcastically] This is fun, just like a family road trip.
- Jacob: Did I miss something?
- Pete: No Jacob, you miss... everything. Although we do have four hundred hours of clouds and sunsets and us going to every drive-in from Idaho to Texas, which makes this the most expensive home movie ever.
- Jacob: Just to be clear, we still get paid whether we see a tornado or not, right?... Right?
- Chester: Twenty-five years time? Heh! My guess is that we'd have blown up the whole world in that time.