- Sid: [Movie's opening lines over the skyline of Mumbai in background narration] Mumbai. City of dreams. Some dream of reaching the hot seat on Kaun Banega Crorepati, some of becoming the next Indian Idol.
- [Camera shifts to Tusshar Kapoor sleeping]
- Sid: A similar "idle" Indian too is dreaming,
- [in a deadpan tone]
- Sid: of becoming a movie star.
- Adi: [Parodying Devdas] Hi, I am the modern day Devdas, Adi. And my film's title is Adi Das
- [referring to the sports brand Adidas]
- Adi: .
- [Parodying Ek Tha Tiger]
- Adi: Hi, I am Tiger and this is Ekta
- [pun on the film's producer Ekta Kapoor]
- Adi: , together we make Ekta-Tiger.
- [Parodying Ra.One]
- Adi: Hi, I am Bra-One, on earth to "assist" all women in need.
- Sid: [In background narration] I told Adi millions of times that your father is not some Dharmendra or Jeetendra who'd make a movie just for you, but he didn't listen. Result... ...
- Adi: [On a show promoting a fairness cream] Before using this cream, my life was a complete mess. At night, my wife used to search for me in the living room using a torch in case the lights were off. When I visited Africa, the kids over there called me "Kaalia". But now, I am fair, though there's still one thing in my body still black,
- [raising his middle finger followed by suddenly raising his other finger pointing towards his eyes]
- Adi: my eyes !
- [In background narration, switching to Ritesh Deshmukh's story]
- Adi: Did wasn't behind in dreaming either. He dreamt of becoming, well, a DJ.
- Sid: [Scenes depicting Ritesh Deshmukh's dreams] This profession is the CD
- [sounding Seedhi which means Stairs]
- Sid: to my success.
- [Imagining as if he has won a Grammy]
- Sid: Thanks guys, I wanna dedicate this Grammy, to my Granny. Aai, you're watching aren't you.
- Adi: [In background narration, humorously depicting Ritesh Deshmukh's failures] Well luck wasn't going well for Sid either. Rather than praise, abuses upon him were getting a raise. Horoscope had made his Rahu into Rahul Roy and nowadays he had his "stars on the earth"
- [a pun on Taare Zameen Par]
- Adi: .