Dear God No!

Not sure where this came from but I like it. This beyond awesome and heavy on the upper female nudity flick is pretty far out crazy. It's a biker film made by perverts for perverts. You will definitely feel like a dirty person while laughing at the demented dark humor. It's very funny in a "not quite right" sort of way. Outlaw bikers run up against an insane Nazi conducting mad experiments on his family members and the local wildlife. When these worlds (different genres) collide it gets totally wacky (the horror genre!) and delivers buckets of the marinara sauce. It's staggering how much is packed into this film from Psychedelic Drug movies, Nazisploitation, Nunsploitation, Biker, Spaghetti Western, Monster Movies, Home Invasion flicks (Last House on the Left), Nature Gone Bad Films, Hicksploitation, etc. Even more staggering, it actually works. For such an outrageously convoluted film, it all comes together without any loose ends. The plot twists are different from your standard Revenge film, get crazier every 15 minutes and you never quite know where this thing is going until the very last frame which will hit you like a Drano enema. It's not a comedy. It's full of scares, shocks and seat clawing tension. Did I mention the female parts? Loaded with every size. Every actress looses their clothes. Quite wonderful. I'm not sure when this thing is being released on DVD but I saw it with an audience and you should too. It screams audience participation. It was so nice to see something other than stupid teens in the stupid woods. I thank the perverts who made this and made my day. See it.

Well what can I say about this one. Being a huge fan of 70's and 80's slasher, exploitation and grind-house cinema I was quite excited when I saw the cover of this DVD at my local DVD store and had to buy it.

I went home that night with high hopes expecting something along the lines of Fathers day or Hobo with a shotgun - was I disappointed or what! While this film had a few slightly funny moments, especially a scene at the end where I had to laugh out loud, I cant say that there was too much else that I enjoyed about this film.

While I appreciate the shoestring budget that they probably had when making this film and I know that I could not do any better, I still found the acting far too cheesy. I know they were trying to get the feel of old exploitation films, however the acting just came across as a high school film studies class project.

This film could have had a lot of potential, however the cheesy acting, the effects and the over use of nude scenes for no reason let it down.

If you take out the nude scenes from this movie ( that added nothing to the plot or film) the film would only be 75% as long. Having a topless stripper dance on screen is great, however to have one dancing in a movie for 5 minutes straight was 4 minutes too long and seemed to me as a way to make the movie more appealing to someone who thinks that boobs in a film make a great film.

I know the things that I did not like about this film are exactly what fans of this type of cinema including myself normally like and are after in a film, however it just did not work for me.

I'll at least give it one thing, I watched it to the end, which is more than I can say for a few troma films that I have bought in the past.

First of all, I am a huge fan of B-movies, schlock, grindhouse, bad but good, anything with cheese etc. This just lacks character or a spark, the film is one step up from a camcorder film shown in a talent show at a community centre, there is little to no effort put in, the acting is bad, but it's "I don't give a s**t" bad, not "I'm trying as hard as I can, but I just can't act" bad.

Now why did I give it 4 stars, well 3.5 but IMDB don't allow decimal points. Well firstly, it is definitely not the worst film ever made by a long shot, some parts are entertaining with some funny gore/action sequences. A few of the actors put in the effort. Plus, the cover is worth a whole star. A highlight real of the action sequences would have been better, or if it was made as a short film instead, it's too long and starts to grind on you pretty quick. They didn't even have the interest to keep it going for the full 80 mins themselves, how can they expect you to be involved for the set time.

If you're looking for that b-movie gem, stay well away, if you like bad but still bad then it's all yours.

3.5/10.

DEAR GOD NO! is a straight-out homage to the grindhouse flicks of the 1970s; in particular it seems to be a cross between THE EVIL DEAD and a random biker movie. Instead of being a real film, this is an ultra low budget production packed to the brim with outrageously cheesy gore effects, depraved humour, and female nudity.

I found it repulsive in the extreme, but not for the reasons you'd think. The exploitation elements are all well and good, but it's the script that truly repulsed me. It's dumb beyond belief, full of repetitive cursing and nothing else. The characters are portrayed as the stupidest people imaginable, and despite the presence of a large gang of bikers there are no individuals here - they're all a bland, faceless group.

The plot is non-existent and only serves to link the various exploitation sequences. The degradation of women plays a pivotal role, with the female roles limited to monsters, strippers, or victims. Sleaziness hangs over the whole production, and as a whole this is the type of film that nobody in their right mind could enjoy. Rodriguez's PLANET TERROR is still my favourite of the grindhouse tributes in existence and in comparison this is nothing, it wasn't even worth making a film.

Ultra cheap, ultra stupid, the worst bunch of "actors" you've ever seen. This disaster of a movie isn't even mildly entertaining. Even the few gore effects are lame and the topless girls are ugly. The fact that the film was made to look like a 70s biker flick gets boring very fast. Don't waste 2 hours of your life... I mean, 1 hour and 10 minutes of your life with this garbage on celluloid. Anyway, the worst thing is the "creature" at the end of the movie. It is clearly a guy in a very very cheap costume and so laughable it will make you cringe. Sadly, this is not a movie "so bad it's good". It is just awfully bad. Go watch something else!