Scavengers

Where do we start...

The CGI was poor (bits looked like they were done on a ZX81), and in some sections of the movie the lighting was all wrong - highlighting the fact that the background was superimposed.

The acting was bad, really bad - no one was believable - but I guess a special mention really needs to be made regarding the "script" which was even worse (did someone get paid for this?). Some of the lines were just ridiculous and seemed at times to be trying to be funny (especially the "baddies" - Captain Jekel and sidekick BreathTaker).

The sound effects were, to say the least, interesting: I would never have thought to have machine gun noises for spacecraft fire.

All in all this is a howler and not worth the 90 minutes you will never recover.

Still not exactly a soap. Not much better than one though. The German title "Space Soldiers" also promises something that sound more like an action movie than it is. But that is not the problem with Scavengers at hand here. The problem is, that while it's cute (and "dark"), it fails to impress on the jokes side. It tries hard to be funny and the actors are probably not as bad as they seem in this movie.

Unfortunately the timing is off and S.P. Flanery might try to outdo Steven Seagal with his performance here (alright it's not that bad. But still worse than anything else I've seen him do and I know he can act). Other than that you shouldn't be too fixed on the production values (because there are none), especially the cheap looking ... everything in it. Still they try their best to hide those things with fog/smoke inside a space ship(?). Yep it's that bad. If you still have a heart of Gold and can't be mad at the somewhat likable characters and some funny ideas (Twelve/Thirteen), you might like this more than you should. Until the end after end comes along ... maybe

Avoid, not even good enough for a wet Sunday afternoon. Script is clichéd as is a lot of the dialogue.

CGI is terrible with everything looking plastic. The lead bad guy says everything in this slow, low rough voice like he's trying to be Judge Dredd but just comes across as a moron. The bit part actors seem to have just been hired straight from some community acting society and are extremely wooden and monotonous.

As fox_wabvyi said in their review all the bad guys have really cheesy nicknames that exactly describe their character and skill set. At least I hope they are meant to be nicknames.

I give 1's to very few films...maybe a total of 3 out of a couple of thousand films watched. This movie is well deserving of a 1 and possibly worse. I'm not sure what I could subtract from the already appalling reviews that have accurately described this movie. But let me also warn you that the actors slurred their words (especially the chief villain) and the audio engineering was also horrible. Be forewarned that the sets, costumes, cinematography and special effects were all equally horrible. Finally, let me say the sequencing of the plot (storytelling) was well below amateurish. I watched diligently the first half of the movie (about 45 minutes) and then started fast forwarding through sections, hoping something worthwhile would present itself....to no avail. To the reviewer here who watched it twice looking for something good, you have my respect as a true devotee...and my condolences.

I think first I have to mention how sad I am to see how low Sean Patrick Flanery has fallen since his inspired performance in "The Boondock Saints", to see him hamming it up as some cartoonish psychotic commander bad guy with a speech impediment that meant that he came over as nothing more menacing than a moron was truly horrifying and painful to watch.

The dialogue in this is stupid at best, certainly annoying and insulting to the intelligence of any who watch this waste of time. At times the dialogue was so ridiculous and forced that it only provokes a jaw drop at the idea that someone pitched this stupid script to a film maker and they actually made the film instead of throwing the script in the bin where it belonged.

The special effects could have been knocked up by any school kid with a computer, the sets were clearly "green screen" sets with poor quality computer modelling and rendering and the hard sets were clearly made by amateur props makers using such items as recognisable wireless computer keyboards glued to a surface and then spray painted to look like a console (They were doing that for such low budget TV programs as "Red Dwarf" which were infinitely more entertaining than this).

WARNING : Cheese Factor - Casu Marzu