Woods Witch

Right, well had I known that the 2023 movie "Woods Witch" was a found-footage movie, I wouldn't even have given it a second glance. I absolutely loathe the found-footage genre. When I sit down to watch a movie, I don't want to watch something that I could have filmed myself with my digital video camera.

The storyline in the movie was bland and generic, and it utterly failed to capture my interest. First of all, it was a found-footage movie, and secondly it was about social media influencers. Yup, I don't like those losers either. So the movie stood a snowball's chance in Hell of gaining favor with me. Writers Shawn C. Phillips and Julie Anne Prescott just dropped the ball extraordinarily well here.

Truth be told, I gave up on this dumpster fire of a movie after 30 minutes of excruciating torment. And I have zero intentions of ever returning to attempt finish watching this dung heap of a movie.

"Woods Witch" was labeled as a horror comedy, but it failed to deliver in both genres.

Of the cast ensemble that I managed to see in the 30 minutes of torment I sat through, I was only familiar with Ken Davitian, Tom Sizemore and James Duval. And I can't fathom how the likes of James Duval and Tom Sizemore would stoop to a movie of this type. But, hey, a pay cheque is a pay cheque I suppose.

This movie is definitely not something I would recommend for you to waste your time, money or effort on.

My rating of directors Lauren Francesca and Shawn C. Phillips 2023 movie lands on a one out of ten stars.

This... oh my GOD this. It just cannot get worse than this. Sally Kirkland - an Oscar nominated actress- deserves so much more than this. Tom Sizemore? Well, maybe he didn't but at one point he was highly respected. Veteran character actor Robert LoSardo and Lorelai Linklater - daughter of Richard Linklater - also waste their talents in this atrocity. It is no secret by now that writer/director/actor Shawn C. Phillips is a complete no talent hack, and he shows up in a hundred Z movies a years but this one is the true bottom of the barrel. The worst found footage move I have ever suffered through and one of the worst overall movies ever made, steer clear of this disaster.

Boy, I usually can put up with all sorts of found footage shenanigans, but this one annoyed and bored me equally almost right away. Actually, about an hour in I had to turn it off, and it took me days to get up the enthusiasm to just finish this one off. Good though to see a lot of well known actors in it at certain stages.

It felt like watching a pretty awful improv group who think that they are hilarious. "I'm going to be angry all the time!" "I'm going to constantly refer to likes and views on Youtube!" "I'm going to talk with a Russian accent!" "I think we got a real good movie here, guys!"

What the actual sht did I watch?? Absolutely awful! I mean, it is so bad I created an account just to try and express to someone how terrible this drivel is..... The acting is for the most part sub-par, the directing seems to be non-existent, and the editing is failing in the fact they thought these scenes were worth cutting together. I have watched trash movies before, but this is a whole other level. It completely fell apart at the bleeding tree and went downhill from there.. Not that it was any good before that.

In saying that, the storyline could have been quite interesting if everything else didn't let it down.

I don't know what else to say. I kind of want the last hour plus of my life back but I would probably waste it on something just as useless as this movie.