Don't Look in the Cellar

A group of college students regret their decision to sneak into the cellar of a haunted asylum on Halloween. One by one they encounter Smiley (Jed Rowen), the last of a flawed bloodline.

This movie is pretty terrible, but the reason boils down to one key factor: they had no money, and used a very cheap camera. They probably should not have made a movie and it definitely should not be on Netflix, but it is and I watched it.

In all fairness, the acting is not too bad, at least from the students (I found the inmates far too cheesy). And the plot is nothing amazing, but really no worse than half of the horror films that get made. I will give these guys a little credit. Maybe invest in a better camera, learn a few new angles to shoot from, and you might have a passable movie. Maybe.

This is probably the worst slasher movie I've ever seen and that's saying a lot. The other review is totally right this was shot in a house unless this is an asylum with a furnished living room complete with family pictures. These actors could not have had any less personality on screen which I'm sure is a combination of their lack of ability and the truly awful writing. Randal Malone as Wendel is absolutely the best part of the movie he steals every scene he's in. He's so bizarre I wish he was the focus of the whole movie. Also it's shot on what I think is an HD hand-held camcorder which really doesn't do it any favors. It's like taking a highlighter pen to your awful affects. It also shows off the bad job the makeup department did (sorry actors). It really would have been better off with a grainier film look.

That all being said seriously you need to watch this movie. If you thought Birdemic: Shock and Terror was bad this is actually worse. If you thought that was funny to riff on at a party this is actually better. Please watch this and spread this plague.

The nurse costumes, and the way the girls acted looked like they were ready to make a porno. It was impossible to take the characters seriously, and the acting was awful.

I really enjoy many bad films because I find them entertaining. This wasn't, it didn't take me long to regret watching it, and understand why the rating was so low. It wasn't entertaining at all, and was so annoying I couldn't actually finish it. Parts of the film I wondered what was actually meant to be going on.

Save yourself the pain and watch literally anything else.

I mean seriously, how the hell can this have cost $1.2 million? Surely they didn't pay any of the actors, because I'm fairly certain none of them had other work and would have paid for any film role.

It doesn't look like they actually used any film. The costumes must have come from a charity shop (or did the actors bring their own?). I'm fairly certain the sets where essentially wherever they decided to get the camera out. Fake blood doesn't cost that much.

Seriously, there is only one reason this film can have been made, and that is to try and make a clean sweep of the Raspberrys.

It is terrible, terrible, terrible, on so many levels.

OK, so I've given you the build up.

Now go and watch it. It is so bad, it is side-splittingly hilarious.

How can anyone insane or in their right mind conceive such a rotten pile of garbage as this movie? From the very beginning, excruciatingly to the end this movie stinks through and through. There are bad movies that manage to entertain for some comedic value but others (like this) that are so terrible they're just plain annoying. This movie isn't scary, frightening or funny in any way, shape or form. I've seen more entertainment in mildewing bread and I'd be ashamed and embarrassed to associate myself with a big stink-bomb much less pose next to the poster. Whatever you do, don't, under any circumstances, boredom or temptation watch this junk!