Kill Katie Malone

A trio of college pals merge their funds for an unusual online auction purchase...an 18th century box which houses the malevolent spirit of a murdered Irish servant girl. When the box is opened, the ghost is set free, and predictable carnage ensues.

KILL KATIE MALONE brings little to the table, but it's a satisfactory little product, nonetheless. Performances from the key players are a notch or two above the yardstick, and their characters are surprisingly developed. This is pretty subtle stuff for contemporary horror, though not entirely ineffective...I actually rather liked the way it skirted explicit visual shocks for a more veiled, spectral puissance.

All in all, a slightly higher quality production than the flat material really deserves.

5/10.

This one starts out with a reasonably fun premise - three college friends, Jim (Stephen Colletti), Dixie (Jonathan 'Lil J' McDaniel) and Ginger (Masiela Lusha), purchase a ghost in a box on an online auction, and stupidly release the spirit to wreak havoc - but the manner in which the film unfolds is so bland and unimaginative that I soon lost interest, propping open my eyelids, praying for it to all be over as soon as possible.

Director Carlos Ramos Jr. delivers mediocre spooky goings-on (CGI jump scares) and a couple of gore-free death scenes, while his cast give terrible performances, my award for worst acting going to the teacher who bites off her own tongue (she's hilariously bad!). Fortunately, Masiela Lusha is very easy on the eye and helps make the going a bit easier, but sadly doesn't go as far as getting her kit off - a shame, because if any horror film was crying out for a gratuitous shower scene to pep things up, it's this one.

Prior to actually switching on the movie, this had promise. The premise that somebody might buy a ghost on eBay (or the copyright friendly film version of YouBid) interested me and I was eager to see how the story unfolded.

Unfortunately, a promising idea has been sold out to the tune of yet another college/teen horror thriller where a bunch of attractive American teenagers spend half the film running around a college or dorm from some kind of terrifying something that wants to kill them. Feel free to replace terrifying something with 'murderous ghost', 'axe wielding maniac', 'Freddy Kreuger' or whatever. It doesn't matter. The play out is the same and we've all seen it a million times before.

Direction is typically brash and predictable, akin to an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer with less camp. Our protagonists make all the usual horror movie victim mistakes and the haphazard introduction of the haunting is far too over-the-top. Too much is shown too soon and the inevitable killing scenes are silly to the point of absurd.

There's really nothing new here. An original idea is squandered for the sake of a safe return on the budget (one assumes). The result is something forgettable and bland.

After the first 30 minutes I knew I couldn't expect much from this movie. Almost all typical "ghost thriller" clichés are used. Nothing new or unexpected. I tried to give this movie a chance anyway, but at the end I still was disappointed. The creepy scenes aren't very creepy. The story doesn't make sense sometimes (one scene she hates him, next scene she loves him..) and as mentioned the story is just too predictable to entertain. I watched it till the end because I hoped it would get better or more thrilling at the end, but that wasn't the case. You shouldn't watch this movie if you are not a big fan of this type of films, and even if you are, you probably won't get too excited.

Two guys and a girl are tickled pink to discover a ghost for sale on eBay. Apparently the ghost is capable of granting wishes. One of the dudes simply can't resist placing a bid, with a little contribution from his buddy. A package soon arrives containing what seems to be nothing more than an old jewelery box with a crappy locket inside. Obviously the locket holds a photo of Katie Malone. Suddenly people on campus are mysteriously dropping like flies. It's almost as if they're possessed by some masochistic entity. Some average acting leads us through a series of mildly creepy moments... ... ... you know what? I don't even know why I watch this crap let alone review it. There's not even any boobs... except Dean Cain! Run away!

Check out my IMDb List for some better suggestions. "HORROR/THRILLER: Obscure, Overlooked & Underrated" http://www.imdb.com/list/8QFZ78e4Ar8/