Journey to Promethea

This is the stupidest movie I have every seen. I could do better filming it in my back yard. I can't believe the video store even carries it. We couldn't even get through the whole movie. The best/worst part that had us in stitches was when Ari dies and they try to simulate the drama of Gladiator with the flashing of his wife on the screen. And his dying agony is probably the worst acting I have ever seen. The costumes are so fake and cheap looking. My son and I were almost crying we were laughing so hard at how ridiculous this movie was. Why did all of the villains have to have stupidly made up distorted faces? What was the deal with the fortune teller with bad white contact lenses? They definitely spent their money on the DVD cover to make it look remotely interesting. But what a stupidly bad movie. What kind of low has Billy Zane sunk to to be in it? Or did he just want to roll around for a few hours with the pathetic actresses in his scenes? Why did the princesses guards have next to no clothing on and half of the people had bare feet? I could go on and on.....

Never before I was in the situation to rate a movie so low as this one. Actors are also simply bad, especially the supposedly lead hero. Imho the only one that seemed any good was Billy Zane as King Laypach. But even the cruel king was bored out of his mind practically begging for the movie to end. Of course the ending itself is uninspired to say the least(with that stone just sitting there in the middle of nowhere).

Special FX are a shame even for an amateur. As a matter of fact they are worst I ever seen. I saw that the estimated budget on IMDb is around $2,000,000. That's way too many zeros it surely must a mistake. I can't possibly think on what they could spend such an amount. Almost all the action takes place in the forest. Nothing was needed to be built. Trees grow by themselves. The castle itself it just a drawing. Also even for the medieval times, having most of the actors walking barefoot is just laughable. Even the king himself has no shoes...

So why does the movie gets a grade of 2 instead of one ? Lots of beautiful ladies save the day... again. It was all thanks to: Marcelle Baer, Jessica Heap, Cherie Thibodeaux, Lacey Minchew(my personal favorite) and few others not listed on IMDb that I made to the end. Also the movie might appeal to small children(below 10) even though it has a few violent scenes. For a good quality fairy tale I recommend The Secret of Moonacre.

Hear ye, hear ye.....if you think that this kind of language is impossibly exciting then you will probably tolerate JTP.....but seriously....

Every single cliché ever is trumped by some of the worst filming lighting and sound, if you were to gave a bunch of renaissance fair geeks some high quality cameras and a wardrobe budget that would be (verily) a massive improvement.

The acting would grace any high school stage - and in fact the whole exercise looks like it was cooked up by a high school drama team.

The only magic here is the amazing trick that someone pulled in getting this greenlighted - promote that person I say - they managed to turn a pile of manure into well, more manure, while still making gold from dross for themselves - now that's magic.

If you love anything with magic, knights, and princesses, then don't, just don't, seriously, there is nothing remotely magic about this and you will watch and then go off and burn your costumes in shame.

Definitely only for the fanboys.....and then probably not even them....

Unless you are so bored, and have watched every other movie on the planet! I swear the budget had to be around $2,000. The music, costumes and acting were just SO awful. I simply cannot believe Billy Zane would agree to do this movie! Maybe his mortgage is going head up... Don't waste your time, go see something else! Voice effects were inconsistent, face makeup was so clearly done by a total amateur, and the plot was very far-fetched. I could not believe how awful and unoriginal the music score was. I am, however, happy that the dreams of some actors were achieved. It looked to me like writer, director & producer Dan Garcia had been involved with some other actual good movies. What made him sink so low?

My first thoughts were shock at how clean the common folk clothes were: bright, clean...supposedly peasants! A descendant of a king gets beheaded. A prophecy is revealed his son will avenge his father. His son is thrown in the King's dungeon.

The king does nothing throughout the whole movie but sit on his throne surrounded by beautiful women in skimpy outfits. He has a jester telling horrible jokes, grimacing and finally getting killed by the king for his poor jokes.

The young boy to be king journey's through a forest and...there were serious spots in the movie but so unbelievable as to be comical on the lowest level. I watched the whole thing wondering how this was going to conclude. Instead of a final impressive battle we only get ...you'll have to see...the budget must have been a tad less than 5 bucks! Geeze! this movie was bad! LOL