Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus

This is one incredibly bad direct to video monster flick (though "bad direct to video monster flick" is probably a redundant term). It has all the classic earmark of the worst DTV has to offer--horrible screenplay, idiotic dialog, lots of talking in lieu of action, that incredibly annoying "avid fart" digital editing, bad grade z cast, Ed Wood level acting and directing, and GC effects that any grade schooler would almost be proud of. Now, this piece of S could have been entertaining despite the abundance of retarded MST3K-worthy acting, writing and direction if ONLY they had sprung for more than five minutes of footage featuring the title monsters. Imagine if King Kong V Godzilla had only featured the title monsters in short three to five second blips and the all out battle between them takes all of eleven seconds from start to finish. Now double how much that would suck and that would be the equivalent of this "film."

To sum up--and incredibly bad, incredibly amateur hunk of junk that would be moronically entertaining if it just weren't so damned boring.

And you thought Godzilla vs. the Smog Monster was the greatest monster battle ever recorded on film.

This is ineptitude at its comedic utmost, with a Plan 9 from Outer Space result: you either laugh at its level of inane silliness, hate it for the same reason, or just fall asleep while watching.

The plot: what plot? This script is pretty much a stew of ideas from other goofy monster monstrosities with pre-historic creatures occasionally showing up, brain-dead military that ineffectively shoot everything they have, useless scientists who apparently got their degrees from an on-line certification service, panicky mobs with screaming extras, hokey effects, intentionally moronic dialog, and pathetically atrocious acting. The cast knows it's campy to the extreme, and play along.

60 million years from now, when another species does archaeological digging, they may find a DVD of this. What will move them emotionally the greatest? The sensitive portrayal of "scientist" Debbie Gibson and the Japanese scientist guy making out in a broom closet? The said same scientists experimenting with different flavors of Gatorade (what were they trying to accomplish in that scene, anyway)? Perhaps the five minute struggle between the enormous sea creatures (only seen in periodic choppy three-second out-takes), or that dumb ponytail that Lorenzo Lamas still has?

Also, which of these inspired performances will be awarded the Oscar? The high-flying mega-shark that can swim at 500 knots, or leap 5 miles into the air and snag a plane moving at about 600 miles an hour? Or the big octopus, that swims around aimlessly with such precision? Debbie Gibson's line chewing while constantly pointing her nose directly into the camera? The mono-tonal Japanese scientist guy? Or Lamas, who utters delightfully uproarious quips in your ears every 15 seconds? Words in the English dictionary simply cannot adequately describe the sensitive portrayals in this film.

I hope future generations will experience this landmark cinema and utilize it as an insight of the sophistication of our present-day culture. I'd also like to see the looks on their faces.

Watching a movie for camp value is a risky thing. To be sure, there are many movies that embrace their silliness and play up their camp value, but sometimes the best campy movies are the ones that take themselves too seriously without realizing that they're completely absurd to begin with. After viewing "Tale of the Mummy," and finally recognizing the virtues of an "unintentionally funny" movie, my friend and I decided to try again, this time with a movie whose title, "Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus" is so lame that the movie could only be campy fun...or so we thought.

Putting it bluntly, this is the worst movie I have ever seen. No amount of alcohol or other substance can bring out any entertainment value from this piece of crap. The acting is awful, the dialogue is a waste of printer paper, the special effects are an embarrassment, and worst of all, the movie doesn't make any sense. We hardly ever get to see the headlining stars, and when we do, they're just crude CGI effects that are repeated over and over again.

I'd describe the plot, but there it isn't coherent enough to begin with. All that I can tell you is that an ancient species of shark, the Megalodon (an actual species of shark, and that's the only thing that this movie gets right) and a king-sized octopus (that looks more like a squid) were found locked in battle in a giant ice cube. Somehow, they escape, and start terrorizing Japan and San Francisco. Now, it's up to three scientists to stop them.

The acting is awful. 80's pop star Deborah Gibson fares the best, although that's hardly praise. Vic Chao is horrible as her newfound love interest. Surprisingly, this is the only plot line that is coherent, and judging by how much we hate these two characters, that's not a good thing. Lorenzo Lamas is the worst of the lot as the idiot military guy, who wants to blow everything away instead of listening to the scientists (which, judging by their plan, is probably the smarter thing to do, except the movie expects us to sympathize with the moronic scientists...I guess gung-ho military types aren't all that bad).

This is what happens when you make a 200 million dollar epic for less than a dime. Camera shots are obviously repeated (sometimes the monsters are left out of a shot when they're supposed to be destroying something), the acting is grating, and the dialogue is cringe inducing. Even the extras look embarrassed, and they don't say anything. One could argue that this film might have worked with a bigger budget. The truth of the matter is, however creatively bankrupt Hollywood is, no one in the right mind would read this script without first running it through the paper shredder and burning all remnants of its existence.

Words cannot adequately describe how awful this movie is. Physical pain is almost pleasurable compared to the agony that this movie causes. This movie is hard to find, but it should be impossible. This movie should have never been made.

As I am huge fan of Killer Animals movies, Spiders, Crocdie , Octopus, Ant, Birds, Dogs, Slugs/Worms, Frogs, you name it, I would like it

I was so looking forward to this movie since i saw trailer but this movie was HUGE let down for me

You will have to seat thought 75 minutes of really BAD acting, (The acting is so bad that it make want to turn the movie off ) for the first Fight scene and I am sure they use the same scenes over and over and over again in the Fight it self was unbeliever RUBBISH and even bigger let down the whole movie

However You do get to see the Octupus and Shark before the Fight scene at different times out of the water!

I would rather watch Octupus 2 (2000) again instead of this!

2/10

Yes, it's Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus I believe that true talent shines with this cast and leads of course with everybody's favourite motorcycle rebel - Lorenzo Lamas. Casting his sheer energy to sparkle across a screen, his charm and elegance emblazoned on celluloid forever.

With a script, story and production so tight, so in-depth and intricate, how can you not be involved in the battle between Mega Shark and Giant Octopus? I feel that this story is about how we - the people are being sucked and mauled by our government and we have no idea how to handle the problems that keep us down.

The government tries to come up with solutions, but they don't have a clue and we are helpless to fight until all we can do is watch in terror as we prepare to die.

The government is trying to keep u s down and this is a fantastic story that really defines how true that really is.

By destroying our Eco system and bringing up problems which we can never deal with, we are put into the hands of those who are supposed to have the answers, but don't.

When the best they can do is all the same things as before and they fail, we are left to the forces of nature to choke us and kill us in all their glory - maybe by some slim chance we will survive.

This is really the story behind this story.