Sand Serpents

Contains some very general spoilers.

When watching news reports about todays combat troops on the front lines, two of the things that come to mind are how shockingly young all of the soldiers are, and how shockingly short all of their haircuts are. In SAND SERPENTS, the cast looks like it was plucked from a Green Day mosh pit. These actors are about as solder-like as my left foot, and my left foot is not all that military. The actors are too old and they don't look or act like elite special forces military.

Here is the 3% fun in SAND SERPENTS... it is kind of fun debating with fellow viewers whether the sand worms in SAND SERPENTS are copied from the sand worms in TREMORS or are instead copied from the sand worms in DUNE. The rest of the movie experience is bad in a dull sort of way.

SAND SERPENTS has pretty good pacing, but other than that it is difficult to find good things to say. There are better monster movies out there where the cast dies one person at a time. And there are much better sand worm movies out there, so please watch one of those.

Now that Iraq has simmered down, the war news such as it is concerns Afghanistan. Something the government is keeping from the American public are those giant worms that are doing more damage to the Allies, the Taliban, and anything else they take a mind to eat. And as big as they are they've got some huge appetites.

Jason Gedrick and a small group of Marines are stranded out in the remote Afghan desert. But it ain't the Taliban that's worrying them, it's these giant refugees from Tremors. In fact the big worms prove to be an ally of sorts by doing better against the Taliban than these clearly outclassed troops are. No reflection to the Marine Corps, but battling these enemies is something not covered in their training.

It all gets downright silly at times. But if these things are out there I suggest we let them breed and chow down on the Jihadists. Otherwise I'd pass Sand Serpents right on by.

While out on a routine assignment, a group of soldiers in Afghanistan find they have awoken a swarm of gigantic worm-like creatures and must fend off both the creature and the Taliban in order to get out of the situation alive.

This one here wasn't all that bad of a creature feature. One of the better features here is that there's a rather fun and frantic pace here that comes off exceptionally well as there's some fine action scenes within here. This is mostly apparent in the first twenty minutes which is the ambush gunfight at the mine with the insurgents which is a really blazing gunfight that results in their capture only to be rescued by the worms ambushing the other terrorists leaving them alone. This continue on into the fun chopper attack as the sudden-ness of them appearing and generating the attack on the chopper is a nice surprise as well as leading into the chase back to the camp where there's plenty of fun to be had from that, a thrilling chase in the desert as they race away from several burrowing creatures that has some nice moments from some ingenious tactics being utilized in a second chase away from the refugee camp that comes off really well with the race to get into the bunker before the worms can get to them. Other fun action comes from the grand shootout with the reinforcements back at the hideout where the worms come into play with their inadvertent rescue which is all in line with the final half here as the big series of chasing and encounters throughout the tunnels which gives this some really fun action here in their encounter with the worms as they run into the tunnels, their underground adventures coming across the traps and supplies while the escape to the surface brings some really tense moments here with the final attack on the terrorists at the campsite and the race to get into the rescue plane gives this one some really fun times here. Along with the overall fun creature design, these here offer this a lot to really like here over it's few minor flaws. Among the biggest issues here is the fact that the film continues harping on the one character labeling the entire nation as terrorists despite plenty of times that he's saved their lives in the line or duty or given them access to something they shouldn't have in their condition, which is done so often in here that it becomes utterly annoying and rather racist. This also manages to come through with a rather puzzling flaw here in that there's the return trip to the mine, as that's where the creatures are known to be so that doesn't make any sense why they return. Even considering this facet is the fact that this is their base which would've been another reason to leave, and even then they could've brought the radio along anyway which gives this whole section some really wrong decision-making. Along with very little blood and gore in the kills here, these hold this one back somewhat.

Rated R: Graphic Violence, Language and children-in-jeopardy.

Another SyFy ditty, with suspiciously familiar creatures and plot lines. This one looks like a hybrid mix of Tremors and an assortment of "Marines fight monsters" movies like Aliens.

Giant slinkies with vacuum sweeper tendencies look for quick meals in the Afghan desert. While this week's squad of Marine victims fight with Taliban insurgents, the faceless maws of the Sand Serpents sneak up on both. As per usual, characters are knocked off one-by-one, first with the nameless ones with no lines, then eliminating those with a few lines, finally getting to the top-billing folks.

It would be easy to dismiss this one, but it actually does have its moments. The characters that survive more then the first 20 minutes or so are actually developed somewhat, and the acting isn't bad at all. There's a child in the cast who does especially well. The special effects appear cheap in places, as if done on a home PC. However, since the premise is so bizarre, the hokey effects fit in a weird way. One character who never shuts up has the exact fate you hope for and know is coming sooner or later (and that finally shuts him up, permanently lol).

This one's just for laughs, like the old MST3K flicks.

Sand Serpents. No one died in this Syfy Original Movie until the 6 minute mark. Impressive.

A small combat unit overseas that ends up dealing with giant underground worms or snakes.

You're probably thinking what I'm thinking. Dune meets Tremors. Sure, because it's basically just that.

The difference is that the writing is much better than the usual Saturday Night Original fare on Syfy and if you have nothing better to do, it passed the time rather well.

There are some obvious holes in the skit as they skipped some scenes where special effects could have been used, but we know what happened. Who really needs to see a giant snake blow up anyway? My guess, they were saving money.

When the worms feed on Taliban, they kind of reminded me of giant Slinky's with teeth.

Overall, 1-10, I'd say a 5, maybe a 6 if you were drinking.

The writing was better than most of their Saturday Night Original movies, the effects weren't bad but there were holes in some of the cinematography. Who ever edited the final product may have been the one that created some of the disjointed scenes.

The ending for me got lame as I feel there was a much smarter resolution at hand aside from the one that took place. Then again, if he was stupid enough to have taken his course of action aside, then I guess this scene, that was reminiscent of Reign Of Fire, is fine.

You'll know what I mean when / if you see it.