Diana: The Musical

A lyrically bankrupt torture scene lasting two hours cleverly edited to feel like four.

The only saving grace is the use of the word "sod" five times (an underrated insult) and Barbara Cartland's introduction of James Hewitt, the majesty of which is a sight to behold.

I am surprised this was done by the creative team behind the musical Memphis. I enjoyed that show. Diana has some of the worst lyrics I have ever heard. I laughed a lot at the choreography. This is the ideal show to watch if you are a fan of train wrecks.

It's a musical train wreck. 2 hours of teeth gritting,cringe worthy, eye rolling baaaad. I wonder what the pitch was when this was in the planning stage. "Let's dig up Diana's corpse and dance it across the stage to bad music." We were all in front row seats as the dumpster fire that was Charles and Diana's marriage imploded. Why would they think it was a grand idea to replay it on stage, and to music yet. The actors did their best with the material they were given. They seemed enthusiastic but you can't make a silk purse out of this sow's ear. There's no fairy tale ending here, just as it was with the real Diana.

I gave it a one because zero stars is not an option. A jaw dropping event. Hysterical, stupid, but ultimately, just damned depressing. Is this really where musical theater has gone? Into the hands of rank amateurs? It had to be written by the fifteen year old nephew of one of the producers who based his knowledge of the story on tabloid headlines. Not tabloid stories, just the headlines! If this opened during the Golden Age of Rodgers and Hammerstein, Lerner and Loewe, Jule Styne and Frank Loesser, it would have closed at intermission. Today it will run five years and stupid theatergoers will jump to their feet screaming with delight at the curtain call. Like I said a depressing example of NYC theater today. Rotten music, second grade version of events, inane lyrics, embarrassing performances, ugly design and inept direction and choreography Did I mention I find it insulting, demoralizing, and sad. Oh and that it's hateful in every respect.

Ridiculous, laughable, toe curlingly awful.

More questions than answers...Why didn't they ask some English people to check the script? Why are the paparazzi in 1940s fancy dress? Why was Wales labelled? What were they thinking making this at all? Is it actually supposed to be a comedy?