Piccolo Teatro

In my brief overview of KITCHEN NIGHTMARES I touched upon the point that there's a fundamental cause as to why an eatery is failing , a mix of the owner/manager leaving everything to the head chef who lacks incentive , passion and sees their kitchen job as a means of getting paid . Nothing illustrates this better than this episode featuring a vegetarian restaurant Picollo Teatro set in the heart of Paris . Even if you're used to the formulaic feel of the show and find it repetitive then this episode might just shock you . It shocked me as I found myself watching a French/Ecosse hybrid of FAWLTY TOWERS

Gordon Ramsay arrives trying to solve the problems of Rachel an ex-pat Scot , her best friend Stephanie and chef Daniel from Brazil but within minutes it's very clear that Rachel , Stephanie and Daniel are the problem along with whatever substances they've been consuming by the kilo . Honestly they've all been taking something that came from a field in Helmand province Afghanistan

" How would you describe the food ? " Ramsay asks Stephanie

" Not particularly spectacularly exceptional " slurs Stephanie as she gives the impression she's in an Amsterdam cannabis café

But Stephanie is relatively pious compared to Daniel who proceeds to impersonate Cameroon footballer Roger Milla giving a goal line celebration . He can dance the light fantastic but takes more than 20 minutes to do a couple of salads whilst rearranging the kitchen utensils on the rack because ... well just because . You don't need me to tell you this is unacceptable even if you've died from a smack overdose , So Ramsay suggests dumping Daniel in the middle of service , cue lots of knife waving and dancing from Daniel who is carried out by force by Ramsay

This sums up things to come . If something has to done then Ramsay has to do it himself . Let's think about this . Rachel employs an eccentric Brazilian footballer who is either mentally ill or on drugs and she doesn't notice this until the cameras arrive . People in this show are the perpetrators of their own misfortune rather than being victims of other peoples flaws but the ignorant and lazy attitude continues the next day as Ramsay opens Picollo Teatro , preps up the food and waits for Rachel and Stephanie who turn up when they feel like it . Ramsay asks Stephanie if she's committed to the business to which she replies in slurred tones " I am committed to Rachel but I refuse to be harassed and insulted " and then walks out . Ramsay also walks out which tells you all you need to know

As someone with much kitchen experience this is shocking stuff . 100 per cent commitment isn't good enough . 110 per cent might just get you there but only if you have the attitude that only death itself can stop you making a success of your business . Fair play to Ramsay because most people would have given up on Rachel by this point but he pulls his finger out and does his best to rescue someone else's business and Rachel's father helps by bringing in a 23 year old chef India who hails from Edinburgh , a city immoratalised as having wall to wall smack addicts and ironically India is the first person featured by name who doesn't give the impression she's addicted to class A drugs

And it's heart warming to see the sole benefactor of this episode is India whose attitude and work ethic gains Ramsay's respect and gives her a placement in a top London restaurant . Well done girl and a great example of if you help yourself people will do their utmost to help you . As for Rachel the other commentators have pointed out her well deserved fate . Let this be an example of if you're wanting to make a success of a food business you have to work hard at it . It's also a bad idea to have magic mushrooms on the staff menu too . As a footnote if you google Rachel you'll find she found a career path that probably suits her talents